Tinder, is it just a numbers game?

constipulouspoon · 2020-10-29T16:00:29+00:00

A lot of women just sort of use Tinder like a drug when they are horny or bored and when they get their fix they toss it and unmatch with the dudes they were fucking around with. You ever seen a cat temporarily in heat? They will be all over you and super physical etc and then suddenly they snap out of it and it's like they have no idea who you are almost ashamed even and they run off to do something else. It's the same thing. It's possible to be successful with Tinder you just have to grind it out. I honestly just use it as a tool to fill time when I can't get out and game in real life.

WRXLad555 · 2020-10-29T18:15:05+00:00

Don't waste your time on that garbage.

As you said, its a validation tool and a way for women to get a quick fuck. Unless you're in the top 10%, forget Tinder altogether.

The 'old school' dating sites where you have to pay are better as they attract a more serious and mature clientele.

lobstesbucko · 2020-10-29T18:07:00+00:00

Its absolutely a numbers game. Im a 6 foot tall, athletic young guy, and good looking enough that I've been paid to model before. When I used tinder I had maybe a 5% match rate for girls I swiped on that I was actually attracted to, and even when I was swiping on everyone I barely got more matches. And out of that 5%, barely anyone actually responded to my messages. But once I actually did get a conversation going, it was pretty much a done deal and my success rate was great. Which means a whole ton of girls are just there for validation that guys find them attractive, but if you're willing to play the numbers game you'll be fine.

A girl I'm friends with didnt believe me when I told her how skewed tinder was in women's favour. So I told her we could switch tinders for a bit and see how it was. She's kinda cute I guess, but absolutely nothing special, and I'd certainly say I'm much more physically attractive than she is. When I swiped on her account I matched with EVERY. SINGLE. GUY. It was about 50 matches in a row. When she swiped on mine she got nothing at all. She couldn't believe it. She said it made her feel depressed. But that's reality

hqckbjpxhtbvpqfw · 2020-10-29T18:00:09+00:00

It's a numbers game if your profile is in the top 5-10%. You'll get plenty of matches and some of them you'll meet and fuck. They have abundance of cock up there and of course they are going to be extremely picky. It's way easier to be in the top 10% in a bar than across several states.
Online dating is useless for serious relationships, as they're judging you solely on the pictures you put up there, so you get women who value looks before anything else.

DTron2332 · 2020-10-29T17:54:38+00:00

Yeah definitely a numbers game. I’m jacked, 6’2, 235lbs lean, hazel eyes, nice hair, very charismatic and aggressive, etc and I wasn’t getting very few matches at all. I believe the algorithm fucked me up, because the girls I would lay were usually very attractive, but it seemed as if my card was rarely being shown on both bumble and tinder for a while.

If you aren’t getting shit, delete the app and restart a few weeks later. To go from getting 20-30 matches a day to few lays a month to close to nothing is utter bullshit. It’s made for women, remember that

manofnoego · 2020-10-29T20:33:18+00:00

If you play the game expecting to win, you have already lost.

Play the game for the game itself, and you'll always win.

Jdamoftruth · 2020-10-29T17:03:39+00:00

Tinder, is it just a numbers game?

It's a stupid, rigged game. You'll win stupid prizes. The only way to win is not to play

So my question is, is Tinder now just a validation tool for women

Primarily and to create short term dating options with Chad.

I go to a pretty big state university so the amount of people on Tinder is quite large, I just feel like most girls swipe for fun

That, onlyfans, instagram subscribers, etc..

Not trying to humble brag and shit but I know I am a fairly attractive guy and sometimes I don’t even get responses from girls I know I could game and close in a real life setting

Same

daddysgotanew · 2020-10-29T16:59:53+00:00

I was fucking 3 or 4 girls a year off of there when I used it, and I’m way above average. Take that for what it’s worth

Internet-Troll · 2020-10-30T02:53:42+00:00

It is pretty toxic, even below average girls got tons of matches but for guys even average dudes would have a hard time having any success on it. Such unbalance is why it is just not worth it, and it just makes girls delusional

cfbovernfl · 2020-10-29T18:13:55+00:00

It's definitely a numbers game, but if you can't meet girls off of there (assuming you actually are fairly attractive) you're doing something severely wrong. I get lots of matches, most reply and I can meet with one every 1-1.5 months without trying too hard. Of course if I had met up with most of the girls in person first hooking up would've been a lot easier. Petty guys here will say girls are on the app for validation (already can see lots of comments like that in this thread) but really, 99% on there want to get fucked, especially when everyone's so horny in the midst of a pandemic. They're longing to meet and have sex with a hot guy on Tinder. If anything, now is a great time to meet up.

