It finally clicked.

cholomite · 2016-03-04T13:15:00+00:00

"Do I need to be clean for a massage?"

"No, I can give you a dirty massage"

Smile, grin, wink, smack her ass, whatever. Try to keep it light. It's easier to be outcome independent when you're already starting from a light and playful frame of mind.

Just a thought.

bogeyd6 · 2016-03-04T13:29:50+00:00

You are indeed the master of covert contracts and you need to also hit the chapters relevant in NMMNG. You are not responsible, nor can you make her happy. I challenge you to tease her with a pet peave and hold your frame. Just experiment and try it.

BluepillProfessor · 2016-03-04T16:16:02+00:00

thinking of this guy, and how it turned his marriage around

Think of this: He turned his marriage around by TRULY not giving a fuck.

Don't forget the Cardinal Rule of Relationships per Rollo: Whoever is willing to walk away from the table FIRST has ALL the power. If you are running dread BUT you are not REALLY willing to walk away, guess who still has all the power.

The trick is you don't have to really walk away. You don't have to cheat. You just have to mentally get to the point where you could walk away easier than her. That is when the power shifts in the relationship. THAT is when a woman starts treating you well.

It is the height of cruel irony that a woman's "love" is only given to men who don't need it or want it. Their "love" is still useful, but there is a reason why we use the Red Pill analogy. When you awaken from the expectation of unconditional love it is almost like waking up from the Matrix.

So....Welcome, to the real world.

FlahFlahFlohi · 2016-03-04T11:55:00+00:00

Good, now don't nuke everything by assuming everything is a shit test. And don't do things for her, do them for you. Slowly.

The_Litz · 2016-03-04T12:46:27+00:00

When you offered to give her a massage thinking that sometimes she gets in the mood......

That there. Sex is something that just happens. It is true you set the tone and you game her, but offering a massage hoping for some nookie is as you said, the mother of all covert contracts.

Good if you can recognise this as a mistake. Learn from it and stop making them.

Pussy on the back.....I am now trying to un see that shit in my mind....

Boesman12 · 2016-03-05T01:39:56+00:00

Thanks to all the blue beards comments. What a day today has been. We came home at around half past nine, put the kids to bed and spend some time with the new puppy.

I got in the shower with the idea to sleep early because I'm taking the kids fishing tomorrow. Even though i have severe insomnia tonight was different. I just couldn' t sleep. This is what knowing the matrix feels like. It has been six months since i found MRP and it feels so good to know that the pill is finally down.

It's now three on the morning. I left for a drive just before twelfe. Not so much for dread, but more a feeling that i need to get out and figure out my way forward from now on.

One thing I do know. Yesterday morning I was firm in the believe that we need to have the talk. The one where I threaten divorce and hopefully make her see what she will lose if I fuck off.

Now its a different ball game. Fuck the talk. Well fuck talking altogether. I will continue to improve until she cant ignore the new me. But not for that reason. Not for her. For me alone. To be awesome once more.

No more covert contracts. Either she fucks me when I want to or she doesn't. There are a million available women out there.

I know I am basically repeating my original post, but it is as if I have discovered MRP for the first time.

As BPP said. I dont need a loan, bit of the bank starts insisting I might just take up the offer.

Gonna get dressed for gym now... there is shit to be done.

Bluebale · 2016-03-04T11:56:48+00:00

I have recently swallowed the pill, coming from ~6 times sex last year (baby was born, but not an excuse). This year we have had sex on average three times a week, basically just because I have been initiating more and ignoring the shit tests.

Last week I was offering a massage to my wife, just because she had been complaining that her back hurts. Well, she refused, claiming she was tired. After we got into bed, I initiated again and she complained "I knew that you offered the massage only because you wanted sex". I replied "Why would I need to offer massage to have sex, when I can have sex without massage, as you see" while taking her panties off. She stopped complaining and I finished on her face (second time during our marriage of 7 years). She was very happy and thanked me afterwards, saying that it helped on her pain.

druganswer · 2016-03-04T17:29:43+00:00

First epiphany of many...

Anyway, you signed a paper that basically says you'll only fuck your wife and you expected her to want to fuck you. You were obviously incorrect thinking that this paper meant she would always have desire for you. Now you have to ask yourself if this paper really means anything at all? Or is the whole idea of marriage one huge covert contract. If it's a covert contract that marriage = she will always desire you then why isn't it a covert contract that marriage = you will only fuck her?

Catholic Wedding Vows. "I, , take you, , for my lawful wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part." "I, , take you, , to be my husband/wife.

If she's not having and holding you (the covert contract you're creating) then why would you limit yourself to her? Your own morals can come in and what not here, but most of the time it isn't morals that prevent a man from straying, it's oneitis.

I'm not trying to preach cheating or anything actually... I guess I'm just trying to show you that there are probably a lot of things you have accepted about marriages/relationships without question that you will eventually see differently or at least give second thought.

Then eventually the lightbulb moments won't even be that big... just "Heh, that makes sense, wonder why I didn't think about it that way earlier."

paulwalkr · 2016-03-04T16:46:01+00:00

upvote for self-awareness.

don_pel · 2016-03-04T17:07:52+00:00

Even though I lost weight, and are lifting again.

Man, you need to lift heavy weights. There is juns no way around it.

You need to be strong and look muscular. Otherwise everything is uphill.

LIFT AND GET BIGGER

Title	It finally clicked.
Author	Boesman12
Upvotes	20
Comments	22
Date	March 4, 2016 10:45 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/48wuji/it_finally_clicked/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/it-finally-clicked.200275 https://theredarchive.com/post/200275

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