Being called a gold digger

Gambit12345 · 2020-10-10T04:23:12+00:00

In my pick me days I started dating a guy who turned out to be cheap as fuck. Split everything down the middle even $30 groceries right off the bat as he was a “come to my house and lets make dinner as a date” type. Also lived at home, college drop out with deadend job, while I was in graduate school and a couple years younger than him. He called me his dream woman (seriously I was a doormat) and yet he always made me pay half for everything. He also never took me on dates saying restaurant food wasn’t good. He had taken his ex on dates, (through my snooping I learned he dumped her like a couple weeks before we met on OLD)but I begged for a year for a dinner date and guess who planned the first anniversary date with no help?🙋🏽‍♀️🤡🤡🤡 he later told me if I wanted a date I needed to plan it, AND he was playing video games at the time! 💀 and I was allegedly his dream woman!! Even when men say you’re their dream woman, look at the actions because words are truly meaningless. He knew I was going to be a dr one day and I was a supreme pick me. He told me what he thought I wanted to hear and subtly manipulated me into dropping my standards because I was so desperate to be loved by him and insecure because he’d neg me and he knew it. I changed myself to suit him, was literally like his shadow companion, and when I tried to leave he’d manipulate me into staying. beware this type of lazy man who seems benign on the surface. They’ll be fine as a roommate and most people wouldn’t have anything bad to say about them. but they absolutely drop the ball as a partner/boyfriend and if they see success in your future they’ll latch onto you. Won’t even attempt to meet your needs even if you’re a broken record about it. In my case HE was the gold digger, saying how I’d buy him a home gym and all the protein when I was a dr, meanwhile he never said what he’d do for me. Even his dad joked about me being his sugar mama which I immediately shot down.

vibewitheasi · 2020-10-10T06:08:25+00:00

A lot of these men seem to forget that in order to even attract a “gold digger “ you have to have GOLD. 🤦🏽‍♀️

aquietsword · 2020-10-10T09:27:08+00:00

I'm not calling you out on it because this is how it's phrased on reddit all the time, just commenting, but "withholding" sex always makes me feel like the people complaining are making the woman out to be some sort of manipulative game player when she probably just doesn't want to have sex. I hate it.

Half_Halt · 2020-10-10T15:02:31+00:00

I've mentioned this before: any man who complains/worries about women gold digging is simply angry that he's unsuccessful. And he's not in a mindset to become successful. Full stop.

I live in a wealthy area. Have never heard a man here complain about gold diggers. Quite the contrary. They advertise their status, "Hey, ladies! Platinum mine here! I'm giving away free samples Saturday from 1-4. Hope to see you there!"

seraphinelysion · 2020-10-10T07:16:56+00:00

[deleted]

Davina33 · 2020-10-10T08:12:10+00:00

I feel this. I'm quite an attractive woman with a lot going from me but I have a lot of physical health problems, none of them my fault. Autoimmune disorders and parts of my body not working due to being starved throughout my childhood. I've had some partners who looked down on me for that and treated me as lesser than as a result. It is what it is and I have to be extremely careful of their intentions, I know we all do. If I had been overweight from the steroids and immunosuppressants I can only imagine it would be even harder. I'm a brown woman too.

flower-student · 2020-10-10T09:43:25+00:00

my ex worked while I was in school and he still asked to split bc even though I don’t work, he said I go to school for free. I tried to make it easy for him and tell him I wanted to get matching charms (that were right in front of us) and he just awkwardly backed away. in that moment I knew it would end so that night I got back I just downloaded dating apps, ghosted him and went on a date two days later lol

then a week later he texts me a long essay about how his feelings were hurt and that he cried 😂

what you said about splitting is very true.

Cucharamama · 2020-10-10T14:16:18+00:00

The same men that complain about women being gold diggers are the same ones that wont stop bragging about all the stuff they supposedly have. If you don’t like gold diggers then stop flaunting what you “have”.

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2020-10-11T03:03:34+00:00

Bringing up "gold diggers" is definitely a scummy way to get a girlfriend to double down on giving in a one-sided relationship where the man is already checked out. Trashy men will do it shamelessly.

Title	Being called a gold digger
Author	redfarmmmmm
Upvotes	150
Comments	20
Date	October 10, 2020 3:59 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/j8dsrs/being_called_a_gold_digger/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/being-called-a-gold-digger.323224 https://theredarchive.com/post/323224

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