I’d like to offer a short Public Service Announcement for our membership on a topic about which we should all be conscientious and intentional: language. I’m not here to tell you not to use slang and curse when you’re having dinner with the President of Kerplakistan; hopefully you know that by now. Hopefully you also know how to be articulate and charming from practicing Game on people. If not, keep at it. But in this post I’d like instead to address something very particular that has probably crept up some of you without you even realizing it: feminized language constructions.

I spend my days around a pack of betas in the office that do the same things I see a lot of you guys on here (and just about every woman everywhere) doing: using wishy-washy language. Alphas don’t hedge. They don’t use feminized language like “I feel like…” That phrase was popularized by women as a means of diffusing conflict in advance and/or seeming humble about a correct opinion or statement. If it is just a “feeling” then you are not committed to it, you are not being definite, so no one can pin you with being wrong. If you lead a sentence with “I feel like” then you may as well start your sentence with “I really don’t want to offer a definite opinion because I’m unsure of myself.” BETA AS FUCK. Leave that being humble shit to the women. As we so often say on MRP: Own your shit. You’re better to be confident and offer a solid opinion or solution and ultimately be wrong then to pussyfoot around with “I feel like” so that you can’t catch blame. If you are wrong, own that too. There has been a mountain of advice about how to take ownership without offering remorse and apologies. (“Mistakes were made…” etc.)

So be aware of what you are saying and how you are saying it. Part of being a leader is not only making decisions but communicating them with confidence. How you are being perceived in social situations is important for your career, your Game, your life. Remember Law 5: So Much Depends on Reputation – Guard it with your Life. Use of language is one of the primary ways to do so.