I'm in a relationship. Let's just say she's pretty demanding. I put my heart and soul into it when I really can't afford to.
I work in hospitality and allegedly not bad looking. So, on a nightly basis there are married women hitting on me. I also have the old reserve bench of girls showing interest, despite knowing about my relationship - including old friends who have fiances, husbands and whatnot. Their social media shows happy couples, dudes shelling out for holidays and for what? so their wives and girlfriends can cheat on them? Even as the potential beneficiary of their cheating I'm disgusted by this. I'm faithful to my girlfriend, but between her demanding and unappreciative nature and their lack of faith as examples I can't help but see a pattern emerging: the heartlessness and faithlessness and cold calculation on a daily basis, particularly in older girls and women. Girls seem to change men the same way we change jobs.
There are certainly ways I can improve myself, but a lot of my girlfriend's criticisms are totally unfair. I come from a very poor background and have pulled myself up via the military to masters educated and working full time. I'm not shy about hard work. She has her rent and expenses paid by her folks. The tone deafness of her advice it is astounding.
I'm a long time lurker of this sub, but it's become a comforting place to lean into the idea of eventual singledom where I have to admit, I'd have more money and happiness being on my own. I don't hate women. And there are certainly issues that men and women both face, but the idea that women alone face expectations from society when I see on a daily basis, men supporting them while they cheat and play victim, is just disheartening.
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Your second line is a misunderstanding of the male female dynamic. Women don't love you the way you understand love and even if they do love you in their way; their love is in the now and is not to be relied on. They will always criticise (shit test) you regardless of their feelings towards you unless they see you as providing something they need AND they are afraid they may lose you and your resources (material, emotional comfort or status).
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From someone who recently divorced, don't wait like I did. If you are unhappy get the fuck out NOW, right now, today. You are not married so you don't have to worry about alimony etc... try being on your own, I think you will like it a lot more than you realize and you will be amazed how your resources seem to increase overnight.
So go home tell her you need to talk and then do the deed, make it clear you are not kidding and do not back down. She will cry crocodile tears, don't fall for it. One of my biggest regrets is not leaving much sooner, the longer you wait the harder it will be and for fucks sake do not get married.
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