It seems counter-intuitive advice: don't lean on your woman with problems. Everywhere you go, you hear advice about how you should talk about your problems with her. Seemingly alpha guys will say, "I couldn't have done it without her. She was there for me through the hard times, etc."

How is it possible that she helps you through the hard times even without you leaning on her?

Think of it this way. You have a six-year-old child. You lose your job. Are you going to lean on your child for support at that point? No. If the child found out, you would frame it in a patriarchal way:

"Don't worry. This happens all the time to people. It's a normal part of life. Bad things happen to everyone. Daddy is going to find a job soon because he's good at things."

You want to do the same with women. When you do this, when you frame your situation in a positive, powerful way, you feel more powerful. When you tell her you feel like a loser, you feel even more like a loser. But if you tell her that you've had setbacks before and you'll come back, you start to believe it. That's how she helps you.

If you need to lean on someone, lean on your friends. Or if the burden is so great that you'll drive your friends away, get therapy.