I have no words

proudpine · 2021-07-01T15:28:06+00:00

It’s better to stand up for yourself late than never.

I hope she makes him move out until marriage too, but understand that with four kids that’s a logistical nightmare.

She’s allowed herself to be cornered.

snowwhite224 · 2021-07-01T15:24:18+00:00

Well at least it sounds like she has woken up some.

pickmieshaexorcist · 2021-07-01T15:35:25+00:00

Creating 4 human beings isn’t too much commitment, but going to the courthouse to get a marriage license is a step too far!

AriaLuz · 2021-07-01T15:42:04+00:00

First thing that she did wrong was have the first kid. The second thing was she had baby no. 2, 3, & 4 without a ring. Third thing was that she quit her job to stay at home without the financial security of marriage and her own money. Now she wants to back track. If he wanted to marry her, he would have married you before the first kid.

She needs to stick to her guns here. If she has to leave with her children then so be it.

vforvendetta87 · 2021-07-01T15:43:45+00:00

It’s actually VERY healthy to withdraw from a relationship where YOUR needs are not being met. I’ve done it and will do it again. If your partner doesn’t get the hint then he/she was never “all-in” to begin with.

spinsterchachkies · 2021-07-01T15:32:24+00:00

I wish her luck.

millennialpink2000 · 2021-07-01T15:42:00+00:00

Each word is stupider than the last.

Why would he marry her when she's already shit out 4 kids and has paid for their living arrangements with her inheritance money? He's got the absolute best deal going on here, at the expense of her sanity. Up until now, his empty words have been enough to keep stringing her along, why would he change?

Now that sex is off the table (LOOOOOL that won't last long) she might get a begrudging "fine, we'll get a piece of paper cuz you want it so badly" and he'll be so resentful it'll eat him up inside. HE DOESN'T WANT TO MARRY YOU. Take the last shred of dignity you have left and run away from this moron who's wasting your time

notochord · 2021-07-01T15:46:44+00:00

God, that poor women.

I hate how oblivious men are about things “suddenly” being issues. Nah dude, you’ve been WILLFULLY IGNORING HER FOR YEARS!

ndf250 · 2021-07-01T15:48:37+00:00

“He said he wanted to marry me” IF HE WANTED TO HE WOULD

ProfessionalPee · 2021-07-01T15:50:31+00:00

Im disgusted by the fact she had to make an edit because people are MAD SHES NOT HAVING SEX?

It doesnt matter if she has a reason or not, thats her personal fucking choice! We gave a word for intercourse when somebody doesn't want to have that intercourse. Its called rape.

"Urgh why arent you kindly letting him rape you? Smh"

queenofswordsxxx · 2021-07-01T15:50:01+00:00

Notice how being with him is an entire NET LOSS

Financially: She pays for the house & bills with INHERITANCE MONEY, unclear how much he provides and he’s ‘not ambitious’

Emotionally: Ignores her clear emotional need to get married, pressures her into sex and commitment with false promises, spiritually bankrupts her Christian beliefs and her peace of mind

Career: She gave it up for their ‘relationship dynamic’, she’s ‘busy with the kids’ so she’s likely dealing with the bulk of the household responsibilities. She says it herself that she ‘serves him’ in whatever way she can.

So girl, what is he bringing to the table???? Empty promises and a lifetime of hurt!!!!!

Does this ‘good guy’ even do or give anything to/ for you?!

Honestly all this shows is how men, religion and their antiquated expectations for women only serves to exploit us - for our wombs, our sexuality, our freedom, our peace and our finances, and ultimately sabotages our potential to be something other than what religion says we should be.

AudQueen · 2021-07-01T16:04:13+00:00

I got hopeful when I saw that she was withdrawing from “wifely duties” like maybe that means kicking him out too and giving him the kids 50/50. But then I saw the hE’s nOt aS bAd aS I mADe hIm oUt tO bE and hope was extinguished. She literally just stated the truth. She has 4 kids and no marriage even though she’s been wanting it for years. What man who loves you, gives you 4 kids while dangling the marriage carrot in front of you.

This is yet another reminder that you have to ruthlessly advocate for yourself always. Because men who aren’t actively giving you what you want don’t feel guilty for it. They hear you and CHOOSE not to. He eats her special cooking, and takes in all of her efforts to be a good wife and doesn’t see anything wrong with this. He’s laughing at her and her efforts to get what she’s been wanting 4 babies ago.

Title	I have no words
Author	LiquidxDreams
Upvotes	32
Comments	17
Date	July 1, 2021 3:11 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/obnup6/i_have_no_words/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/i-have-no-words.787938 https://theredarchive.com/post/787938

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