Husband material

party_dragon · 2018-11-25T23:51:09+00:00

Kindness, Patience, Has his shit together and is self-supporting, Has a plan for his life, Marriage-minded (don't waste your time converting a man who doesn't want to be married), Plans dates instead of playing the "I don't know whatever you want to do" game, Has some male friends that he has known for a long time, Solid relationship with his mom.

artemis286 · 2018-11-26T00:19:41+00:00

Patience and kindness as well. Everyone has weak moments and struggles, but I would never spend my life walking on egg shells around a aggressive temper. Strong work ethic, marriage and family minded, and enjoying children are all big ones for me.

Lastly, communication. I've seen marriages where either spouse (or both) did not have ANY positive communication skills, and it was a very tough and long road. I expected the men that I dated to have some basic communication skills. To be able to calmly express their thoughts, and work through a tense situation without acting like children. We all get better with time, but someone who refuses to communicate in a healthy and constructive way isn't worth anyone's time, in my opinion.

It's one of my favorite traits about my husband. He wasn't a child who needed to be taught how to communicate, he was already quite good at it. And as a result, we've never raised our voices at each other our entire marriage. We've had disagreements surely, but we've always been able to talk through them. No one has ever given the cold shoulder, or erupted into anger.

Zegiknie · 2018-11-26T12:20:44+00:00

Patience, honor, self-control. Not talking about these, but showing them.

Is he relaxed and fun during a traffic jam? If no, terrible dad, because kids try your patience much more than slow driving.

Does he return to the store if he forgot to pay for an item? That man won't likely cheat on you.

Does he casually pick up trash on a hike? For gods sake breed with him, the world will be a better place.

How does he deal with your tears or sickness? Do you want this treatment when you're in an even worse state? Bad things will happen, is he the one you want by your side when life hits hardest?

Do his manners suffer much when he is exhausted or in pain? Again: life will bring worse troubles, and you will have to live with him.

If a friend is moving houses, does he (offer to) come over to help? Does he take in family and friends who fall on hard times? Important to know if you want to help out your family as they age.

How does he react to dangers? Does he run up shrieking at the sight of a wasp? If he has guns, does he know first aid?

Is he handy? Not a dealbreaker maybe, but dead useful. Is he quick about fixing things around his house?

Does he talk a lot about family or actually treat the family he already has right?

Does he own up to his mistakes and make genuine apologies?

Theendisnearornot · 2018-11-26T01:00:56+00:00

Responsible (has a reliable job and has been there a while), doesn’t constantly make excuses for himself, has long-ish term plans but flexible if something changes out of his control, good with kids & animals (especially if you want kids one day!), decent hygiene, treats elderly people with kindness not disdain. For me personally - good sense of humor (especially when things don’t go as planned), a gentleman (opening doors, letting me go first through the door, etc), offering to pay for dates (or at least if you’re splitting it he has the funds to do so).

eimat · 2018-11-26T04:11:17+00:00

If you want kids, see how he acts around kids. If he is at ease and treats them like fellow humans that are simply shorter, or even better, makes an effort to include them in the conversation and general goings-on, that's a great green flag.

Sharp_Permission · 2018-11-26T08:09:38+00:00

Personally, I prefer hardworking men. This can be expressed in a variety of ways. Of course patience, kindness, and intelligence are always a plus.

If a man possesses the capability to create something I find that to be admirable, same goes for those who arent necessarily handy but have other skills - conversationalists, intellectuals, or the occasional oddball. They should also be family oriented and interested in self improvement.

paillied · 2018-11-26T07:09:09+00:00

I found this post by u/kittxxn particularly helpful! I identified strongly with all the points she made mention of in her main post and refer to it regularly. Some comments are helpful as well!

https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/9e4x9d/what_i_look_for_in_a_man_husband_material/?st=JOXZAEPA&sh=16e3e59c

Andi0401 · 2018-11-26T22:10:23+00:00

Kindness, patience, and the ability to remain calm in chaotic situations.

elizabethrosesz · 2018-11-27T02:47:12+00:00

This may sound broad, but I value a sense of humor over everything. In my experience, witticism and cleverness closely correlates with their intelligence. A mean sense of humor (and overly sarcastic) usually means they are pessimistic. And a man who reacts to a joke with anger (unless it's blatantly making fun of him) is telling as well.

I find that I'm attracted to the kind of man who can dish a joke just as well as he can take it. You've got to be able to laugh at yourself! :)

mythrowawayletsplay · 2018-12-03T21:51:09+00:00

Why are you all so hell bent on marriage? There are lots of women who have no interest in marriage. Why is that a bad thing? Isn't a stronger commitment one that isn't safe guarded by mutually assured destruction ie. Divorce?

Title	Husband material
Author	merel--
Upvotes	40
Comments	30
Date	November 25, 2018 11:35 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/a0dpxu/husband_material/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/husband-material.67885 https://theredarchive.com/post/67885

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