Last night while smoking a fat doob I stumbled upon a profound realisation, that Jesus was and remains to this day, the ultimate Chad.

Everyone here knows that religion is more about controlling society than anything else, and if we're running off the idea that women are fundamentally hypergamous, we find that the Church has to find a way to keep girls from slutting it up. So what do they do? They invent the ultimate Chad, the king of Chads, Chad so much that he transcends time and will block your cock from the Roman era.

So, there I was chilling, smoking, philosophising about how I can get casual sex from a religious girl when it hit me. The Church essentially created this mystical, supremely attractive figure, and they've been using him as a Chad so that women wouldn't cheat on their husbands because the Chad that they're subconsciously lusting after is long gone.

You can laugh, whatever, but it's no secret that there are a lot of religious girls that seriously really love Jesus.

  • He is more handsome than you (and note, he didn't even look like this, the Church made him look like that).

  • He is more caring than you.

  • His social status is way higher than yours will ever get close to. He turned water into wine when there was a shit party. When he talks, everyone shuts up and listens. Everyone worships him. He had a huge cult of followers, so like it or not, he was the most alpha man in the world.

  • He has legendary, mythological kino.

  • He was a bad motherfucker, another alpha trait. Everyone wanted to kill Jesus because he was trouncing on their styles. He alpha'd everyone and so the Jews and the Romans had to kill him. He challenged them and they couldn't respond, and more importantly, he did it in a non-violent way, so even bloopers could love him.

https://www.mormon.org/blog/10-characteristics-of-jesus-christ-and-how-to-develop-them

The point is that anything you can do, Jesus could do better. He's literally Chad.

Jesus wasn't the son of god, he was a son of god, just another cat (the best though) preaching the same ideas that have been circulating around the world (mostly in East Asia) for millennia. He was probably an average looking arab dude with short hair, but that doesn't appeal to most girls so they had to Chad him up. These girls are literally growing up and being taught to love this Chad, and I think people are seriously under-estimating just how much they actually do love him.

TRP claims that women are branch-swingers. If Jesus is the Chad then these religious girls already have one hand clenched onto the almighty's holy penis, and so only have one hand left for grabbing onto. At this point, she has her husband, and she also has her Chad, except she can never be with this Chad and so she settles happily with her husband. She can't get another dick because she only has two hands, and what would she hold that dick with? Her mouth? That would make her a slut and everyone would see it, she couldn't even deny it to herself. Two guys is understandable if there's a better guy but when you've got three guys to one girl in the picture then it is in fact a slutty situation.