TXJohn83 · 2020-10-29T16:45:54+00:00

It’s pure numbers, I use it for about 5-10 min a day when I use it. Get about 30-40 matches in a week, 20-30 responded to messages, ~10 move to text, ~2-3 will meet/fuck.

There are a few problems the number one being that even ugly girls will match with lots of guys, the ratio is something like 3:1 user base on the app; also lots of girls just use it to validate their self worth.

Red_Pill_Brotherhood · 2020-10-29T20:03:43+00:00

All types of game is a numbers game, no matter what anyone tells you. Only difference is some close a higher rate. Tinder is one of the biggest numbers games there is.

Many girls just want attention and IG followers "Not here much, message me on IG: [insert username]." or "Quarantine brought me here. Just for laughs." etc etc. The best girls are the ones that don't link their social and have a short or no bio.

Get top tier photos. That's 90% of the battle right there.

Cast a the widest net possible and don't let these bitches waste your time. Get their number within 5-7 back and forths, then ask them out quickly after that. Line up multiple dates on the same day.

Also, the US is way shittier for Tinder than places like latin america or southeast asia. Don't let anybody bullshit you that its all your game and not a location thing. I get 20+ matches a day here in Mexico City. In my SoCal hometown I would likely be getting 3-5.

4everrekt · 2020-10-29T22:18:23+00:00

Some answers I haven’t seen:

Logistically women have a great advantage. Apparently 7% of American women are on tinder as opposed to ~17% of American men. That’s basically 3x the amount of dudes.
Prolly the more interesting point. Men and women evaluate potential partners differently. While a guy can immediately identify a woman he wants to sleep with (and most likely commit to, since most guys have few options), it seems like the opposite is true for women.

Ofc, there are some women that are looking for hookups specifically, and in that case it only makes sense to go for the hottest guys. When you think about the vast amount of options they have, why wouldn't you go for the best you can get, especially when you can "get" sex so easily?

For the women who are looking for more than an ONS, the status of the guy becomes much more important. Evaluating how a guy interacts with the world around him is much more difficult, if not impossible, thru a dating app.

The quickest path to getting tons of HB is to become a celebrity tbh. As in, get good at one (or a few) things, become known in that community, and then bring a girl you know into that community. Social status cannot be underestimated when trying to get wahmen.

Imagine being a girl getting taken to a restaurant and y'all get an upgrade bc the guy knows the owner, or you skip the line at a club bc the guy knows the bouncer/owner/promoter, or you're at some random event somewhere downtown and every so often ppl come up excited to see the guy and say his name in that singsong voice.

It creates the idea in their minds that you're somebody important, and somewhat of a rare commodity. This in turn puts them in a mindset of scarcity, and start seeking more attention from you, since your attention is actually worth something.

Edit: add words, stairs->status

mickenrorty · 2020-10-30T01:53:46+00:00

I had many a fun sexual relationship with Tinder, gave it up as I’m trying to refrain from porn and frivolous sex as it’s a waste of time and mojo

IXseed · 2020-10-29T20:03:08+00:00

The thing about OLD is that any woman who can actually get dick in real life doesn't take it seriously at all. So that chick is only gonna match with you if in her eyes you're damn near her ideal type. And just because she matched that don't mean she gonna bone and yadda yadda.

I don't say that to discourage but more understand it is a numbers game but on steroids. Just go into that mindset and you'll be fine. Also don't make it your ONLY source of pussy.

bitesizechicken · 2020-10-29T20:10:48+00:00

I don’t know the last or first time any girl I know has even met with someone from tinder let alone form a lasting relationship.

HauntingYam0 · 2020-10-30T01:50:23+00:00

Get a photographer to do some photos for you, tinder is about image, you need a theme and style.

Purplegetraenk · 2020-10-30T02:23:02+00:00

Tinder is trash. The chicks are trash In real life 1000x easier to get women than with a couple of photos next to 100 other guys

guccibans · 2020-10-29T19:22:06+00:00

I’m too attractive for the app. It made me settle for less and all the effort you put into getting just ONE date is mentally exhausting. Delete the app and stick to irl game if you have opportunities to do so.

My most attractive male friends are also not on dating apps. One of them is 6’8”, white, good face, and dresses well. Other is 6’3”, white, shredded, model face / jawline, dark hair. Probably the most attractive guy on my campus.

The reason I’m telling you about their looks is because these are the type of guys that you imagine all girls swipe on. The guys that are “stealing” all your matches and making you repeatedly swipe day in / day out and buy shit like tinder gold and plus just to get a chance.

The reality is that both of these guys didn’t need to put up with bullshit on tinder. They are very self aware and they are used to being respected / even feared in real life. Having IRL game will leave you satisfied and in a much better place than your success on Tinder.

letmereadthatshit · 2020-10-29T22:54:55+00:00

Is this the seduction subreddit?

