Would you help this girl

ag_nuke · 2016-02-24T12:16:58+00:00

Only in exchange for a blowjob

LifeMedic · 2016-02-24T13:41:14+00:00

So she chose to have sex with someone else over you and then came to you to get help with a job interview?

Rephrasing the question makes the decision much easier doesn't it. I'd hang up on her.

Zvesda · 2016-02-24T11:06:41+00:00

If you have any thought that you might want to be with her again or still have oneitis then do not help.

If you want to help purely out of being a decent guy and giving someone your professional opinion then go ahead and help.

seattleron · 2016-02-24T18:38:15+00:00

Nope. She is using you. Do not let off an aura of butthurtness, just say you're busy. If she insists, say an exact date and time, but only if she cooks you dinner first.

Don't let yourself be used. If she excitedly says she will cook for you, then she could be wanting a reason to get you, if she is a bitch about it just next her.

thiasus · 2016-02-24T13:45:35+00:00

She's relegated you to the role orbiter, for resources extraction with no return on her part. Nope the fuck out of there at the speed of sound and don't look back.

vandaalen · 2016-02-24T11:28:56+00:00

Do you owe her? Probably not. Don't even bother answering. Just block her everywhere. Case closed.

4FF41R · 2016-02-24T14:44:22+00:00

Let's analyze this situation:

One thing is clear: she doesn't associate you with her sex life.

So, now it would be useful to her if you helped her. What's in it for you? And I don't mean sex, friends do favors to each other every day, but she's not your friend since you don't have a history. Has she offered anything? You know like taking you out to lunch, or dinner, or drinks to talk about this?

My guess is that she expect you to do this for her with no reciprocation whatsoever.

PASS for 2 reasons:

Your expectations with her were to se sexual, she's not open to that, so don't alter your plans.
She's not demonstrating to wanting to be a good friend either, only using you, you know friendzone/orbiter.

Time to move on.

nastynickdr · 2016-02-24T18:06:55+00:00

Seems like a covert contract.

"Ill help her so she sees how much of a nice guy I am and a guy like me is so hard to find, and will fall for me and fuck me like I want"

If you genuinely just want to help her with no strings attached, then go for it.

absolucion · 2016-02-24T13:59:30+00:00

If she wants some of your time, she should compensate you for it. Tell her you're willing to exchange an hour of coaching for dinner & drinks and that she'll be paying for it. Even if she gets what she supposedly wants in your precious advice, you're not leaving emtpy-handed. Treat it solely as a business transaction (don't make any moves) but be friendly & out-going.

That will all throw her for a loop and will hopefully get her seeing you in a new light. She'll perceive you as having more value and if she's pursuing you, she'll get more aggressive and may even put out to try and keep your waning attention.

harkrank · 2016-02-24T16:22:45+00:00

When somebody approaches you with the clear intent of using you, you shouldn't even consider helping them.

I'd tell her politely and in an uninterested tone that I don't know much about whatever it is she wants help with, just make the lamest bullshit excuses and keep it short to get her off your back.

She'll start hinting at rewards etc, don't show any interest when she does, if she wants to meet just say "yeah maybe", she should be your lowest priority, going to buy scented candles should be more important than seeing her.

And if she really insists and comes over to you and blows you etc, congrats. As a reward you can give her the most general bullshit advice you can think of that helps nobody.

idgaf- · 2016-02-24T17:12:29+00:00

Lots of guys saying just ignore and cut her off. You're free to do that.

But I don't think spending 5 minutes to give a few job pointers is a big deal. In life, being generous and having compassion cultivates your own sense of abundance. Also, forgiving her for giving some dude a blowjob is good for your own mental health.

But don't spend more than 5-10 minutes.

MeatCurtainRod · 2016-02-24T17:13:21+00:00

Dude, no. The answer is crystal clear. She is trying to make you her beta orbiter. Do NOT fall for it. Don't cater to her whims unless she very specifically pulls down your pants and puts mouth to cock. And even then, don't give handouts to girls like this. She is a classic use-and-abuse type of girl.

redpillcynic · 2016-02-24T18:25:29+00:00

They get pussy passes everywhere. Never do shit for a chick for free

Rasalom72 · 2016-02-24T15:51:51+00:00

You are a professional, and as such, you should be compensated for your time. How you get compensated is up to you.. so she can either pay you with cash, or with ass....

[deleted] · 2016-02-24T16:30:02+00:00

Yeah she is using you. Next.

You've indicated that you wanted to fuck her right? Then she knows exactly how she can earn your help if it means so much to her.

genjuro_zero · 2016-02-24T16:32:22+00:00

If you want to help her, make her pay in advance. Value your time.

Momo_dollar · 2016-02-24T17:45:55+00:00

The problem. You are a guy who would do it for others just to help out, but you like this girl and might do it expecting her to end up feeling something. Also she knows / thinks she can manipulate you because of this.

Solution: Either tell her no. Or tell her yes but clarify what you're getting in return, e.g yeah bring some "beers over" or "I'll order a take out and you can cover the bill"

americnleprchaun · 2016-02-24T19:32:44+00:00

I would. Unless your time is so valuable you can't take 30 minutes to offer some mentorship to someone who is where you once were. It's a nice thing to do, and don't expect to get anything tangible from it

oldredder · 2016-02-25T05:40:44+00:00

beta provider instinct.

If she'll pay for the help that changes things back to "normal" although no sex will result ever.

opening_eyes · 2016-02-26T00:59:35+00:00

No your time is too valuable. You could tell her this and ask what she wants to offer in exchange. If it is something like homemade pie or cooked supper or something else that requires effort from her then do it. If it is "a date with me!" or "a kiss!" Or "we'll see 😉" Fuck off. That shit isnt even worth it. Oh and dont hope for the fantasy. She wont offer a bj.

Title	Would you help this girl
Author	wartorle
Upvotes	6
Comments	33
Date	February 24, 2016 11:03 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/47c2bz/would_you_help_this_girl/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/would-you-help-this-girl.161197 https://theredarchive.com/post/161197

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