A post on making men "take responsibility for causing men's issues"

QuantumPenguin89 · 2025-09-27T12:41:29+00:00

Men with mental health issues do need therapy

I'm not convinced. These mental health issues often don't come from nowhere, and therapy is often disappointing, it's not a magic bullet for everything. I feel we need to help each other solve the problems that cause or increase the probability of developing mental health issues instead of just being given advice on how to cope. We need: (1) movements that attempt to change society and culture in ways that are beneficial for men, and (2) professionals that are action-oriented and specialized in the issues that a particular individual may have that are causing him to struggle psychologically.

For example, a man may be miserable because he is unemployed. Many CBT practicioners will tell him that the "real" problem isn't lacking decent employment, it's his "irrational thoughts" about unemployment being a bad situation. It's gaslighting and attempts at self-brainwashing, IMO...

Exavior31 · 2025-09-27T10:19:39+00:00

Men didn't create gender norms, the rich and wealthy did to make the working class more exploitable and compliant. Any other take I've heard usually tries to erase how much men have historically suffered and died under traditional gender norms. That's my view of it anyway.

alter_furz · 2025-09-27T11:55:10+00:00

to "who set that system up?"

I always say "women are the majority of voters"

If men are the only ones held responsible for male issues, let females be the only group responsible for women's issues.

Ah, it doesn't work that way, it dOeSn'T fEeL gOoD when people suggest that.

FangornsWhiskers · 2025-09-27T18:44:39+00:00

It’s a bizarre Sins of the Father kind of argument. Some men, in the past, shaped our society. I certainly didn’t do it personally and telling a 17 year old kid with no life experience that he’s responsible for the problems of the world because “men created it” is obscene.

People have been making arguments like this since the beginning of time. What’s disturbing to me is that both women and men on the left have really latched on to it in this context and actively encourage it. It’s really frustrating.

Local-Willingness784 · 2025-09-28T01:18:14+00:00

unrelated but im kind of glad that im not in that subreddit anymore, the replies do seem to push back on whatever bullshit patriarchy the OP seemed to be pushing but the place is still full of "enlightened" men and women who seem to have it all figured out, which is a shame because the channel and the information Dr.K has is very good, even if often really out of touch with some male issues.

Argentarius1 · 2025-09-27T18:25:33+00:00

This is why it's impossible to help men unless you're hostile to feminism. Feminism does not have the ability to refrain from overblaming and overpunishing men and trying to reeingeer our character and stealing from our societal contributions.

still-not-a-lesbian · 2025-09-30T00:40:55+00:00

Full disclosure: I am both a woman and a feminist but I'm not here to judge. I love men and I believe in supporting men and I want to listen and understand.

Are we allowed to be a part if the conversation? Because what you described sounds like people maybe trying to figure out a way to discuss male issues in a manner that is respectful and accessible to men.

Not blaming men, and sympathizing with what they're going through sounds like respect? What am I missing?

sunyata150 · 2025-09-29T17:42:53+00:00

I think there are a couple things going on.
- Dr K has said so himself that he isn't an expert on feminist theory. He leaves that kind of analysis up to feminist scholars.

- Being a therapist its his job to focus on the individual; specifically who he works with.

This idea that men created the system attributes hyper autonomy to men as if men didn't have all kinds of pressures duties and obligations of there own. Seriously the vast majority of men through history have been peasants and commoners with few rights and little to no political power. How have men who were born into these systems responsible for creating it ? The answer to "Who created the system ?" is mother nature.

Sure-Artist6186 · 2025-11-14T22:57:43+00:00

So, idk if this is a hot take, but I think therapy isn't made for men. I know all that I'm about to say isn't statistically valid since is my experience, but It's something I and all the men on ma real life social circle agree, and I'm all up to edit this comment if anyone can enlighten me with some ACTUAL data.

So, basically, therapy depends on the thing that I (and my social circle) mostly despise, having to listen to someone who thinks they know you better than yourself. Like:" you have been you since ever, and I will never get a chance to walk even a cm on your shoes, yet I know you better than you know yourself and if you don't agree then you are using your denial as a coping mechanism and you must pay me to gaslight you into thinking all that you know about you was always harming you". Does anyone genuinely accept this? My genuine reaction would be a monumental " go f yourself".

Another thing that grosses me out of psychologist is something I heard from a friend of my dad who is a psychologist, they fight over that all the time and he always says:" the problem is that you're too smart to buy my $μ¡T"

Besides, have you read the APA guidelines for practice psychology with boys and men? It basically is:" men's patriarchy is so bad to the world that they are hurting even themselves". So, let me get this straight. Women's problems are men's fault, and men's problems are men's fault too? I don't think it makes sense o any way.

Anyone out there who knows something that is truly reliable beyond my own experience? I'd be grateful to know how far I'm from the truth tbh.

MochaYam · 2025-09-28T08:42:27+00:00

It is impossible to have sexism against one gender without sexism against the other. You cannot have sexism against women without having sexism against men, and vice versa, whether or not it is positive or negative sexism. It’s not like tribal groups, where, for instance, you may be able to oppress one tribe through negative discrimination and give positive discrimination to another tribe.

However, when it comes to men and women, who have always lived their lives together, this would be impossible to replicate. It’s not as if women and men lived separately, and suddenly men decided to colonize them. That would be biologically and societally impossible, as men and women both depend on each other to procreate and were always part of one tribe. Thus, sexism against one gender would also lead to privilege for that same gender in different ways.

Here’s an example: some young women complain that they are not taken seriously enough (the statistics are fuzzy, but generally true). This would mean that she may be more likely to be interrupted, her ideas not taken into consideration as much as they should be in the workplace, less likely to be taken seriously in positions of power, less likely to be taken seriously as a news anchor, etc.

However, this would also entail a variety of desirable outcomes for women when it comes to them doing bad actions. For instance, if a female caretaker gets angry and hits her child, she is less likely to be taken seriously than if a man were to do the same thing. Studies have found that men are always perceived as more threatening, and their actions are seen as more severe than women doing the exact same thing—because people don’t take her seriously enough.

This leads to a variety of other benefits as well, such as shorter jail time, lower likelihood of being arrested, and lower likelihood of being beaten up in an aggressive confrontation, etc.

During all-male drafts, when sometimes more than one million men are sent to die, it impacts both sexes as well. Think about it: imagine your sons, brothers, and fathers came home in body bags. Imagine the pain and suffering you would experience because of that.

Some more examples include the fact that women cannot own beauty and not be the objects of beauty. Women cannot receive extra help without suffering extra dependency. Women cannot enjoy extra protection without suffering the extra condescension that goes with it. Women cannot take parental primacy and still have equal time and energy left over to climb success ladders.

By definition, an x amount of sexism against women will entail x amount of sexism against men.

Title	A post on making men "take responsibility for causing men's issues"
Author	MSHUser
Upvotes	59
Comments	31
Date	September 26, 2025 11:04 PM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/1nrfprm/a_post_on_making_men_take_responsibility_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/a-post-on-making-men-take-responsibility-for.1562916 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562916

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