How does gender ideology affect modern dating?

NockerJoe · 2022-09-11T01:33:47+00:00

Trans people are what, like 1% of the population max? They generally aren't going to swing things in a macro scale as much as you'd think.

prizefighterstudent · 2022-09-11T01:53:29+00:00

The only way it affects dating in the West is in regards to people's opinions about it, not the existence of gender minorities themselves (trans, non-binary, whichever). These groups are too small to even make a dent in the dating scene for straight people. I've probably interacted with less than 5 of these people, and I live in a liberal city.

Met some girls who were obsessed with the shit, been with chicks where it didn't come up until months after we hooked up, if at all. Depends on the circles you roll with / how much you're willing to put up with.

poppy_blu · 2022-09-11T04:48:47+00:00

More irony from PPD: a sub full of people overly invested in their gender identity who dislike groups of people overly invested in their gender identity.

Can’t make this shit up.

lewdakuma · 2022-09-11T01:48:08+00:00

re: "less cisgender men and women"

i don't think that offline there are enough trans people to say that there are significantly less cisgender people in the dating pool. the internet gives heightened visibility bc its the only place where a lot of people are safe to present who they are genuinely. trans people also tend to date other lgbtq+ members, from what i've observed from my trans friends. safety and being able to relate to their partner are two major reasons ive been told.

re: "why would anyone choose to be cisgender anyways nowadays"

from my understanding, gender isn't really a choice; transgender people don't choose to be trans, they have a separate brain chemistry than what their societal appointed gender is. whether they chose to transition or not is up to them, however. likewise, cisgender people don't choose being cisgender. we just are. you'd also be remiss if you didn't note that being cisgender is overall easier; trans people may be more free in the dating world, but they also have to deal with high rates of violence, unaccepting/hostile families, workplace discrimination, high medical bills/keeping up with procedures (should they medically transition), etc etc.

(this also doesn't account for the binary transpeople who do their best to adhere to gender roles to experience gender euphoria. if you've been perceived as a man your whole life, you might do more to fit the gender norm of women to have experiences that validate your identity. gender roles don't magically disappear when someone is trans)

still, its not unheard of for trans and cis people to date. if i found the person genuinely attractive and he/they met all of my standards for a partner, then i'd give it a shot. though, i can't fault anyone for having a genital preference, and the trend of people being labeled transphobic for not wanting to have intercourse with incompatible genitals is bizarre to me.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-09-11T08:10:21+00:00

They're an extreme minority of the population, those who undergo a form of transition beyond a simple label change even less so, and many are not mainly in the straight dating pool, the main dynamic discussed here, anyway. So I expect trans people to have little impact. It does raise interesting questions of sexuality and what exactly we're attracted to when we say we're into one gender or another, though. For example, because of my bisexuality, it may be assumed that I was able to be into trans people of any gender by default, but I'm not entirely sure that's the case. Some gay people may only be attracted to trans people of the same sex, or some of the opposite sex, or none at all. It may depend on what transition decisions they have made or will make. I think that further questioning could help us all further explore how our attraction works.

Playful_Art_5364 · 2022-09-11T08:12:00+00:00

It doesn’t. You think dudes care if the girl has “they/them” pronouns and is non binary? He’ll play along but most folks don’t care. No one give a shit.

That’s not even addressing the rounding error. Like that’s 1%. Ever dated a chick with heterochomia (wierd color eyes)? No because you probably never met someone with it.

PaleoPimp · 2022-09-11T14:56:03+00:00

It's a dumb theory that a pedophile came up with..yea it's true.. Look it up... It complicates things and makes zero sense. You're either feminine or masculine, or a combo. It's really that simple.

Same-Elevator566 · 2022-09-11T01:38:58+00:00

Trans people are a rounding error. It's goofy anyone even cares about them at all. They are neck and neck with the blind population and I've never even met a blind bitch before.

