First forgive my french as your langage isn't my native one. I live in Paris.

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I lost my virginity right after my 24 birthday, with this one girl I thought was the perfect one for me.

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I had strong oneitis and despite all the red flags that I'm now aware of, I stayed TEN FUCKING YEARS with this bitch, right until she left me for another dude she was fucking when we were still together.

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During this ten years, I always have been in charge of her entertainement. I provided very well in this area. Buying her vacation all around the world and tickets for various show, and concert. Sex was OK for the first few month, but meh, I had no fucking experience, and I knew I wasn't really good at it. In fact she was always initiating it, because I wasn't often horny enough. I was hooked on porn anyway... And I was fat for the most part of the LTR, my testerone level was probably low. At one point I started runing and losing fat, I even ran a marathon. Her interest in sex and her happiness somehow spiked at that point. Two years later I stoped and begin building fat again.

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Begining of 2017 her grand father died. I provided an emotional support because I thought I was supposed to.

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After the vacation I provided to her this same year I noticed she was gradually happier and I thought that was the grief of the elder death that was fading away. She would talk a lot about some dude at work. Telling me stories I didn't really cared about. I was ignoring the most part.

He came once to our flat with some fatty girls from her work. I noticed how she looked at him but choose to ignore what my gut was telling me.

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Then he came another time to my flat. I wasn't notified until he and the fatty coworkers were here, it was late at night, they were drunk from an after work party. She probably fucked him in while I was sleeping cause she joined me in bed at 5 am and claimed she simply fell asleep.

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During the breakup process she claimed that she was still in love with me. She told me she's been bored, and I played to much video games (that was right btw), that we weren't doing to much activity together. She was basically blaming me for the breakup. She didn't mentionned that other guy at her work, but finally my gut talked to me loud enough.

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So I wrote her a big beta letter, telling her she could leave if she was honnest and tells me it was because their was another guy. She answered it was because of him. She then told me again she was in love with me and suggested that somehow we could still be together in some sort of a polyamory agreement. I was bluepill but aware enough to detect this situation was full of shit.

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Two weeks after the breakup, I told her she could come to the flat to get some of her stuff back while I was out of town. She went there with him, fucked him in my bed, then leave and took none of her stuff.

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When I confronted her, saying how disrespectful that was, she claimed that her comfort went down since the breakup and that I couldn't really understand.

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So I've slept with one girl in my entire life. And I'm pretty devastated at that time.

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And then I discovered this sub. It was 6 months ago. Since then my focus went entirely to improving myself.

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So I started :

- Eating well

- Runing again

- Lifting

- Reading self-improvement books

- Meditating

- Absorbing everything from the sidebar and reading this sub daily

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Somehow I know I'm in a worse spot that many contributers or readers here that are still very young. The thing is, I'm not yet at my supposed SMV peak. Which is around 36-38 Rollo says. I didn't break the dry spell yet but I noticed I gather more attention from women, even younger one. I'm very aware of the redpill truth all the time. And I think my game isn't really that bad. My SMV was just really low, I was probably a 2. Now I think I'm a 6, and I'm confident I'll peak at 8 in the next few months.

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So to all of you first, thank you, and then, if you're in your twenties, you're fucking blessed.