Going to write my experience of what was a successful start and try to identify where i went astray.

This girl was from hinge, very beautiful, smart law student. We exchanged sporadic messages and i said i hate small talk lets grab a drink, which worked.

First date was fairly textbook, friday night drinks, i had a thing to go to after so there was no chance of taking her home with me. (I'm also not really looking for that anymore). Light flirting, good conversation for about 3 hours. Location switch in middle. Kissed her at second bar and we both had to leave shortly after.

Sent a follow up text and got a somewhat dry response. Wasnt expecting anything, asked her out again on sunday, and didnt get a reply until the next day. But, she did confirm availability for thursday.

Repeated the formula. Better flirting on this date, she felt more open and enthusiastic. Showed up looking hotter. This time i was ready to take her home, but shortly after i kissed her 2 hours in she said she needed to go as she had an event in the morning. Kinda BS, since it was 10pm and she had a 9am thing. But i wasnt going to hpush the issue, drove her home and kissed her goodbye.

During the date she invited me to a halloween party of a friend of a friend on saturday. I said yes.

On saturday, we meet up for drinks beforehand which goes well. Then, we meet up with her friends and their +1s (one of whom had the party). We have a cocktail, then go to the party. Turns out it was an hour away, we thought it was 30 min. First mistake. I tried to control logistics by suggesting we uber to mine and drive my car since i wasnt going to be drinking much. She was originally down, but changed her mind and said we should ride with her friends. So we ended up in this uber.

Party was fine, mostly talked to her and ran some good flirting. Her friends were going to go back into the city to go to a club, which i had an early morning the next day so couldnt do that. So at some point i told her i was bored of the party and if she wanted to uber home with me. She said yes but she needed to touch base with her friends first. Of course, after she touches base she says they want her to come out with them. Whatever, no point in arguing. She's very apologetic, offers for me to come with them, and says if not she could see me in the afternoon the next day. I say sure. When she told me that i was pretty pissed but think i concealed it well. But i pulled her for a talk, where i basically asked what her intentions are, and she said something more like a relationship, that she really likes me and has fun with me. I tell her i agree. I feel good about it.

Eventually the rest of the group ubers to the club and i add a stop to my place on the way. Have a nice goodbye with her.

Next day text her something innocuous and get no response, still no response yet.

So i think im cooked. Here are three things i fucked up on:

  1. Not knowing/controlling logistics I knew the plan for the night was sketchy when i heard it on thursday, but figured i'd roll with it. That was a mistake. I did try to recover, but maybe i should have been more assertive with her. I dont think there was a good way out of that.
  2. Overly available/eager I agreed to this party shortly after our 2nd date which makes 3 dates over like a week. Thats too available. I also agreed to hanging out sunday.
  3. Emotional talk too early Even though it was a lowkey talk, it was still too much for a girl i've known a week. She was showing investment and i got too excited about it.

Open to hearing your thoughts