Asking plates for feedback when they break?

ComplexProjection · 2020-09-04T10:33:31+00:00

She gave you honest feedback. She does not want to be FWB. You didn't committed, she removed you. How can it be clearer?

Bear-With-Bit · 2020-09-04T09:48:54+00:00

Asking women for feedback is like asking an air traffic controller when you're the pilot. They only know what looks right or wrong, but they don't know how to fly a plane.

UEMcGill · 2020-09-04T11:29:28+00:00

They always tell you before, you just have to be observant enough to see what's going on. Read Rollo's article on killing the puppy. Women don't tell you what they are thinking or doing per se, their actions always do.

Her actions were pretty clear. She was getting banged then she threw out a comfort test ( I don't.. I'm not looking for). When you did the exact opposite of what you need for a comfort test, the plate broke. The feedback was, you handled what may have been a comfort test poorly, so she didn't come around. The medium is the message

BestVersionOfMyself_ · 2020-09-04T08:45:26+00:00

I don't think you can rely on any woman's speech. She will tell you a version which is acceptable by society. She would never tell you your flaws.

Protocol_Apollo · 2020-09-04T10:14:28+00:00

Look up closure is bullshit.

Even for broken plates, they’ll never really be honest about why they stopped fucking you.

RevolutionaryPea7 · 2020-09-04T11:31:09+00:00

No. Jesus Christ no...

This is one of those times you need to remember that women are not like men. Your male brain is like "if I solicit criticism on my performance, I can use that to improve". If this was business between gentlemen it would be a really good idea and you'd be on the path to success. But this isn't between gentlemen. Women don't work that way. All you'll do is feed her ego, make you seem more desperate and you won't learn a single thing because you should never listen to what women say.

All you need to remember here is you fucked her. The only feedback you needed from her was whether her legs were open or closed, and you got it. Whatever comes out of her mouth is irrelevant.

PlusTenStrength · 2020-09-04T08:55:12+00:00

Nah just move on. Most of the time it’s based on fleeting emotion and out of your control. Chalk it up to the game.

Ducthadon · 2020-09-04T10:06:37+00:00

So I went no contact on her for 2 weeks, hit her up again and that’s where she removed me.

That only works when they hit you back not the other way round, sidebar dude.

Also asking for feedback for what exactly? What is the purpose of a plate again? Sounds like you've been hit with scarcity, again sidebar dude.

itiswr1tten · 2020-09-04T14:08:09+00:00

Look OP, I feel your sincerety. So I'll be real with you. Read these words a few times, trust me.

A man's life isn't about searching for answers.

Outside of mathematics, there aren't many simple truths. Many things are morphing, all the time.

So let's take this girl. She said no, I don't want to do casual. That's an invite for further investment. A thinly veiled demand, in fact.

You said no. Flat out no.

So she goes away. Then you hit her up for sex after ignoring her for 2 weeks.

Maybe she thought she couldn't resist.

Maybe she hates you.

Maybe you should really be asking yourself, why did I post this thread?

Was I thinking I'd get the "answer"? Am I treating women like job interviews, to corporatize and wash away the humanity of the interaction?

Tough to say. But....

A man's life isn't searching for answers. It's deciding what to do and going in that direction.

Choose your direction and go.

omega_dawg93 · 2020-09-04T12:43:58+00:00

2 points:

imo, 90% of the women you'll meet and fuck in life will bring-up the question, "what does having all this sex men... to US?" some will call it a shit test, but to me, it's a half shit test bc at some point, it's not about her comfort, it's about her wanting to adhere to her schedule (kids, marriage, getting beyond pump & dump action). note: ALL women keep a 'life' schedule.
if #1 isn't the issue, i.e., she's still in her, "girls just wanna have fun" mode, it was a true comfort test, and you fucked up twice: first, if you were fucking her... and FUCKING HER WELL, you ignore this test and she does NOT refuse your sexual advances. second, you don't contact her and solicit her opinion about anything. women are covert communicators... her actions will tell you where she's at.

about #2... the biggest 'secret' in the game is LEARNING female communication modes and predicting her behavior based on what she's DOING and not what she's saying. when you get good at this, women will respond to you in a much more favorable way... bc logic and direct communication is NOT their standard m.o.

example: when i do something my girl doesn't like, her body language and LACK of facial expressions while we're talking tells me LONG before she mentions the issue. my response: i keep doing what i'm doing... i don't change anything except to pull back my attention & time with her. her usual response: do whatever the hell she has to do to get me back in line with what she expects in terms of time, energy, and attention.

she knows she doesn't have to be with me... but if she is, she's going to be with me how i want her in my life... and not on her petty bullshit based on fleeting feelings that change every 30 min.

