Do not give a person power over you

SecretComments · 2023-07-17T15:18:02+00:00

This is a great point. I've come to understand that it's not just putting her on a pedestal though, it's letting her really affect you mentally and emotionally, especially early on.

It's hard, though. You get excited about somebody new and then you just want more time and attention with them, you want to be together more, but if you can't just relax and sit tight she might lose interest, or have something else lined up that seems better to her.

I gotta stop buying concert tickets for girls that I've been seeing a month or two, as an example. I get so optimistic that it really crushes me when, for one reason or another, they're not seeing me anymore.

Dustpan-Man · 2023-07-17T16:47:12+00:00

I did, and it literally drove me mentally insane and I tried blowing my brains out. Thank God i survived, but life has been rough since. There have been a number of infections and whatnot. BUT I think I finally found myself and am taking back control of MY LIFE

Narudatsu · 2023-07-17T14:45:16+00:00

It’s completely fine to give up power. But make sure you take it back in other ways. No one likes a pushover and guys/girls who are just “yes” people get really boring really quick which leads to relationships that feel lackluster.

aiwendil_brown · 2023-07-17T13:43:51+00:00

No one gives power away consciously or willingly. People do it because they get carried away in the process, and once they realize they did it it’s too late.

Hellsing007 · 2023-07-18T04:41:14+00:00

Another tip: don’t try to control her either.

Lead her. If she follows, cool.

If not, move on.

Lots of guys who get into seduction think they can control women. Get a predetermined outcome. This leads to anger and frustration when it doesn’t work.

You put your best foot forward and lead. They don’t have to follow. This applies to relationships and PUA.

TangPiccilo · 2023-07-17T13:48:41+00:00

Manipulations

DearCommunication919 · 2023-07-17T15:33:15+00:00

True. You can't rely on women for happiness. Go to the gym, sign up for a pmc in Africa or Middle East,see some action, come home a hero with glory and money. Be a man, make a name for yourself.

Litenpes · 2023-07-18T06:47:10+00:00

Yeah. People can object to this statement if they want, but I think it’s for the better of the relationship i.e. both parties benefits from him not giving his power away completely, since it’s a core attractive feature that is going away

JustSomeRandomGuy36 · 2023-07-18T14:06:07+00:00

Pretty girls are quite clever with these things.. they have so much experience in essentially manipulating and reading men that they know exactly how to manage power and control over a man.. I’ve never met a girl who didn’t have any experience in it at all. This means they can recognise very easily when you are giving control/attention to them so what I do is always act in a sort of nonchalant way around her.. I feel it makes me more intriguing in a way

Demonarke · 2023-07-18T15:57:03+00:00

Honestly that's why I've dropped out of the dating game, it's too much work and a lot of the time not really worth the mental anguish you go through trying to keep the spark alive.

Gshine05 · 2023-07-17T15:13:59+00:00

Too much thinking it’s all test just do you

LaughingStockTheBoat · 2023-07-17T20:28:53+00:00

But women do have power over me, they're the ones that get to decide whether I will date them or not.

tyronnezx2022 · 2023-07-18T05:21:57+00:00

Agreed. Made this mistake and paid for it

nooneimportantinde · 2023-07-18T22:59:41+00:00

Even 10/10 women have to shit, piss, burp, fart , and their breath smells bad in the morning just like ours, they are no different from us. Let this sink deep in mind. Why to pedestal them then?

Ok_Age_1494 · 2023-07-17T13:59:11+00:00

Most Men nowadays are feminine

Sixers7 · 2023-07-18T04:58:06+00:00

Oh how true this is

yinkeys · 2023-07-18T22:20:20+00:00

Accurate. This is what usually happens when you like a female too much. Don’t think about it too much too much too mucchhhhh haha

Diddlerontheroof420 · 2023-07-19T06:39:33+00:00

So profound, nothing like this has ever been said, or repeated a million billion times. You should give speeches to the public

zertsetzung · 2023-07-18T03:11:21+00:00

Glad you finally figured this out, kid.

SlimTallGuy1 · 2023-07-18T06:35:35+00:00

I learned through spending too much time around specific fetish communities that there is a difference between being submissive towards your girlfriend to fulfill a fantasy in the bedroom and being beta to the point that you would let her get away with any disrespect, and put her on the pedestal in the sense that you would do anything to please her, expecting nothing in return, giving so much and receiving so little in return, that is when a relationship can be extremely toxic.

It is fine to play around with femdom fetishes as long as the consent aspect is there, but when you feel the need to do it on her terms only or not at all, that's when it can turn abusive. That's how guys go from swinging, to being willing cuckolds, to being completely denied sexually to eventually losing their partner or being treated like a doormat slave whose only purpose is to give her money and resources and favors while receiving nothing in return.

I make it a point to always aim for equality. If I go on a date, I split the bill every single time. If a girl asks me to buy her a drink, I tell her I never buy girls drinks no matter how they look and that if she is really into me, then I don't need to buy her anything. As for relationships, the same rule applies. However, if you're making say 200k a year and she only makes 50k a year, then you can decide to contribute more than your fair share just because you can, but when you're a poor student or making a very average income after college, it makes no sense to spend more on her than she spends on you, and for a hookup, you should spend 0$ on her, maybe some on you like at a bar or if you have to date her. In a relationship, you would give gifts sometimes but you would also receive them and they should be near equal value.

Some men complain women lie about wanting equality but I disagree, women do appreciate equality but when they see an opportunity at dominating a weak willed man, they will always take it because it benefits them, it is just human nature. A woman can love you while having no respect for you, especially if you have none for yourself. That is a very important lesson to learn.

Donnyy64 · 2023-07-20T18:51:45+00:00

Is it possible to take her down from the pedestal? Something to bring her back down to your level or lower?

AtDaLastMinute · 2023-07-17T16:54:57+00:00

This shit just happened to me. Was pulling out my lunch to heat it up, and some forever single woman pulls up and asks if she could just take out her lunch from the mini fridge under the microwave... She does and proceeded to say... "This only takes a second to heat up"... I'm looking at her in shock, thinking she'll realize how rude she's being. But I don't want to be asshole either. However, I need to learn how teach a lesson to a grown woman like I would a child.

It's like, "I'm a woman and I can get away with anything" type of attitude. It's like my ex never realized how she messed me up emotionally but I look like an asshole to her friends and family.

Title	Do not give a person power over you
Author	CRISPR73
Upvotes	542
Comments	93
Date	July 17, 2023 1:29 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/15220kv/do_not_give_a_person_power_over_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-not-give-a-person-power-over-you.1428494 https://theredarchive.com/post/1428494

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