On the topic of "Hover hands"

literallyschmiteraly · 2013-06-09T11:16:44+00:00

You are right, it is so unfair. It's like that idiot woman complaining that Seattle men are afraid to ask her out -- but no that's not feminism's fault, it's men's fault.

tyciol · 2013-06-09T18:09:02+00:00

I only learned of the hover hands meme a month or two ago, was kinda hilarious, but yeah, it is just mockery of the socially inadequate, and I'm sure I've done HH myself too.

It's like a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. Touch a girl? You're a molester. Don't touch her? You're a loser.

Of course if you're hot to her, you're sexy/flirtacious if you touch her and out of her league if you don't. All situational to perspective.

UninformedDownVoter · 2013-06-09T20:10:19+00:00

[permanently deleted]

TorontoMike · 2013-06-09T10:49:34+00:00

You are right it is a "No win" situation for them and it is sad , both for them and society , a male teacher or supervisor can never comfort a child because he can be labeled a molester , a man can never take a lost child to find their parents because will be labeled a kidnapper and rapist a murderer . and a boy may not touch a girl in anyway shape or form because she might not find him "up to her standards" or he did not respond the way she liked or any reason under the sun and she just has to scream " EeeEEw that creep touch me , see how he was groping me ! EeeEew what a disgusting pervert , I was almost raped !!" and the girls will run to defend her and chime in on how disgusting he is and white knights will try to beat him up to impress the girls, and know one will take his word for it and will forever be known a the creepy guy who tried to grope little mary rottencrotch at the dance

nigglereddit · 2013-06-09T10:39:38+00:00

It's a very interesting issue.

I'm a designer and photographer, and often do portrait shoots. That basically means that I have to stare intently at people, and more often than not push, pull and touch them to get them posed (they're usually not pro models).

I make a point of saying, "if you're not comfortable being touched by me, just say, get your hands off me creep, I won't be at all offended, I hear it every weekend in nightclubs".

And I've never had a problem. Not once, from a man or a woman. Yet I know at least three other photographers who have had serious problems with female sitters including legal action.

How can this be? Is it my manner? Could it be the fact that I'm married? Why would my female clients be not just happy to be touched by me but actually eager?

It's a mystery isn't it? And we all know that it has nothing, nothing at all, to do with the fact that I'm six foot four, very athletic build and attractive enough to have done some modelling myself, both nude and clothed? That couldn't possibly be a factor, nor could this young man very wisely realise that he might not fall into the automatically immune category that I seem to be in.

Because that would be just horrible.

Synchrotr0n · 2013-06-09T21:20:29+00:00

I don't know why people keep mocking hover hands. I bet that in 90% of the cases the guys were just in their way to touch the girl/woman but the picture was taken before they could finished their move. It makes absolutely no sense to me trying to do a "fake grab" when someone is being photographed with a female person. At least in my case, when I don't know the person very well (which makes umconfortably for me to touch them) I just approach them with my shoulders while having my arms down.

Disorderly-Conduct · 2013-06-09T19:09:03+00:00

There's a study I can't find off hand that says men are much more likely to be nervous or afraid around attractive women than the reverse. Hoverhand is actually strongly influenced by male biology.

MechPlasma · 2013-06-09T10:29:55+00:00

If it wasn't one of the top posts, I'd have said you're overthinking it.

...

Nah, I'll still say you're overthinking it. Most people really don't see that level of timidness as a good thing.

Tamen_ · 2013-06-09T13:08:28+00:00

Not really what is discussed here, but I can't help but wonder how many of the "hover-hands" photos wouldn't be that if they had been taken a quarter of a second later (or earlier)?

2013-06-09T13:41:36+00:00

I don't like touching anyone unless it's myself.

mean0dean0 · 2013-06-11T02:52:42+00:00

There's a hypothesis out there that there's no such thing has "hover hand"--just that the pictures are being taken before the hands in question have reached their destination.

herbandmargie · 2013-06-09T11:53:01+00:00

Direct consequence of shunning positive masculine values in favor of gender neutral gender roles.

2013-06-09T14:15:17+00:00

The only people raggin on this dude are lonely women.

rightsbot · 2013-06-09T09:14:17+00:00

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nmvzciehjfal · 2013-06-10T00:48:04+00:00

It's no different from the idea that men are not supposed to talk to or look directly at women. To feminists, men are an untouchable class and should act as such. Similar to the class structure of India.

fadingthought · 2013-06-09T15:44:06+00:00

I think it has more to do with the wishy-washy stance of it. Either ask and put your arm around them, or don't put your arm around them. The hover hand is just silly.

baskandpurr · 2013-06-10T00:00:00+00:00

I don't let girls touch me, it's not safe.

Clev3r · 2013-06-10T07:25:54+00:00

Personally, I think you're just wrong. I think there is a very large difference between touching someone in a posed picture and touching someone just in conversation.

In pictures, people get close (mostly for the purpose of just fitting in the picture) and naturally end up touching. If a girl initiates touch, as in puts her hand around you, it should be taken as acceptable to do the same to her. This is how I've always approached it, and I've never once felt like I was slightly violating someone or afraid that I wasn't being respectful, it's completely non-sexual, non-violent and totally harmless. Why think into it so much?

Touching outside of posed pictures is an entirely different animal. This can be seen as intrusive or unwarranted and this is where it could get weird. Like if you just casually wrapped your arm around a girl's hips then yes that could be taken the wrong way or whatever. But for a picture? I don't see anything passed people just being awkward.

SteelCrossx · 2013-06-09T13:56:45+00:00

Haha I think hover hand = pussy. We all know why he's doing it and its not because he's being respectful. You're looking way to into this, hover hands are for boys who are too scared to put their arm around a woman. It's pathetic.

Title	On the topic of "Hover hands"
Author	Mrmojoman0
Upvotes	65
Comments	65
Date	June 9, 2013 9:12 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1fz39n/on_the_topic_of_hover_hands/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/on-the-topic-of-hover-hands.1171744 https://theredarchive.com/post/1171744

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