Mindful_Stoic81 · 2020-09-04T12:21:50+00:00

The medium is the message, you never ask women for their feedback, it will take you nowhere.

Never listen to what they say, rather watch what they do (Or get better at it). Even if you ask them, women are incapable of explaining clearly to you why they do what they do and you will always end up falling in their frame by doing so, by showing that you care.

I don't know the nature of your relationship, but it probably has to do with her perception of you, being not alpha enough (Alpha fucks) in order for her to accept the terms of a plate or fuck buddy relationship.

Women always make rules for betas, and break them for alphas. She probably labelled you as beta in this case. You walking away didn't change her perception of you since she already labelled you as beta at a certain stage of the relationship.

SoA_MC · 2020-09-04T10:54:56+00:00

It was a shit test. If you didn’t reach out, she would’ve contacted you sooner or later at which point you could’ve just set up another date and picked up where you left off.

Because you reached out, she knows she’s in your head, she removed you on social media to see if you notice and say anything about it.

letmereadthatshit · 2020-09-04T11:18:09+00:00

Hahah do ask it's kinda funny. After every broken plate call them or send a message professionally , asking for a rating and feedback.

redhawkes · 2020-09-04T18:21:46+00:00

That's the scarcity in you talking. Ignore and gftow.

IXseed · 2020-09-04T14:53:31+00:00

Don't. Because honestly, girls aren't gonna know a fair amount of the time, either.

That one plate you talked about. Most likely you were doing something in the relationship that gave her the idea that you would wanna do something more official OR she just wanted a relationship. Who knows?

SmokedGoy336 · 2020-09-04T18:13:38+00:00

I have before in some cases where the girl was more reasonable than most and the answer wasn’t obvious. It’s generally a waste of time.

In this case, she’s already told you why.

cfbovernfl · 2020-09-04T19:23:22+00:00

She was pretty clear with you, I don't know what else you're looking for. If you've been with enough women and read the sidebar, I think you should have a good grasp of things you do wrong in general. You don't ask them, because they usually won't tell the truth.

Garathon · 2020-09-04T13:12:09+00:00

Dude, you broke the plate yourself. Did the exact wrong thing for a comfort test.

nateydanger · 2020-09-04T13:40:31+00:00

Never ask a deer how they like to be hunted.

You fucked her for a good month, she said "I don't want FWB I want a relationship" and you IDGAF'd right out of there. Then you didn't talk to her for 2 weeks and then she removed you. Now you are shocked? You self described her as a plate and you got what you wanted. Where's the issue? If you are living the Red Pill Plate Mentality whats the next step?

On to the next one.

Lord-of-Circles · 2020-09-04T13:45:32+00:00

There's a Fear-based mindset in the market because of the virus and bad economy. There's more K-selection and partnering-up in LTRs going on now.

DrunkOldBear · 2020-09-04T13:47:58+00:00

It's not you, it's her. There you are.

redpill-professor · 2020-09-04T14:00:04+00:00

Go by a woman's actions and never by her words.

She made it clear she wanted more than FWB's. You left early and didn't contact her for 2 weeks. Then you hit her up again and you're surprised she still doesn't want FWB's?

Aspanu24 · 2020-09-04T14:12:37+00:00

Sounds like you lost your bluff. You went back, making you look weak

theredsperg · 2020-09-05T14:36:27+00:00

she isnt giving you a fuck no more.

move on

redhorndog · 2020-09-04T08:44:14+00:00

[deleted]

Title	Asking plates for feedback when they break?
Author	ExcellentItem
Upvotes	31
Comments	39
Date	September 4, 2020 8:14 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/imc4mz/asking_plates_for_feedback_when_they_break/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/asking-plates-for-feedback-when-they-break.211535 https://theredarchive.com/post/211535

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