The "you are automatically siding with the oppressor argument" is a perfect argument to show feminist women will never be ok with male indifference towards women.

Sure this may seem unrelated on the surface. But this same mindset goes into what women say about MGTOW or men decentering women though.

It's so common to hear feminists, and PPD women say that why can't MGTOW men just go their way. Saying they don’t care if men decenter women. Also saying these are the types of men we want to leave women alone anyway. They always have to add that sneak insult. If you truly didn't care, you wouldn't feel the need to add that insult.

But that's not even the ironic and funny part. These are also the same feminists that say that any man who isn't a feminist is automatically siding with the oppressors or doesn’t care about women’s rights.

That brings me back to the title. They will never be ok with men opting out in society. You want to know why. Because their own logic already proves they see male disengagement as a problem.

If a man simply being neutral toward feminism is considered “supporting oppression,” then obviously these people do not actually believe men quietly stepping away is harmless. Their worldview already assumes men have a social obligation toward women. So when men remove themselves from dating, relationships, marriage, validation, or emotional investment, it gets interpreted as hostility instead of indifference.

That’s why I think a lot of the “we don’t care if men go their own way” talk is fake confidence. If they truly did not care, there wouldn’t be this constant need to mock those men afterward. They always have to throw in insults like bitter, unwanted, insecure, misogynistic, lonely, or future incel. People who are genuinely unbothered usually don’t spend that much energy shaming people for leaving.

And this is where the hypocrisy becomes obvious to me. Feminists will say men are not entitled to women, which is true. But at the same time, many of them still act entitled to men’s participation, attention, protection, validation, labor, emotional support, and political loyalty.

So men are supposedly free to walk away, but the second they actually do it, suddenly those men become morally bad people. That contradiction says a lot.

I also notice that when women decenter men, society treats it as empowerment and independence. But when men decenter women, people immediately assume resentment, danger, extremism, or misogyny. The reactions are completely different.

To me, that shows people are more comfortable with men pursuing women than ignoring women altogether. Even negative male attention is still attention. But indifference removes women from the center of certain men’s lives entirely, and I think that’s what really bothers people.

That’s why the “if you’re not helping women, you’re helping oppressors” argument connects perfectly to this topic. Both ideas rely on the assumption that men are socially obligated to prioritize women in some way. Whether it’s activism, dating, emotional support, or validation, there is still an expectation there.

And when some men reject that expectation completely, people suddenly stop acting indifferent. That’s when the insults start. That’s when the moral lectures start. That’s when people start psychoanalyzing men for daring to mentally check out.

Again, I’m not even defending toxic behavior from MGTOW spaces. I’m specifically talking about the contradiction in rhetoric. You cannot simultaneously say “we don’t care if men leave” while also framing male disengagement as socially harmful, misogynistic, or morally suspicious.

If men opting out truly had zero effect on women, then there would be no emotional reaction to it in the first place. The fact that people constantly feel the need to shame disengaged men tells me the indifference is not genuine.

At the end of the day, I think a lot of this comes down to expectations. Society is used to men pursuing women, centering women, impressing women, protecting women, and validating women. So when some men stop participating entirely, it disrupts those expectations. And instead of admitting that bothers them, some people hide behind the claim that they “don’t care” while clearly reacting like they do.