A date is not the place for a man to dump his emotional baggage on you.

You might feel “flattered” that he is confiding in you and be tempted to be his shoulder to cry on. Don’t.

  1. An HVM wouldn’t do this in the first place because it’s bad manners, embarrassing for everyone involved and shows a serious lack of self management.
  2. The LVM doing it won’t respect you for it but may continue to use you as his emotional dumping ground if you go along with it.

This rule goes both ways - don’t be tempted to try and bond by revealing your problems and insecurities - all you’re really doing is opening yourself up to potential exploitation.

Field report: The OLD first date where the man used the fact I was trapped at a dinner table to word vomit his sob story all over me about the ex leaving him, the ex’s daughter still asking him for money, the true love who broke his heart when he was young - while never asking me a thing.

I had to try not to cry, not because I felt sorry for him, but because I had wasted time messaging and a new outfit that was now drenched in the misery of the pathetic loser sitting in front of me.

I finished dinner as quickly as possible and basically ran to the restaurant door, where he caught me and asked me if I would like to go for a walk by the water. I said “I can not think of anything worse”. His face dropped. HE’D been having a good time, of course. Shame about me.