How do you open and keep conversation going with a girl while still seeming high-value?

dkismet · 2012-10-30T02:50:06+00:00

I'm just going to throw a few ideas out there...

Be the Buyer, not the Seller.

Start a conversation because you feel like it. Talk about whatever you want, whatever is funny to YOU. If she isn't a weirdo, maybe ask her questions to see if she is worth any more of your time. If she has good answers, escalate the situation. Lead her elsewhere, etc.

It's very possible that this 'giving away your value' concept is completely in your head and a gives you a way to interpret and identify with the interaction. Admit that you don't know what's going on, and her apparent disinterest could mean speechless intrigue.

Understanding that you don't need to DO anything to be a person of value is pretty important.

Go and have a normal conversation with someone. A conversation that has no goal, no purpose, anticipated outcome, etc. Just one that is fun, funny, silly, chill, mellow, passing time, etc.

When you realize that you don't have to impress with humor, good looks, intellect, skills or anything else. You'll find that by just acting normal, people will not only tolerate but enjoy your presence.

Feel comfortable inside, regardless of whats going on around you (especially their response to you). Eventually, those around you will use ease to slip into comfort

PuffyCheek · 2012-10-30T03:37:33+00:00

If a girl is not reciprocating conversation, I just walk away. Go find someone else.

You think Tom Cruise would keep trying to talk to someone who wasn't giving him anything in return? He'd be confused by it, and he'd leave.

Untraced · 2012-10-30T00:45:39+00:00

"giving away your value"

If "giving away your value" is showing that you're low value, you need to just working on raising your self-perception of your value. Showing her your value should be demonstrating how cool you are. It's not something you should be afraid of because you'll lower your value.

squarehouse · 2012-10-30T15:25:13+00:00

Sometimes I just try to stay friendly and agreeable because that's the only way I can keep conversations going.

DLV.

Any suggestions? Is there a mindset I'm missing here?

Yep. DHV is largely contextual. Now, unless you really do have awesome things going for you right now, your best DHV is what Mark Manson calls vulnerability. You just can't be afraid to expose yourself. Stop being agreeable all the time. Don't be afraid to break rapport. She says, "I'm a big fan of the New York Clubs." If you don't like sports, then say "I'm not really into sports," and move to another conversation thread.

You also want to polarize her. If you feel that there is something about you that will cause her to reject you, don't try to suppress that side of yourself, actually do the opposite. Make sure she knows. Don't do this in the attraction phase, mind you, I'm not saying getting serious at the get-go. But once you're in the comfort phase, after the social hook point, you really can't be squeamish about telling her who you really are.

The only exception is with regards to neediness. If you're not successful with women generally, don't say that. You need to work on your inner game so that your mentality is that women want generally want you, and you're trying to see if she's the right one for you.

MaK_Ultra · 2012-10-30T18:20:30+00:00

Whenever she says something important, look at your cell phone. Shift positions in your chair, chuckle, look up, turn the smile upside down, and say, "oh yeah, what were you saying?"

AboveThee · 2012-10-31T00:59:28+00:00

I remember a statistic that said for the first two minutes you must carry 90% of the conversation and then after that she should be carrying 90% and you should be listening more.

Evolve_GS · 2012-10-30T05:59:05+00:00

I think you're missing the principles of opening and how value works in a seduction.

Here are two articles that will help:

A Guide to Openers Direct and Indirect

It's a Value Game

I think reading the two of them will really give you a push in the right direction.

Good Luck,

Evolve

allinnow · 2012-10-30T04:46:56+00:00

invitations and inspirations

itsmehobnob · 2012-10-30T17:15:58+00:00

Walk away. Conversations are 2-way. If she isn't pinging your pong find another who will.

kingcal · 2012-10-30T04:20:02+00:00

Google "conversation threading".

Title	How do you open and keep conversation going with a girl while still seeming high-value?
Author	throwaway59393
Upvotes	32
Comments	22
Date	October 29, 2012 11:30 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/12b1bd/how_do_you_open_and_keep_conversation_going_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-open-and-keep-conversation-going-with-a.1341913 https://theredarchive.com/post/1341913

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