I won’t go into all the details of my situation, you can read my post history. But I have a question about confirming suspicions about an affair partner and whether contacting them would be wise?

So a couple years ago I screenshot a slew of text messages and email messages between my wife and another guy, and her and another girl who she was having an “emotional affair” with for lack of a better term. Now I had brought up divorce at this time mostly because of the girl because I thought it was the worse offense. Well she explained it away and I went with it and time marched on into the sunset.

The reason for this post is the guy she was messaging… I recently started digging into those again and put some facts together.

1) they said things to each other that you could consider an emotional affair (I love you, I miss you, I’m obsessed with you, etc) but I didn’t have a lot to go from. 2) I found a bunch of emails that confirmed payments from him to her through Facebook messenger. Over a year’s time it amounted to about $5300 that I have evidence of. Now I know for a fact he’s a security guard, i doubt he makes that much money so that would be a substantial amount. It makes me think that he was getting something in return…

Now to the point of my post, I’m already considering divorce but feel wishy-washy about going through with it as she has made some changes for the better. If she actually did something with this guy it would definitely give me some confidence and proof to go forward with it. Should I confront the guy about if they actually did anything? I’m not looking to smear anyone, just want some concrete evidence to base my decision on.