Why are girls being into masculine things encouraged, but boys being into feminine things are discouraged and made fun of?

TheGodOFnoOne · 2021-06-23T12:27:24+00:00

Dude all my life I've been forced to give up hobbies because either society deemed it as not masculine enough or waste of time for a man

I used to be one of the best painters in my school , won multiple awards got a fucking scholarship for a animation degree in a university , I gave up on arts when my family mocked the scholarship and prise as a waste of time and I would have to live on the streets , since these are course women take just for the sake of a degree like home science or gender studies. In the end I went to a engineering school

GltyUntlPrvnInncnt · 2021-06-23T16:17:30+00:00

Because even today, female gender roles are fluid. Male gender roles on the other hand are set in stone. You deviate from them and suddenly you're gay or something.

irrelevantmoniker · 2021-06-23T10:17:50+00:00

No see. If there's a community that exists that's exclusively or intensely for one gender inevitably part of the discussion is going to be about negotiating with the opposite sex to better the position of the community gender. The negotiations might be individual on individual but this lets collective effort be harnessed by the individual in the negotiation. This doesn't happen in mixed communities in the same way.

As a result all male dominant communities must be diluted with females to neuter their ability to strategize for the gender negotiation. But female dominant communities must remain sacrosanct to retain THEIR ability to strategize for the gender negotiation.

yoitsericc · 2021-06-23T16:50:44+00:00

Gender roles today are only selectively enforced.

The reason for this is simple - feminism is about power and privilege, not equality, so while men are expected to be traditionally masculine providers and protectors, women can be whatever and still be praised.

It's gotten to the point that we basically applaud women for being out of order, maybe even pay them, and never shame them. Men have left the church because of this and many are dropping out of higher education because of this.

It's a shame but it's not going to change as long as we exist in a feminine primary social order.

smokeacoil · 2021-06-23T10:19:32+00:00

To be honest I don't know it feels like just liking these things makes people trans these days and it confuses the fuck out of me

To answer the lotion thing I have had the problem of girls wanting me to use it not to be less manly but for softer fingers as we adulted and that became my normal idea of how girls thought about it

Mysckievitch · 2021-06-23T10:05:17+00:00

Well women could more through out the history. Man need to be strong to fight for his women and family. Woman needed to take care of home and kids while men were gathering resources for family. This system colapsed but thinking is still here. But this trend tends to change, have you seen boys nowadays. Boys will get their freedom they gaining it now, we just need some time

MaleficentMatter1335 · 2021-06-23T14:18:39+00:00

Idk about you but r/196 has a huge obsession with feminine boys /s.

mmpro55 · 2021-06-23T16:25:45+00:00

It's because our current culture glorifies two things 1) equality and 2) masculinity. As in, we care about the success of the "underdog" and we interpret success through the use of traditional "masculine" metrics.

It's funny because feminism is the most sexist, anti-woman creation in our modern time, and people don't even realize it. If you examine it at a deeper level, they believe the concepts of the "feminine" that are so invariably present in most mammalian species are somehow less critical to the success of our species than the concept of the "masculine". Somehow being a mother is less important than having a career. Somehow raising the next generation is less important than clocking in another 40 hours each week at the office. It's a bunch of people looking at the history of female success and saying, "yeah, none of that was important. If only they were doing what men were doing". It hurts my brain.

WeaknessTechnical654 · 2021-06-23T16:26:41+00:00

Yes something that gets overlooked a lot. Why do people think gender roles are only for women... So many exist for men too.

Magical-Hummus · 2021-06-23T16:26:55+00:00

I have escema. You better believe after getting I am gonna be obsessed with skin care. Besides, I also like to look young and healthy.

BigCashRegister · 2021-06-23T16:40:18+00:00

I really dislike that this is the way it is. I also really dislike the idea that I can’t change it, I think it’s time we all ought to start standing up for what we enjoy and we believe in regardless of double standards and gender norms. I’m a guy and I like to knit, take good care of my skin and long hair, paint, and even paint my nails. Who cares that those are “girly” things, I like them.

MisterDamage · 2021-06-23T17:08:06+00:00

I used a bit of lotion on my hands before class started. The girl sitting next to me giggled and said "isn't that a girl thing?". It's just lotion, men have skin, skin can get dry, what does gender have to do here?

