I’m just sick and frustrated with dating now, but feel so alone. The last girl seemed so perfect, don’t really think it’s working out tho.

SupremeBBC · 2022-11-01T15:52:44+00:00

Bro, just let it be and move on.

She's just not into you like that.

Let it be.

Artist-in-Residence- · 2022-11-01T18:09:48+00:00

Well if she has cancer then she probably has a lot on her plate including surgery. Have you tried reaching out to her again to see how her surgery went? That sounds like a traumatic experience.

sinhaanip · 2022-11-01T16:24:16+00:00

Your case is different man. So my advice won’t follow regular game principles.

I think the girl is distancing you because she cares. So, I would recommend you to persist. Be in touch. Don’t inundate her with messages but don’t lose the touch.

Go see her. And yet don’t push it.

eszibit · 2022-11-01T15:53:15+00:00

The cold hard truth is she met someone "better" . That could mean a hot guy that banged her well, maybe went to a bar and hooked up, maybe someone with more financial security. Does it really matter? Dating is a shit show right now and women don't value the connection as much as you think or as you've been trained to think. The narrative since we were young was that women are special snowflakes and you need to woo them n shit. Nope, nope, nope. The same snowflakes are the ones getting fucked in the back of a car by Chads, are the ones that cheat on long relationships ( i had a couple of 18 yo that were in a relationship 2+years but not that happy that cheated with me. You would of thought they are the most loyal girls, nope )

I've been in a country where i was perceived as top 10% , i had girls lined up all week. The most sweetest that " i just want a relationship " were ok when i told them i just wanna have fun. We fucked and they would come around when i told them to.

Is it cold? yeap. But you need to understand from the point of view of women. In their dna it's to find the best guy in their surroundings. So if that means sharing him with 10-20 other girls, so be it. They won't acknowledge that but they do know.

the thing is their surroundings are not the small village, the city, the campus, the social circle. Nope, it's the god damn internet now. So it's not you vs the guy next door, it's you vs the bodybuilder, the millionaire, the fuck boy. These guys have so many options they will almost never settle. So round and round they go.

Thomas_2001_ · 2022-11-01T16:27:56+00:00

I would advice giving it some time and wait with dating if it doesn't feel right. It's not bad to think about the girl, just don't hurt yourself with negative thoughts and think about what you "could have done". If it didn't work out it might be better that way. And there are so many women in the world that you don't know, so your thought about her "being the one for you" is not that rational.

Be honest too yourself about these thoughts and don't lose yourself in self pity. It won't make yourself feel better and it would definitely not make you look better in the eyes of the girl. Just keep saying this to yourself and maybe in the future send a casual message asking for another date.

sojournly · 2022-11-01T18:21:45+00:00

I think you should def ask her how the surgery went! Then dunno, maybe text her once in a while. Seems she's going through a lot, and being in a relationship and/or constant communication IS a lot and can be very tiring. Be a friend if she needs one but don't expect much? (I'm a woman)

vicvicious420 · 2022-11-01T19:43:30+00:00

Cancer is depressing. I imagine e she's trying to live a normal life but reality sets in and makes you not wanna try. Just picture yourself dealing with possibly dying. I don't think romance would be something you put all your energy in to. Don't give up though. Let it be, move on and keep trying. If you stop trying you won't find what you're looking for, and once you find what youre looking for all that suffering will finally lead to peace of mind and happiness.

kinhk · 2022-11-01T16:25:04+00:00

Too interested, too invested.

Aggressive_Soil_5134 · 2022-11-01T18:36:55+00:00

How do you fall for someone over two dates and some texting, realistically she probably found some other dude who banged her better or was more attractive

Just move on g

joelvaldezg · 2022-11-02T00:55:37+00:00

Whoever is talking shit like “Move on bro she did already” or like “she’s not into you” are clearly dumbass that I think you should not listen. Let me explain why. 1- They probably haven’t been in a situation like this. Bro it’s a girl you connected with and she gave really strong signals since the beginning and everything was so good with her, I know this situation. While a lot of us like to think that these are just numbers and that you can’t get committed with just one girl, no, it isn’t the case, sometimes you find a real connection, sometimes it’s exactly what you’ve been looking for so it’s clearly not the same. It’s not as easy as let it go, it’s not a girl you approached at your campus nor a girl you met on a night club and had some sex with her because she was pretty enough, it’s some real shit.

