Need advice on getting him to commit and propose

MajorEntertainment65 · 2026-07-14T16:08:58+00:00

I highly suggest you find things other than his money that you like about him. You can also try to actually listen to his wants and needs, like if he says 2027, trying to hurry up a proposal by months or a year at the most is only going to make him resentful and hurt you didn't listen.

I'm so so so so so so so so sick of seeing women in RPW acting like marriage is a get rich quick scheme. I am all for providers, stability, etc but golly girls there is more to a man than his wallet. Get a grip.

chamomilecloud · 2026-07-13T21:38:34+00:00

He gave you a timeline already. What do you think will happen if you rush him? If you press the issue in order to force him, it will come off like nagging. If being engaged is important to you before moving in, then tell him that. But don't phrase it like, "Propose earlier because that's the only way I'll move in with you."

If he is as good of a leader as you say he is, he will follow through with his timeline to propose to you.

Consider that he may want time to make it special for you. Either saving up for the ring, the method to propose, or both.

ChristisKing77777771 · 2026-07-13T21:27:25+00:00

Just wait till 2027

blushingoleander · 2026-07-14T11:03:28+00:00

2 months ago you were disconnected, not having enough sex and he was thinking of breaking up. Is it that or his high income that are making you desperate for a proposal?

Is he even happy with you again? It hasn't been very long for you to change and him to assess that since your last posts.

There is no forcing your way into a good relationship but forcing a proposal is a good way to build resentment into the marriage from day one.

Wife_and_Mama · 2026-07-14T12:16:59+00:00

In The Manchurian Candidate, communists brainwashed him. In Get Out, it was hypnosis. Brave New World used mind-altering drugs to keep everyone docile. If those are too simple, maybe try hooking him up to a giant fantasy world like in the Matrix.

craftyexplorer9 · 2026-07-13T21:27:53+00:00

With all due respect, you guys are very young so I can understand how within the next 6-12 months feels far away but that’s a pretty solid timeline!

I would recommend not moving in until you are engaged and tell him you’re not comfortable moving in until you are engaged

oooKenshiooo · 2026-07-18T09:32:50+00:00

Guy here.

The exact attitude you have right now is proposal cryptonite.

For any masculine men, their primary love language is acts of service.

However, if you are the type of person who NEEDS things to happen on their terms...

Then commiting acts of service feels hollow.

It feels like... i am gifting you a 100k - but you feel like I already owe you 100k.

Giving you that gift would not put you in a good place.

It would barely put us at zero.

MajorEntertainment65 · 2026-07-18T20:27:56+00:00

This update is great and it is good that you are so receptive. We can't control others but we can have a say in how we act ourselves.

EduStorm246 · 2026-07-13T22:22:34+00:00

To me, the wording of the question, especially the part "REALLY want to lock him down as he is a very successful provider" sounds at odds with the marriage vows "for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish".
Maybe the boyfriend is not sure if this marriage is the right thing for him, and is waiting it out for more data points. I'm not seeing what OP brings to the relationship.

Luscious-Grass · 2026-07-19T17:38:18+00:00

You are not ready to get married if you think it’s in any way reasonable or conceivable to force the person you are marrying to do anything.

He is showing you who he is and how he shows up. Pay attention to that, and get the dollar signs out of your eyes.

The only option you have is to vulnerably tell him your fears about moving in with him before a proposal and see how he responds to that.

No-Ad8127 · 2026-07-18T19:56:21+00:00

I’ve read your edit and I’m happy that you decided to get help. So I’ll just keep it short.

Men like your boyfriend are not incentivized to get married by default. He has the job, he has the money, and I’m guessing he has the looks too. He can pick any woman he wants and he can also drop any woman who gives him a hard time like a hot potato. Basically, he is in control of this relationship and any attempts from you to change that won’t go in your favor, even if you’re married.

You’ve realized that your behavior needs to change to accommodate him, and that’s good. I only hope that this is what you want in the long term.

emerald_e · 2026-07-13T22:20:38+00:00

Absolutely do not move in with him!! You don't give wife privileges to a boyfriend.

If he said early 2027 and you trust his leadership, I would sit on your hands and wait till then, frustrating as it is. I wouldn't nag, although in the conversation about (not) moving in together, I'd try to gently remind him that you're taking him at his word on the timeline.

AutoModerator · 2026-07-13T21:18:51+00:00

Title: Need advice on getting him to commit and propose

Author pkavsb

Full text: Hi all, I (26F) and bf (26M) have been dating for 1.5 years. I am ready to get married. I REALLY want to lock him down as he is a very successful provider and leads me masculinely in all the ways I want in our relationship. I want to get him to propose as soon as possible. Tips on how to do this? Or ways I can somewhat force him to propose?

I've asked him about proposing and he says early 2027. I don't want to wait this long especially since he wants me to move in at the end of 2026.

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cookiez2 · 2026-07-22T10:18:47+00:00

Hmmm it just feels you’re forcing him , if he is not mentioning it maybe he’s not wanting to marry you. It should come naturally, because they want to , or in discussions but not forced

I feel either you talk to him on what your future plans may be since it doesn’t seem his is marriage

NewMind_1847 · 2026-08-03T16:01:32+00:00

Why do you want to be with someone you have to convince to marry you at a certain time ? Think about this. Be rational, why would you want to persuade a man to marry you. Why not focus on getting your money up and taking care of your mind and body.

Soyatina · 2026-07-17T22:47:23+00:00

Go check out /r/Waiting_To_Wed and read the stories on there.

AURORA_BLONDE · 2026-07-14T17:57:07+00:00

Sorry you’re going through this what is your timeline what are you wanting to happen ? I want to encourage you to really think about what you want. A relationship is two people . You can have expectations yourself . I don’t really understand anymore why is everyone waiting for him to decide everything . We want the man to be the man but care about what matters to us. Compromise and communication is key here . Do you get along with his mother ? If you do can you tell her you want a family and children? Is he close with her ? Moms have a lot of influence on their sons . And I know mothers want grandchildren . It’s a thing . If you’re looking to have a family expect a proposal and ring before you move in share that with his mom she will understand . You don’t need to tell her he is a good provider . Just let her know the reasons why you love him and want this so much . I think with her help you might be able to get where you want to go . Also tell him . Also it took a while to find the ring I wanted . Start looking for styles you like . I think sitting down with him and saying this is so very important to me . Before I move in If he loves you he will be understanding and compromise more on timeline . Your feeling matter. if he keeps putting you off well you have your answer and let him know you don’t want to waste time . It’s actually healthy to have children before age 30 .

Title	Need advice on getting him to commit and propose
Author	pkavsb
Upvotes	11
Comments	40
Date	July 13, 2026 9:18 PM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1uvom1k/need_advice_on_getting_him_to_commit_and_propose/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/need-advice-on-getting-him-to-commit-and-propose.1584976 https://theredarchive.com/post/1584976

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