I mentor a younger man who dated his wife for several years before marrying her. He cared for her as she went through mental illness and physical illness prior to and after marriage. He has been her rock. They have been married for under two years.

He chose his work city based on her needs, picked their place to live based on her desires, now has relocated for her social worker job, which, while admirable, has negligible earnings potential compared to his executive track job. He is incredibly stressed and has become depressed because marriage and the job are not at all what he expected.

He gives and gives and he can no longer take it. He walks on eggshells around her and she can’t see that she is the source of his stress because she has prioritized her well being to the point of running him into the dirt. I am starting to fear for his mental well being and he feels trapped, like there is no way out.

He may have married this woman out of a sense of obligation and I wish I had broached that topic before the marriage but that ship has sailed.

They have already been to marriage counseling. He was supposed to “work on some things” but I have been unable to unearth specifics. It seems that she is making unfair emotional demands on the young man — it appears to be a one way street that is a long one indeed.

I saw them together a week ago and have been mulling over this post since then. When I saw them together and observed what I thought had been the case and that I described above, I thought “they will be divorced in a couple of years and he will be miserable until then.”

What feedback or advice does this forum have?