This is a man trying to vent out for help and in desperate need for someone to talk to
My online friend has helped me through a lot of struggles and has helped me improve my life. And I know her life and relationships and her perception is affected by her trauma. However I know she is hanging around two toxic people who neglect her needs all the time and abuse her in different ways (I’m afraid it can even get physical). And she goes from one extreme of thinking they’re both nothing but nice and helpful and caring and fun to be around. And the next she wants nothing to do with them.
I really have been patient with her for a long time but I know she won’t walk away from either of them, probably ever. And a lot of the time, when I try to make suggestions on how to improve her life and get herself and them some help and treatment, she declines. And it just makes me so frustrated sometimes and wears down on my mental health too.
Before it’s like she made this vow to help me through every step in trying to get my life back and make positive changes. Now she doesn’t make any time for me at all.
She does make time for the two toxic people she lives with…..but not me. She doesn’t contact me for days even a week. And I’m the one who always has to text her and wait for a response. If I try to vent how I feel and the problems I have with our relationship, she either gets confused and asks a bunch of questions, gets distracted with something else, ignores me, or gets really upset and shuts down. And I end up apologizing to her.
So…..yeah most of the time, I keep things to myself. The only time I go to her is for advice because I desperately need it. But even then she’s still too busy and doesn’t make the time for me.
On top of that, she says things like this: “I’m far more accustomed to being pursued, to men making fools of themselves just to get me to ACKNOWLEDGE them, let alone speak...”
She says things like that a lot and of course that triggers the shit out of me. But again it’s how to talk about how I feel without being ignored or being made to look like the bad guy.
So……now, I don’t know if it’s right to walk away or stay like this or not. And even if I do walk away I have no one else to talk to, who can understand my struggles. It is hard for me to reach out to ANYONE.
So, I’m just begging for someone to talk to. Because the only other choice is to remain alone.
And what really gets me is my online friend lead me here and then ended up abandoning me……