You should check out Bill Burr's bit on lotion

Lexdrillo · 2021-06-23T19:18:42+00:00

Don't get me started on how this creates insecurity. At least in my experience.

CrunchyJeans · 2021-06-23T18:04:18+00:00

I’m a sensitive man and a gentleman. I have feelings. Sometimes they spill over. I see a movie with emotionally ouching moments? You better believe my tear ducts are having a field day.

I also love to help people no matter what they identify as. Like opening doors or complimenting people on their accomplishments or style. It just so happens that helping out a woman or similar can be considered as sexual harassment now. Which is stupid and depressing for me.

Why is it so hard to be me in today’s world? Not to mention I’m totally fine with purple and pink (just not hot pink).

CarelessTrifle5242 · 2021-06-23T19:21:23+00:00

If a choice is given Kids choose activities based on their gender. Thus when someone says isn't it a boy thing or a girl thing they are just saying their observation.

Sadly some people like to make games as gender neutral and that isn't going to happen because equal opportunity never leads to equal outcome, it always leads to choice based outcome!

DavidByron2 · 2021-06-23T13:34:14+00:00

Women are first class people so they are allowed to lower themselves to be more male. But if a male tries to go the other direction they are being uppity.

It's like asking "Why can masters pretend to be slaves, but if slaves pretend to be masters everyone gets bent out of shape?"

When slaves pretend to be masters that's called a slave uprising.

Reddit1984Censorship · 2021-06-23T11:50:14+00:00

I disagree on this one men are super encouraged to be femenien as well in current society.
What i dont like is the discouragment for men to be masculine and woman to be femenine.

dylvaz · 2021-06-23T13:42:37+00:00

Where I come from it’s discouraged for women to like masculine things and for men to like feminine things. I was called a dyke for choosing my school uniforms shorts over the skirts and my guy friend was heavily made fun of and called gay when some people saw him using chapstick. It changes for every culture but overall I think it has to do with the persons upbringing

Mr_g00dguy · 2021-06-23T11:16:44+00:00

Hey genious guess what, nowadays nobody does that, toddler boys are encouraged, considering they're toddlers they've been forced, in a sense, to be "trans" (if it was possible) or at least be "feminine". People cherish the idea of their boy wants to dress like a girl or likes pink etc. And all of this is basically child abuse, male children abuse to be exact. I don't mean you got to force gender roles on children but doing exact opposite thing is also wrong. And if you think this statement is remotely homophobic or transphobic I don't give a shit cause its not.

Clockw0rk · 2021-06-23T13:18:48+00:00

It's simple really.

Women are innately more selfish than men.

They want to have all the benefits of being masculine while also being feminine, but because they are selfish they also gatekeep what's determined to be feminine.

"Women and children first", as they say. It's not enough that feminists "fight for equality", it's part of the doctrine that they pull up the ladder behind them. TERFs are a perfect example of this. It's the same reason why women fight against male shelters and programs. They know the pool of resources for these programs are limited, so they insist upon having exclusively female programs.

Decessus · 2021-06-23T12:43:35+00:00

Because of toxic masculinity!!

/s

LastRounder · 2021-06-23T11:22:38+00:00

Because there is such a thing as biologically determinated traits in species.

Wich are so because of natural selection.

I'll try to explain it simplistically.

Guys (on average) are stronger, more ambitious and willing to take risks. They are more active. Plus one man can father a lot of children, so it is only natural for men to be protectors and providers, and, also, due to natural traits, they are more likely to be in charge of society.

Societies are formed around men, depend on men, rely on men, so men have more strict frames of acceptable behavior, activities, duties and all. Because any fluctuations beyond adequate will put society at risk.

So those societies, that were maintaining strict frames of acceptable for men survived, and those who did not become extinct.

Women, however, due to gestation and feeding period, lesser physical strength, lower stress durability and other traits, were more vulnerable than men, so they were protected and cared about, because population growth and replacement of deceased individuals was bottle-necked via number of reproductive women in society.

As a result, one of most valuable to societies from survival perspective, traits in women were ability to gestate, feed and care for children. And that is, in most cases a toolkit, that any healthy adequate women possess at plausible level. So survival of society was not as much dependant on women personal traits,than on their physical traits.

That's why if a girl is playing with Lego, toy cars and toy soldiers it poses no problem, because it is not a selection trait.

