Need to fix insomnia

jerry_rigger · 2015-08-28T07:52:14+00:00

I too suffer from insomnia.

Things that help me:

Being physically active regularly. My job isn't too physically demanding so gotta burn off excess energy. Hard exercise, walking, hiking, swimming, fucking, etc.

Last call for caffeine is 3pm for me on weeknights.

No screen time 1-2 hours before bed. Read a book instead.

Learn to meditate or learn yoga if your too twitchy. I was never able to sit a meditate until after I learned some yoga.

To fall a sleep I usually have to basically meditate until I knock out. If I don't my brain runs a mile a fucking minute. I have to force my body to relax through controlled breathing while also focusing on slowing down my mind.

Valerian root. It's natural. Look into it.

You may need to see a counselor, it may help I don't know. I'd try all the other shit I suggested first as its cheaper.

And as for marriage counseling I say, "FUCK THAT SHIT IN THE ASS WITH A DONKEY DICK USING BROKEN GLASS, GRAVEL, AND HOT SAUCE AS LUBE!!!" I went through some of that shit and to me it was more "Build a Better Beta" and "Beta Assimilation" courses. I'm not sure if they're all like that. YMMV. But that was my experience with that shit.

6TimesDown7TimesUp · 2015-08-28T11:50:26+00:00

Sounds like you're under a lot of stress. /u/strategeos_autokrator's posts on stoicism helped me a lot. Used to get mad insomnia years ago. Melatonin (I use a liquid form from Life Extension) and l-theanine have been life changers in terms of helping me get to sleep and stay asleep. ZMA helps too (zinc, magnesium, and B6 combo I think). Everything else a previous poster said about limiting caffeine late in the day etc is spot on. Good luck.

The_Litz · 2015-08-28T13:36:09+00:00

I could almost have written this post!

I made a balls up at work because of lack of sleep. I knew I would get a disciplinary hearing if it came out. So to cover my ass I called our company wellness provider and they set me up with a counselor. In our company if you are stressed the company takes care of you, or used to when the financials were a bit healthier.

The counselor helped with the stress. She said she is not going to do couples counseling as she is only contacted to treat my stress, even if it is directly related to my marriage. To tell the truth she was the one which put me on the path of not trying to seek acceptance from my wife. But that is a story for another day.

The other option is to just say you have a problem with alcohol, then they take you off the job for 2 weeks and send you to wineschool (rehab).

I am not saying you must use this, but keep it in mind if you are in danger of loosing your job.

If I work out I fall asleep really early, sometimes even as early as 19h00! Then I am up at 02h00.

If I go to bed at 22h00 I am up at 03h00.

I have to stay up late to sleep through to 06h00.

What works for me is to go to bed at about 23h30 and sleep untill about 07h00 - 07h30. Not possible really seeing I start work at 07h30!

What helps is all the usual advice on sleep hygiene. It does not cure insomnia for me but helps a lot. I am not too fond of sleeping tablets either.

irateMD · 2015-08-28T14:03:51+00:00

Sleep is pretty complicated - you're unlikely to pin down the solution without some knowledge and insight.

If you've got anxiety or another problem that's keeping your hamster wheel turning, then deal with that first. Sometimes it's obsessing about sleep that keeps you awake. Cognitive behavioral therapy would be good here. This isn't couples counseling, it's learning to modify your thought processes. Meditation has variable effects - you'll be relaxed, but the intense focus can actually keep some people awake.
Read about sleep hygiene stuff like what was mentioned by /u/jerry_rigger. I would cut off caffeine even earlier at first. Get rid of alcohol. Don't use Xanax, melatonin, valerian, or any other sleeping pill more than 3 nights per week.
Nutrition, especially foods high in minerals like iron, magnesium, potassium. Take vitamin D.
Try to get your lifting and cardio done at least 3 hours before bedtime. You may need to add daily cardio in the mornings, especially if you can only lift in the evening.
Sort out everything above. If you're still stuck, then see a sleep specialist.

chief_slap_ahoe · 2015-08-28T09:19:19+00:00

4-5 hrs a night for the last 3 years. Doesn't matter what I do.

itstartstoday123 · 2015-08-28T15:01:31+00:00

I had bouts with insomnia for about a decade. I started drinking Calcium magnesium powder mixed with water. Once in the morning and once at night before bed and haven't had an issue in 2 years.

It's not a one size fits all sort of sleep fix but it sure calms the nerves.

I also did a big detox centered around kombucha tea right about that time.

enfier · 2015-08-28T22:35:43+00:00

I think if I go to a shrink or sth they will want to involve my wife and do couples counseling

That's a bullshit reason not to go to counseling. If you go to a counselor, they aren't going to ask you to do any couples therapy bullshit. They'll work on the problems you are having, nothing more. If they want to see your wife, tell them no. It's not that hard. If you are paying for it, you get to pick the counselor. Don't pick one that screams SJW.