Progressives can push for whatever dumb ideological bullshit they want, but until they know how to rewrite the human genome women will want tall dudes with big dicks and men will want women with hourglass figures, big tits and a shaved pussy.

this-is-very · 2022-09-11T01:43:29+00:00

This doesn't matter at all in the long run because these most open people who experiment with gender have lowest birthrates, they will naturally die out and be replaced by more naturally religious people. That's the truth of the world, religion dominates human societies because the non-religious don't want to have babies nearly as much. Now that we have more choices and people are free to be non-conformist this process is exacerbated, selection for super-breeder genes is at all time high, and those people love god.

RocinanteCoffee · 2022-09-11T06:20:34+00:00

It doesn't really impact the dating scene much. Plenty of people will date enbies and some will date those who are trans. Even if you total those two groups it's, what, less than 1% of the population?

MAGA-Latino · 2022-09-11T03:16:01+00:00

I doubt that weird gender ideology is that widespread (or at least I hope not).

It will help normal men if many men (the competition) start taking themselves out of the game. Women don't even like beta males, imagine how much less they'll like men that think they're part female.

Objective_Theory_156 · 2022-09-11T16:09:50+00:00

I’ve dated a few trans people and I can honestly say it didn’t feel different to me at all. Dating trans women in a lesbian context was just like typical lesbianism to me, and I appreciated the way those women often cherished womanhood so deeply because they’ve had to fight for it. I’m definitely on the more nonbinary side of things and but present very feminine (skirts every day, eyeliner, jewelry, etc). But if Im with straight men I make it very clear that I’m not in a straight relationship. I don’t think this bothers them as it often decreases gender roles in our relationships and allows for more open communication without judgement. I do know men who just prefer dating queer women or nonbinary femmes not to fetishize them but because there’s more open dialogue and understanding. The biggest conflict for myself is the way men Im with gender me sometimes. I don’t like being referred to as a beautiful woman, but I don’t mind being told I’m beautiful without the gendered connotation. But that’s more so just a “hey I know you meant that kindly but I’d prefer you address me in this way.” Which even cishet people could apply to pet names they like and don’t like. Overall I think it just frees many people from traditional expectations that might not have served them in the first place.

AutoModerator · 2022-09-10T20:21:26+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

KBPhilosophy · 2022-09-11T02:29:33+00:00

Pretty much none, I don’t think people truly understand how small a subset of the population trans people are - I blame media; and, the fact they are so overrepresented in media actually makes me feel bad for the trans people that just want to take their hormones or whatever and keep it pushing, extreme trans activist have really done way more harm than good for this demographic

https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/trans-adults-united-states/

Gender ideology is actually completely irrelevant to dating for the overwhelming majority of people

ruboyuri · 2022-09-11T03:38:36+00:00

Not much, because the numbers aren’t sufficient

Pilling_it · 2022-09-11T09:27:03+00:00

More people identify, sure, but there's so few overall I'm not sure it evens matter.

I'm turned off by masc features, so probably not. I can spot a trans person a hundred miles away, the hips, face and shoulders feel wrong to me.

EnoughObligation164 · 2022-09-11T13:14:19+00:00

Not entirely sure what "gender ideology" is but I guess I have a general idea..

It’s amazing people are free to be who they truly are now.

Always have been, always will be

Would you be open to dating trans women/men and nonbinary people who are free from cisgender norms?

Date? Nah. Fuck? Hell yeah. But we're all "free from cisgender norms," not just trans people

Why would anyone choose to be cisgender anyway nowadays.

Do you mean like "why would a man choose to act masculine/manly just because he identifies as a male?" If so, then it's basically because he's dumb..

Would I date someone that believes in gender roles? Probably, but I'd be trying to talk some sense into them the whole time lol. People just shouldn't worry about this stupid shit, would save y'all a whooole lot of hassle

Title	How does gender ideology affect modern dating?
Author	MiracleMiIk
Upvotes	2
Comments	26
Date	September 10, 2022 8:21 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/xaz0xn/how_does_gender_ideology_affect_modern_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-does-gender-ideology-affect-modern-dating.1131485 https://theredarchive.com/post/1131485

Comments