But when boy deviates from set rules of what a man should be, it is a big deal, because it puts on the risk, not only him, but others who depend on him.

That is just human evolution, selective traits, social behavior and a huge bunch of other adaptations, that enabled survival of mankind for last 2,5 billion years, or so. And that's completely normal. Because it works.

Edit: Well, saying that traditional gender norms do not exist for women anymore is a huge delusion and exaggeration. There are attempts to make things look like that, but most of them are either fake, or failed. Like femz proclaiming, that they like nice guys, and end up sleeping with some Chad guy. Because that is what they really want under all that conscious and unconscious act. And wanting a Chad is perfectly normal. Not normal is hypocricy about it.

AskWhyKnot · 2021-06-23T13:34:06+00:00

Feminists will claim it's because the patriarchy thinks that masculine things are good and feminine things are bad.

birds4doofenshmirtz · 2021-06-23T15:47:03+00:00

Patriarchy

MaxMustemal · 2021-06-23T10:42:38+00:00

TBH I think it's a female problem. We have to be honest here, women do most of the care taking of the kids, of course it's not good, and of course it should change, but it's still that way today. Anyway, in my experience no woman wants a "sissy" boy. He should be manly, the man of the house, because that's what kind of a man she (the mom) looked for and she thinks she knows what women are looking for. And of course she doesn't want a boy who brings a girl home who's bossing him around. And with girls, well moms don't want "manly" girls..."How should they find a partner?" That's why they shouldn't play/do boys stuff.

I don't think this would change if men and women would do exactly 50% of the care taking, because I think both have that kind of attitude.

I also don't think that it will change in the next few years, IMO the last and the current generation just have to die so that that kind of mindset will go away.

I have only girls and I couldn't care less what kind of colors they like, what kind of clothes they like more, what kind of toys they prefere and eventually what kind of partner they choose. I'm happy if they are happy, that's all that matters to me. But I can see that I'm a minority when I look around the people and friends I know and have.

Silver_The_Bard · 2021-06-23T21:49:23+00:00

Double standards.

We as a society haven't put the time or effort into male role reform and acceptance after women did it. It seems that when you only address the needs of half your population, the other half gets left behind. Men have to play by the old rules while women are judged by a new playbook.

DarkLordKindle · 2021-06-23T23:27:55+00:00

I feel sorry for the kids. If a guy shows interest in fem things, he is pushed to being trans. Same with girls being into masc things.

punkertroll · 2021-06-24T04:53:08+00:00

Nowdays if a men or woman do opposite gender things then they diagnos it with being a different gender "trapped in a different body".

DubsPackage · 2021-06-24T18:03:09+00:00

Because masculine things = money and power

Feminine things = comfort and pleasantry

If you're a man who is into feminine things, you're not performing your role as a provider, you're too self-interested with your own comfort, you have to sacrifice yourself in order to be manly.

But if you're a woman who is into masculine things, it means you're ambitious and want to be more powerful.

Smallpaul · 2021-06-23T14:25:02+00:00

Really it’s simple: the other explanations here are over complicated.

Rich people have higher status than poor people. Therefore it is shameful for a rich or middle class person to dress like a hobo. No middle class parent wants their kid doing that.

Men traditionally have had higher status than women. That’s why America has never had a woman president, for example. So women acting as men are trying to improve their status. People understand that. Men acting as women are seen as degrading themselves and being weak. So that’s shameful.

EvilLothar · 2021-06-23T15:05:42+00:00

Because what is masculine is seen as "better" then what is feminine, mostly by feminists. So, rather then trying to teach women and girls to be the best female they can be, they try to convince them to beat the boys at their own game, and thus, you end up with women who have no children, 5 cats, and a great career, and wondering why they can't get a good man.

Oh, and don't kid yourself. Those traditional gender norms are alive and well. Women end up happier when they follow them, and so do men. Of course, there are outliers, but for the most part, it's part of who we are genetically, and a few decades of brainwashing isn't going to change that.

Title	Why are girls being into masculine things encouraged, but boys being into feminine things are discouraged and made fun of?
Author	blonko4309
Upvotes	288
Comments	75
Date	June 23, 2021 10:00 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/o69r4s/why_are_girls_being_into_masculine_things/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-are-girls-being-into-masculine-things.825637 https://theredarchive.com/post/825637

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