Settle and walk?

2021-01-22T19:34:59+00:00

You’ll always make more money. You have your kids 50/50. Houses appraise at what they appraise at. Just because you value it doesn’t mean the bank does. Sounds like your divorce did what it was intended to do. Free up your life to find happiness.

Let it go. You’ll always make more money.

JohnnyMnemo · 2021-01-22T20:07:43+00:00

take your aggrieved principles out of it and do what makes financial sense.

im fighting because not fighting is more expensive to me longterm than the short term legal costs. thats what it comes down to, i did the math.

otherwise take the emotion out of it.

LandOnMyFeet · 2021-01-22T20:38:54+00:00

There is no winning!

Make/take the best deal you can get for yourself to move forward with your life.

If you’re thinking about winning you lost.

Remember the best deal to move forward.

clearmind_1001 · 2021-01-23T04:03:58+00:00

If you have kids, you will win in a divorce if you get 50/50 Shared time , everything else is irrelevant, you can always make more money but you can never make up lost time with the kids

_sft · 2021-01-22T19:18:03+00:00

Definitely ask a lawyer. You have to start again and that affects the kids greatly too. Been exactly where you're at, man. It will get better once all this is over and you're free. Don't screw yourself over though. Trust me, you will regret it.

sicrm · 2021-01-22T18:50:29+00:00

you probably can’t do much about CS.

for the buyout amount though ask your lawyer. did she win the house or did you decide to give it to her? if it’s the latter you can ask for a better amount or say you want a sale.

if it’s the former then try getting someone to evaluate the house. if you already did they then either ask your lawyer or talk to another one about what your options are to get a better amount

billywilco · 2021-01-22T21:56:08+00:00

“The best divorce is where both people walk away a little unhappy.” - my Judge.

Congrats on the 50/50. I started out with 7 percent time because of lies by the ex and vicious lawyers. I’d say the goal is the kids, finances are import though. I couldn’t get out of my 7% time because she got 60% of my paycheck and the judge ordered me to have a 2-be apartment which I couldn’t afford as a result of the garnishment. It’s been terrible.

If it’s causing a huge issue around your ability to live, fight. If you’re just trying to be petty, be grateful and enjoy your life to the best of your ability now you’re done with an evil ex.

Good luck!

JasonInNJ · 2021-01-23T05:53:26+00:00

Walk. So worth it.

Meathead89gonzo · 2021-01-22T19:50:37+00:00

I thought you didn’t have to past CS of you have 50/50?

MyNewNormal808 · 2021-01-23T09:14:30+00:00

I was in a similar situation. I got to keep the investments in my name and my retirements. She got the properties and house. There was one remaining issue of paying half of the cap gains while she got all of the profits. In the end I calculated that it was cheaper to accept it vs paying my lawyer to go fight it out in court for a risky judgement from a stranger. Funny thing, right after the divorce was settled, she has to get the house tented for termites and put on a new roof.

RepresentativeOk5968 · 2021-01-30T16:34:27+00:00

50/50 custody is great for you.

As for finances, that you may need to fight on depending on the amount involved. If there isn't much equity in the house, it's not that big a deal walking away. In my case, we had about 60k in equity depending on the selling price you went with (I obviously said the house was worth less since I wanted to stay and buy her out, she said more). Ultimately, you can ask in the agreement to sell the house and split the proceeds instead of letting her have it free and clear. Again though, this is only worthwhile if there is a decent amount of equity otherwise you both are going to be selling at a loss.

As for letting her "win" it is a bitter pill to swallow when she looks like the cat that ate the canary and thinks she took you to the cleaners. But don't just let her screw you over, and don't be afraid to go to court if you think she is being unfair to you.

Title	Settle and walk?
Author	houndhair
Upvotes	16
Comments	18
Date	January 22, 2021 6:30 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/l2ttao/settle_and_walk/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/settle-and-walk.817525 https://theredarchive.com/post/817525

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