So just finished watching the show fboy island on HBO. It’s a dating show where self-proclaimed “nice guys” who are looking for a relationship and self-proclaimed “fboys” who are looking to play games compete to win the heart of one of the 3 main ladies. There’s a $100k prize at stake for each potential couple. I won’t share any spoilers, but it was way better than I expected it to be.

Here are some of the biggest lessons I took away from the show: ON NICE GUYS WHO WANT A RELATIONSHIP ... - They won't cause you unnecessary struggle. - You'll always know exactly where you stand with them. - They aren’t looking for you to train them. - They don’t need you to be more understanding, empathetic and forgiving than the Pope. - They just show up and do the right things from jump. - In the case of conflict, they take the lead to quickly clear up any misunderstandings and make sure that the woman they care about feels secure. publicly.

ON FBOYS WHO WANT TO PLAY GAMES... - They bring confusion early on. - They use emotional manipulation and faux vulnerability to hook women. - They rely heavily on sexual chemistry. - When their feelings get hurt they lash out or disassociate. - They usually start with small lies or have some inclination of a shady past. - They make tons of mistakes and count on getting another chance to prove themselves. - They live off of the kindness of women and their prey's willingness to give the benefit of the doubt. - They fixate on a woman's looks and specific body parts (boobs, butt, feet, legs, etc). - They will play the long game, but who they showed themselves to be from jump is who they are unless they personally decide to change.

Most of these were things I knew, but seeing it in the show really helped anchor some of those lessons. Also seeing the women get pulled into the emotional rollercoaster that is entertaining fboys and confusing it as love was interesting to watch and then reflect on when I've done the same.

Fboys have a mentality that no matter how bad they dog you out they can always come back and smooth things over. Nice guys have a mentality that they might only get one shot and they don't want to ruin it, so they act accordingly.