Being watched

bald_headed_yeti · 2021-07-25T14:24:10+00:00

reddit is the stealthy forum or you could go 4chan but the advice you get there may put you in prison.

My stbx has no idea reddit or discord exist.

rockhoppernostopper · 2021-07-25T15:55:43+00:00

I had to delete my old reddit account for exactly this reason.

SpacemanLost · 2021-07-25T16:44:58+00:00

Not that uncommon.

My ex to this day, more than a decade later, feels the need to snoop on and monitor me. She truly believes she has a right to know and to somehow control my life still.

In the early years of our divorce she would find out some tidbit from my online activity, or though other people, and message or call me up out of the blue, revealing something she discovered (often inaccurate) and either yell and scream or try shaming language.

If I did not have kids with her, I would have hard blocked. As it was she used access to them as a weapon, so My response was a mix of ignoring her and new accounts/blocking her.

She has trained my kids to tell her everything I say and do during visitation. They don't see how F'd up that is.

Here is a great recent example of her behavior:

Not that long ago when I had my kids for visitation I was explaining to my 16 year-old son about medial insurance and how screwed you can be without it. I told him about an incident when his mom went to the ER for chest pains during a small gap in out insurance coverage and though it turned out to be literally nothing, the ER billed us ten grand. I still have copies of the bill, as I spent months fighting for a lower settlement, while she blissfully ignored it at the time.

At 2AM that night, my ex started blowing up my phone, his phone, and my other child's phone, screaming that I had lied about her ER visit costing ten grand. My kids quickly said "leave us out of it", while I just muted her. When I returned the kids to her, she brought it up again.

I have other examples about her somehow finding out about Real Estate purchases or vacations I took which I never mentioned and her expressing her entitlement. The list of things about me and my life without her that she feels entitled to is endless, and can wear a normal person out.

To this day, it has not dawned her that I have changed and matured since when she first me when I was 21. I put up with a lot when married because I didn't know better, and though that accommodating her and making her happy was what a husband does.

Bioshock_Jock · 2021-07-25T13:41:17+00:00

When you live rent free in her head.

dudefromyork · 2021-07-25T18:19:25+00:00

STBX blocked me on all social media while we were still together and supposedly trying to sort things out. Really just to make me ask her to add me back I think....more about the power/control thing than anything else. I never once asked about it.

Fast forward 6 months into our separation. I get a FB friend request from her. It’s still pending 5 weeks later.

alcosexual · 2021-07-25T20:19:26+00:00

This is all projection.

I am not a social media person. I don't have a FB or Snapchat or Instagram, but that didn't stop her from constantly bringing up "the people I talk to on Reddit" or my "friends on Reddit."

It doesn't help that she's not very technically savvy. Of course I tried explaining years ago that everyone is mostly anonymous and my username isn't some alter ego or assumed persona where I cosplay as a single dude looking for hookups.

But eventually it dawned on me that she didn't really care about the truth, she just liked being able to rant about Reddit because more than likely she was doing all the stuff she accused me of on her personal accounts which I never bothered to look at or care about.

Again - all projection all the time.

OriginalFinnah · 2021-07-25T21:36:42+00:00

Hey to op's ex. Go seek counseling. get help

henrysmyagent · 2021-07-25T23:50:46+00:00

My friend, I'm not being snarky, but I envy you.

You have learned a valuable lesson about women and marriage.

Yes, that lesson came at a painful cost, but you are young. You have plenty of time to build a better, more interesting, more exciting life for yourself.

Throw yourself into your hobbies, friends, and family. Now is the time to discover what interests you, excites you, even what scares you. Then confront them all.

Commit yourself to never again live for another woman. Live your life for yourself.

A woman should never be your goal in life. She is supposed to be a companion on the journey. An enhancement to your life, but never your life's sole purpose.

Get out their and truly live!

vector5633 · 2021-07-26T00:17:34+00:00

This is my only Social Media account. My X Cunt wife wouldn't find me here. Marrying that cunt was one of the dumbest things I ever did. She not my problem anymore.

SwamiSweatSocks · 2021-07-26T01:46:38+00:00

My ex uses my kids phone to track me. She went to my neighbors while I was gone to a job site and slandered the hell out of me to the neighbors. Some women can be purely evil.

Title	Being watched
Author	Dmoney91
Upvotes	22
Comments	24
Date	July 25, 2021 1:12 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/orbbhr/being_watched/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/being-watched.816409 https://theredarchive.com/post/816409

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