Ok so three months ago my wife of 21yrs asked for a divorce, and I'll take the heat that I screwed up a lot things up over the years and pretty much deserved it. Blindsided? Sure. But on retrospect I'll the signs were there and I ignored them. Since then I've gone to therepists and have done a lot of self flogging to find confidence and self respect. I have a long ways to go to right my personal ship. Meanwhile I've moved out and been staying at a friend's condo. I just find her waffling now and it's confusing. She keeps harping on the past. I can't change my past behaviors but have come to terms with them the best I can as I seek personal growth and self forgiveness. She now wants to think about things. What does that even mean? Is she having second thoughts, unresolved anger, buying time? She hasn't filed and hasn't really talked about it. This has left me in the lurch. When I told her I'll file she blew up and called me selfish because she needs space and I'm just pushing her away. Wait? What? She was the one who dropped the D-bomb and went walls up for a couple of months. Isnt divorce the ultimate "i want space?: Mentally, I can't unwind the "I love you but I'm not in love with you" conversation. I'm willing to work on the marriage, and I am firmly on solid ground with all this. I'm just lived confused now and thought I'd see what you guys think. Thanks in advance.