2- She has cancer. Read it again if you don’t fucking understand it. THIS CHICK HAS CANCER. She literally is having a disease which could cause the end of her life as it did with a lot of people before. This not only affects you physically, but mentally, there another cancer starts, conquering your mind with depressive thoughts, anxiety, feelings of not being welcomed and all kind of despair one could have. So don’t tell me shit, her mind is messed up, she probably feels really bad thinking she can’t have a connection with this dude because she has this CANCER. She probably thinks he will need to deal with a lot of stuff and it isn’t fair for him, or that she will die and he will get hurt. SO YALL SHUT UP, ITS AN EXTREME CASE.

My advice would be to stay in contact with her, do not be needy and show her that you care about her situation. Don’t move on but also don’t close your options and try once more dating other girls.

Beautiful_Site_3432 · 2022-11-01T22:23:12+00:00

Sounds like a tough break and I feel for you. I fell out of a relationship not too long ago. It's been tough trying to meet someone new especially when my attempts seem to fall flat before a first date. I go out dancing with my buddy and do a good job getting girls to dance back but none have stuck. As a Catholic, I've been trying to change my mentality to 'God will bring the right person in my life'. Basically, putting my destine in God's hands and taking some of the burden and stress off my shoulders. I just need to trust in him, make myself into a better man, and keep putting myself out there. Probably doesn't hurt to reach out to her, but if it's not meant to be it will eventually with the right person in time.

Repulsive-Fee393 · 2022-11-01T15:52:21+00:00

Go to boxing

IsDev101 · 2022-11-01T19:36:50+00:00

Women hate when you invest too much and show that you really care, so keep that in mind for the next girl.

Also trying not to be so vulnerable could help you, if you feel a "connection" keep in mind that she is probably just seeing you as a pastime and play it cool.

It sucks, it really does, but this is what i learned from my experience

indigo_pirate · 2022-11-01T21:24:08+00:00

You were probably a bit too much.

Match the energy

hey_jin · 2022-11-02T01:30:14+00:00

Hey man I’ve been in this exact position before, this is anecdotal advice but you like myself formerly may have an insecure attachment style. You don’t have to have a woman. They’re a choice and a want- not a need- you seem to have seriously pedestalized this woman to the point she might’ve picked up on it. You should maybe focus on being a complete circle by yourself and for yourself first that way you don’t over invest

hailskins84 · 2022-11-01T15:59:14+00:00

Blow up her phone, let her know you care lol

EvolvingRebirth · 2022-11-01T19:59:09+00:00

A lot of things could be happening but if she's not willing to tell you I don't know that you have anything else you can do other than move on to someone else whether or not she gets along with you if you move faster than she does she will lose interest

ProbableCoconut385 · 2022-11-01T21:31:33+00:00

Ight look man , I dont think any of the comments above might be really helpful , which is fair enough because of the lack of context , and by context I mean something that is so important , which is body language .

I ain't some kinda psychiatrist but it's more likely either she cares about you but just having hella lot of shit and would rather not ruin someone else's life , or she just lost interest .

And it's really up to you to try to figure out which one of these situations is it .

So I'd say reddit (and especially this subreddit since its more of a seduction/hookup thing than a relationship advice sub or smth) wouldn't help you as much , instead try not to seem needy , or well why not but only for a bit , since fuck it you can always ghost , try to give her some time and try to talk to her , face to face , while tryna not to make shit awkward , and while literally analysing every single shit she says or does in the convo , and I'm sure that you'll know what to do later on

i_am_abzz · 2022-11-01T22:18:16+00:00

Why do you even date the girl version of yourself. 🤔

Poutypigeon21 · 2022-11-02T00:51:48+00:00

You’re trying too hard.

She can smell the desperation on you.

Sorry to be blunt.

organbakery · 2022-11-02T00:59:47+00:00

Let it go, she's not interested.

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