I Left My NVM Ex Boyfriend.

Hi ladies!

Well I've been a part of this great community for some time now. I was drawn to this sub because I wasn't happy and knew my ex boyfriend was no good and this sub has opened my eyes.

He was much older and wouldn't marry me after 12 years together and cohabiting (yes, I know bad move). He claimed I would "take half of his house". To start with he was nice but I was working full time, studying and he wouldn't help do any housework. He would cook a meal sometimes and bake cakes. Before I moved in his house was a tip with a leaking porch which allowed wood lice to wander in. Took me two weeks with several bottles of bleach to get it looking presentable. He was so tight-fisted that he would complain if I used the dishwasher daily, we had to as my cat used a lot of bowls as well. He would moan about me putting the heat on or using the tumble dryer. The windows were blown so putting clothes on radiators to dry wasn't exactly helping.

I quickly woke up but due to my numerous health problems I became quite dependent on him. He would pay all the bills and because I wasn't working I had to rely on savings and pay for the food shopping, my cat's expenses and running my car. This was the bare minimum but he always held it over my head. He knew I was vulnerable and used it to his advantage. I come from a background of severe childhood abuse and whilst not an excuse, it made it difficult for me to leave. He even wrote a list of pros and cons about me and showed me, in my pros list all he wrote was that I was attractive, slim and kept the house tidy. Well things quickly changed. My parents-in-law who were wonderful loving people died within a month of each other in March and April. We were both devastated and I tried to support him as much as possible. I became ill with Covid-19 in May and he tried to kick me out! Yep seriously. I was unwell for two months. In July he started joining dating and sex websites although I didn't find this out until October. In 2010 I caught him messaging a married woman from work and trying to invite her round whilst I was staying with family. He said he was just flirting but I should have left him then. He would criticise me constantly, pout and moan if I met friends for coffee or invited them over. He would neg me. I'm 153cm and 42kg yet he said I was fat? I went out clubbing two years ago and stayed at my friend's flat. We phoned him from there and he gave me the silent treatment for a week and accused me of cheating.

In August he punched me in the back after I complained about him completely filling up the house with stuff from his parents' house. I could barely move about upstairs. He smashed glasses and plate, threw a bottle of cocoa butter at me but it missed and hit the wall. Anyway he was straight up abusive but last Sunday was the final straw. He threatened to seriously harm me. I phoned the police and fled to a woman's refuge. He is due to get a large inheritance from his parents' sold house in the next few weeks and that is not a coincidence.

We deserve better! New year, new beginning 🎉