Do you pay for the first date?

c00kiecutter · 2013-10-06T22:18:15+00:00

I like going out for drinks, then pay for the first round and just say 'you'll get the next round :)' or something. I'm a student. When I'll be making a shitload of money things might go differently.

joshsway · 2013-10-07T03:12:56+00:00

yes i pay. the cost of a date is usually negligible and I have had VERY VERY poor success trying to follow the pua advice to not pay/split the bill.

CapAWESOMEst · 2013-10-06T21:46:14+00:00

I usually do, but I never spend a lot. Coffee is fairly cheap. Buying the first round isn't that expensive. But I don't treat them to a Michelin star restaurant or fancy $12+ drinks.

Methaxetamine · 2013-10-07T01:31:51+00:00

This topic has been done to death, with usual answers being yes or 50/50.

CJ090 · 2013-10-07T02:14:43+00:00

What if she insists on going Dutch. I man if the date went bad I wouldn't question why but we've already admitted that we think something's there and we're very much alike so much that it's kinda weird. But anyway we both have good jobs and make good money and she insisted on paying her half does that mean she's lost interest? Just asking

ultrasuperthrowaway · 2013-10-07T02:45:44+00:00

Always make the woman pay, it differentiates you from all the chumps.

sedditdee · 2013-10-07T04:03:28+00:00

Why would you pay a stranger for the privilege of her presence? Make it clear that you're strangers and are meeting to get to know each other (which you are).

This shows her that you're actually aware that there is no pedestal for her to stand on -- which equalizes the interaction (you're not in "entertainer" mode) and takes the pressure off of both of you to play the typical "Nice Guy/Picky Girl" game. The essence of that old game is that you're trying to pay for sexual favors, and she's trying to string you along for as long as she can before "giving in" and "giving" you sex. Not a winning game unless you're rich and she has limited options.

And you get rid of the "chivalry/generosity"-seeking Princesses who will try to force you into a supplicating frame at every opportunity, which is too boring to bother with in any case, regardless of how "hot" she looks (unless you want the "hot bitch" type, which is your choice and your cross to bear if so).

BlueSteelRose · 2013-10-07T10:53:04+00:00

I do, but I always do a low rent first date, like coffee or a picnic in the park.

If we're in a bar, I get the first round, and then we start getting each other drunk.

40Watts · 2013-10-07T00:09:09+00:00

Don't go on a first date that you have to pay for.

Sr_Wafffles · 2013-10-06T21:36:35+00:00

Just switch off date by date unless one of you is considerably wealthier than the other. With my last girlfriend I paid since there was that financial gap, but that's not my normal policy.

Whatever you do, don't make a big fucking deal out of it.

Title	Do you pay for the first date?
Author	giffengoods
Upvotes	3
Comments	16
Date	October 6, 2013 9:19 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1nv5v3/do_you_pay_for_the_first_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-you-pay-for-the-first-date.1359436 https://theredarchive.com/post/1359436

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