A buddy of mind is crushing hard on this chick and finally got a date with her. She wanted to bring her friend, so this asshole comes to my place to beg me to help him out since everyone else is studying for exams. I have nothing better to do, I decide to go and help him get laid.

I told him no fatties, but I forgot to define this to him. We go to their place to pick them up and of course, the friend is on the chubby side (not a whale, but still like Amy Schumer-ish). After the fake ass introductions, I anticipate that the girl is already judging me, despite the fact that I literally do not care about her or this "date". I overhear her in another room talking to her friend about how "she cant do this" and "he's not my type". Finally she says "okay". She comes out and the first thing she says to me is "you need to change shirts". It must be stimuli because I immediately responded with "you're fat though". Whoops.

Her eyes start tearing, and the reality now sets in…. I am missing my basketball game for this… oh and my friend still got laid somehow later that night. Happy for him and proud of him for not white knighting to look tough in front of his crush.

But later, he says to me "(Girl) says you should apologize to her friend bro", so I ask him to give me her number and I'll call them. He knows how petty I am so he just says no and lets it go.