There are plenty of websites out there with tips for reducing insomnia. Some of them (such as cutting out caffeine entirely) are going to be necessary steps in coming to a diagnosis of insomnia. I'd recommend you follow all the tips, try it for a few weeks and then go see your doctor if it doesn't work.

You need to be seeking medical attention for this. If this becomes a problem that prevents you from performing at your job, you need to be able to show records that you have a medical problem and have been seeking help. While insomnia or stress may not be grounds for keeping your job or claiming a disability, it may encourage an employer to give you some time off to get back to healthy. It may also have an impact if you are fired and need to claim unemployment.

chief_slap_ahoe · 2015-08-29T09:56:12+00:00

My problem isn't falling asleep. I can fall asleep in minutes. But once the 4-5 hour mark hits I'm awake. I mean I can lay in bed for hours and hours but I will not go back to sleep.

Sepean · 2015-08-30T18:19:21+00:00

I had a lot of troubles sleeping due to stress some years ago while I had to function at a high level during work too.

benzos work very well. Addiction is an issue, and the fear of not sleeping compounds it. On the plus side, only taking it once a day before sleep should lessen the addiction and I personally was able to quit them without that much difficulty (I am also very good at sticking to diets and I quit smoking so I think I have an easier time than most). Note that benzo abstinence feels exactly like stress; it is important that you know this so you don't confuse the symptoms when trying to quit.
melatonin gave me 1 hour extra sleep per night, is over the counter and there are practically no health risks. After using it regularly for years now I get nightmares when I take them though.
lifting doesn't help with sleeping that much. Try BJJ, MMA, wrestling or something like that, it drains you on a whole other level and it occupies your mind too. Or at least HIIT or some other activity that really drains you. You shouldn't lift every day anyway.
avoid computer and tablet/smartphone screens late in the day. The light frequency triggers wakefullness.
don't try to sleep unless you're tired. Don't toss and turn, read a book instead until you're tired and ready to sleep. This goes for when you wake up at night too. You will worry 10x worse if you just lie there and this will keep you awake for hours.
don't drink coffee or cola from late afternoon.
I was past my stress-related depression at the time I found stoicism, but negative visualisation is great at reducing worry and I think it would have helped me a great deal.
naps are tough. Use an alarm to keep naps short if early in the day. Avoid late night naps and find a routine for it, like taking a walk, playing games, or watching tv standing up.
do stuff that occupies your mind. For example certain types of computer games have you considering builds, strategies and such. MMA also helped me, I'd be visualizing moves and counters. This is great for keeping your mind on something non-worrying during quiet moments and when trying to sleep. Find something that engages you mentally.
if you are sleep deprived and need to work, modafinil is awesome. It will give you laserlike focus for hours and hours no matter how you slept and no euphoria or anything else.

mistaken4alpha · 2015-08-28T08:08:47+00:00

Have you had your hormones (thyroid, testosterone), blood sugar (A1C), and liver numbers checked recently?

xjedimindx · 2015-08-28T13:37:34+00:00

I exercise and take 10 to 15 mg of melatonin. It seems to make me sleep. When I would go out of town to work I couldn't sleep for 2-3 nights in a row being in work camp. Taking melatonin seemed to help a lot.

Countpudyoola · 2015-08-28T14:28:13+00:00

Have you cut out all caffeine?

BluepillProfessor · 2015-08-28T21:06:47+00:00

IMHO there is nothing wrong with taking Ambien at night for a few weeks to get you through a rough spot. I wouldn't take Benzos like Xanax during the day because...addiction.

You don't need to see a shrink but you do need to see your regular doctor or get a script from Doctor buddy.

helps_using_paradox · 2015-08-29T18:05:01+00:00

When you go to lay down tonight, I want you to force yourself to stay awake. If you go to bed and should find yourself drifting to sleep, you must fight this urge. I believe there is something your body wants to tell you, but because you are focusing on trying to sleep you are missing out on it.

Lay in bed
If you are not sleep within 15 minutes, get up and do some strenuous activity around the house (I recommend scrubbing floors with a toothbrush and making sure to get every inch)
No matter how sleepy you feel yourself getting, you must force yourself to stay awake.

Edit: Two things happened. You either got really mad at this post or you laughed. If you try this and it works, I will tell you how it worked. I promise you it will work, but you must promise me that you will do it.

Slight Spoiler: The reason you cant get to sleep is the same reason you are dissatisfied with your sexual life. You are using the same problem solving mechanism in attempting to get to sleep as you are with your wife and sex.

Title	Need to fix insomnia
Author	it_is_not_the_spoon
Upvotes	5
Comments	17
Date	August 28, 2015 6:10 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/3ip21d/need_to_fix_insomnia/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/need-to-fix-insomnia.208136 https://theredarchive.com/post/208136

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