ProcessoXifoide · 2020-10-29T17:51:31+00:00

Yes

/thread

AgreeableHelicopter2 · 2020-10-29T18:04:31+00:00

TeddyMGTOW · 2020-10-29T18:05:37+00:00

Tinder may have "jumped the shark". There's always a newer app on the block. I've had some luck with evil FB and their new dating app.

ooohwowww · 2020-10-29T19:42:38+00:00

I'm in a similar boat to you: got out of an LTR a few months back, then downloaded it a month ago and have been having a ton of success with it.

First and foremost - make sure you have good pictures. You can be the most attractive dude in the world, but if you're only showing shit photos, then you're only going to get shit matches.

My biggest advice, would be to only swipe a certain number of times a day and don't max it out. You can easily google some pages about the algorithm Tinder probably uses (it's all proprietary so nothing is confirmed), but you'll find that maxing out your swipes will lower your "ELO" that the system uses to show your account to girls. Beyond that, YOUR responses/frequency matters too, and I've found that it can quickly become too much to handle if you're swiping too much and getting too many matches to respond to, and it will pull down the "heat" of your profile.

After that, if you're making matches and still struggling, then you've just got shit text game. Improve on that, incorporate the sidebar into your messages and just move from there. Be mindful not to be a dick - while it gets glorified here, I've found amused mastery is a careful tightrope between confidence and arrogance, and I've had plenty of tinder girls share how old it gets when the majority of dudes are coming off as the latter.

All the best, and make sure you wrap it up.

cleanitupcuck · 2020-10-30T10:51:17+00:00

Tinder is only good if you're looksmaxxed and have amazing pictures. Otherwise it's only a mediocre supplement to day/social life game.

Dating apps like Hinge are better for guys who are goodlooking but with shitty pictures. The question-style format makes breaking the ice way easier, and because Hinge has an undertone of it being for relationships, chicks respond to messages and meet up a lot more than tinder. When we go on our 'date' (drinks/coffee), I treat it the exact same as a date with someone I cold approached and bang on the first night just the same amount.

Tinder is only for guys who look like great fucks and can showcase that with good pics.

Ducthadon · 2020-10-30T13:13:53+00:00

Had 2 casual flings off tinder this year, both average women. Its not worth the time and investment imo. Most of the girls I've met this year has been off Bumble, Hinge. In large metropolitan cities for those who want to date I don't think they use Tinder anymore. You might have better luck in smaller towns.

clickherebaby · 2020-10-31T16:05:45+00:00

No. Its a hit or miss.

rad_dynamic · 2020-10-29T17:53:02+00:00

Really depends man. Tinder is like the devil. The devil is a woman, and you can never really rationalise women. The best thing you can do is: Have good pics, be spontaneous and be fun and flirty. You also need to have pictures that match your description which also match your texting style. Congruency is key.

I'm at Uni and regularly meet up with chicks of there. Sometimes I'll invite them over the same night fuck and dump them, other times I'll get them to bring a few mates and we'll have drinks (like a social sort of thing) at my place or even elsewhere. You need to be persistence and sometimes even double message girls as you'll get lost in the sea of other dudes if she forgets to reply.

But yea there is a lot of flaking - women who will *almost* make a plan with you, then silence. Annoying but in 24hrs I know I will have another 10 girls to message and play with. Like this weekend me and my mate are off to a DJ booth so we invited a chick of Tinder and told her to bring a mate as my usual girl mates have covid.

Id say if I really tried, I could probably f close 5% of my matches. But I get horny and will say dumb horny shit and scare them away. Just have fun and invite girls out to do fun shit with, either unreal sex (because you should be amazing at sex by now) or something more social and get your bros down too.

distraff · 2020-10-29T18:02:39+00:00

Yeah, for men tinder is a numbers game and your experience is very very normal for men. Some women do use tinder for validation or just aren't very active. The real problem is that men vastly outnumber women on tinder. One study has it at 78% men, not accounting for bots and fake profiles.

The best things you can do:

Get the best pictures you can.
Get good Tinder conversations and turning them into dates efficiently.
Understand that Tinder is a numbers game and will take a lot of time and patience.
Sign up for some other dating sites, maybe try some paid ones.
Pursue real-life dating options as well.

cornbread07 · 2020-10-30T03:34:52+00:00

Fuck Tinder bro

FeministCrusader · 2020-10-30T04:03:46+00:00

Did you mention in the profile your dedication to equality? Because many women need that assurance.

Title	Tinder, is it just a numbers game?
Author	GarrettPK
Upvotes	78
Comments	67
Date	October 29, 2020 3:56 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/jkcnc7/tinder_is_it_just_a_numbers_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/tinder-is-it-just-a-numbers-game.323991 https://theredarchive.com/post/323991

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