Does anyone on here suck at seduction?

OrlandoLasso · 2025-11-24T19:57:37+00:00

I'll post my comment I just wrote to someone. I have trouble meeting people, but I find it easy to converse and build attraction once a happens. It's more social anxiety and breaking the ice that's my problem. I can go out every weekend and never meet anyone new.

I find bars and clubs the most difficult. Most people are usually with a group of friends and I see women getting a kick out of rejecting guys that approach them. I go to the gym and some kind of social event every week like karaoke, trivia nights or playing pool, but I never meet anyone new. I did the same Yoga class for two years and didn't meet anyone. People would say hello or goodbye to me, but that's as far as it went. I'm not really sure where to begin.

I was at event last Saturday at a big hall with a small crowd, so it had weird energy. My battery was already drained from going out a lot and working, so I kinda got lost in the sauce and felt a lot of approach anxiety. I felt like everyone would be watching me or that I would look stupid walking across the room to talk to two random girls. I'm not sure I want to hire a dating coach online or something because a lot of them seem overpriced and just selling something they may or may not be able to do.

AdministrativeCan139 · 2025-11-24T21:10:05+00:00

What do you want to know? single for 28 years, then in a 2,5 year relationship from which 1 year was married. Now divorced. I am your classical "no relationship experience, falls in love with the first girl who likes him back and rushes into marriage" guy. Can you suck even more? 😂

OpinionThink481 · 2025-11-24T20:03:34+00:00

The first thing to understand is that you will always be rejected by some girl no matter what advice you follow.

That’s because the outcome is never in your full control even if you are great at picking up girls.

You only have control to some extent, the rest has to do with external circumstances that have nothing to do with you or your actions.

So even if you have a good tactic that is great, or a perfect line, or a great joke or whatever, it is still not guaranteed to work with every girl.

So that’s something you have to accept, not every girl you like has to like you back, no matter what you do or how much you improve.

This doesn’t mean you can’t improve your results, but you will never be infalible because no one in this world is infallible.

Xab123 · 2025-11-24T19:49:27+00:00

You dont get to play cause you dont start.

jackthehat6 · 2025-11-24T20:46:03+00:00

you can test the advice very easily. (pushpull etc). But at opinionthink said, you can do it all perfectly, but it doesn't guarantee any of it will work. In reality, game is just the tiny bit of icing on the top. Not much more than that.

TeachMePersuasion · 2025-11-24T20:33:48+00:00

I personally have a problem with escalation.

Things which I hear some guys do immediately, I do over time.

Chemical-Yam-1985 · 2025-11-25T01:24:29+00:00

I don’t suck at it, but I am terribly inconsistent

Vegetable_Anty · 2025-11-25T03:43:59+00:00

Progress takes time, focus on self-improvement instead of results.

DrBarackPendergrass · 2025-11-25T07:32:10+00:00

Progress will only come once you all realize that being "Seductive" isn't about "doing some technique" or about "saying that thing" -- It's about who you are.

Unfiltered.

(That's when she chases after You.)

karl_ae · 2025-11-25T09:06:18+00:00

My friend, you are asking the right question but to the wrong people. Who gets rejected more? People who suck and don't even try, or people who are good at it and try a lot?

I'm not in the demographic you asked for, but I'm confident that I can give you accurate answers. Why? Because I'm the guy who has the courage to walk up to any woman on the street, while doing groceries, waiting at the coffee shop etc etc

I can tell you what "doesn't work" It's not trying. I know some people, who approach less than a handful of "stranger" women their entire life. So you might guess the outcome. So they get "rejected" only a few times their whole life. Me? I'd guess my average is 1 per day. You can guess how much I get " rejected " or "fail". It's more than 300 times per year.

Now, back to your question. What doesn't work? There is no single answer to this question. It depends on how you carry yourself, the social environment that you are in, the circumstances, there are 99 variables. I know you don't like this answer, I know you are looking for one size fits all type of tips. So here it is: be genuine, read the room and don't be creepy

Naivety1993 · 2025-11-26T00:21:19+00:00

The problem with me is that I don't know what to talk about if I'm not interested in person. And then sometimes I just forget things, I forgot to bring beers to a girl's house when she invited me, it was all green lit, and then I just fumbled. But everything is fine as I'm learning how to force myself to be interested, organize myself, and learn how to have good conversations. It's a learning process, don't need to be hard on yourself

shinn497 · 2025-11-26T14:42:22+00:00

The advice works if you do it. But very often your emotions and fear of rejection can prevent you from doing it, as is my case.

ModeoneUk · 2025-11-24T22:28:43+00:00

I think first off most people's definition of seduction is way off.

Attracting a girl or even taking her back doesnt necessarily mean you 'seduced' her

True seduction is when there's a degree of resistance on her part.

Meaning she initially didn't agree to sleeping wit you or even spending time with you, but you managed to persuade her with your knack and persuasive charm.

In simplest terms it's getting a girl to sleep woth you when at first she didn't think it was a good idea or even tried to hide that she wants to sleep with you(for social pressure/social conditioning reasons.

No-Theory-2687 · 2025-11-25T00:44:12+00:00

i spent my entire 20s isolated. i didn't touch a girl. then suddenly started going out, met girls, fell in love with one for a year, just recently broke up.

now the reality of my situation is hitting me: i'm NOT good at game. i have charm and style but the way i was getting girls last year was kinda lucky and i fumbled a lot. now i'm having to deal with the fact that i'm not as hot shit as i thought, and i have to really learn how to flirt and escalate from the ground up.

it's brutal. i've been hounding myself and feeling super insecure about it since my breakup, but i also feel myself making progress. i journal a lot about it, i try to talk to friends, and i just take risks when i go out and try to chat w strangers and test waters.

i can't stress enough how horrible i feel about myself, but i also know there's nothing to do except to just go and take risks, so that's what i'm doing.

it helps to try to be outcome independent: to focus on just developing my skills rather than getting a specific result. it's hard tho since i was getting good pussy regularly and now i'm getting almost nothing at all. it's like if u were used to starving ur whole life, then suddenly u started eating so well, and now ur back to starving again. it causes a sort of panic like "can i recreate what i had?".

i think it can all be learned tho. like i literally feel the skill ceiling of flirting and escalating and being witty, when i go out and chat w girls. i try to be super aware of how much better i could be doing, how much better i can read her signals and introduce some small risks into the conversation and touch and stuff.

also with dating apps i'm quite aware of how much i suck at texting. i'm horrible. and i'm slowly getting a lil better at it thru trial and error.

so yea, i suck at seduction. in some ways i can really pull girls' attention, but at the end of the day i have a really hard time getting physical with her cuz i suck at escalating and showing pre-selection and experience. it's all skill tho, i'm sure.

the thing i try to pride myself on is the simple fact that, altho my other friends get more girls, they've been at the game much longer and use some luck, whereas i'm taking much bigger risks (and therefore learning much faster) than them. i know in time i'll be a hell of a lot better than them, but it's rough rn for sure. just gotta give ourselves grace and be patient.

WebNew9978 · 2025-11-24T20:58:17+00:00

Yep. Always have always will. Didn’t help that I was given a crappy hand as well

Title	Does anyone on here suck at seduction?
Author	zofoug
Upvotes	22
Comments	48
Date	November 24, 2025 7:39 PM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1p5quqy/does_anyone_on_here_suck_at_seduction/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-anyone-on-here-suck-at-seduction.1567323 https://theredarchive.com/post/1567323

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