I just got depressed reading and article on the front page about dating (as it applies to me). I wonder how I can turn things around?

Wooden-Mission6578 · 2022-02-15T15:19:37+00:00

I would advice to work with people and focus on real life instead of the bullshit online, Which is bullshit. You will without a doubt find happiness if you focus more on real life and experience things with other people out and about. Maybe go to music festivals. You gotta like some type of music after all right? Maybe go to gaming events if you Are a gamer. But stay away from the online forums where they talk bad about dating. Not much have changed since the 50s No matter what people say. We meet others and we flirt the same way. You just gotta understand the small details Which is flirting at its finest

Fulk0 · 2022-02-15T10:38:23+00:00

Care more about yourself and less about others. People notice when you got your shit together and have confidence. People notice when you are a pleaser. If you do good on your work, do some exercise/gym/sport, wear nice clothes, eat healthy, etc... and you do it for yourself, you will naturally start to be more confident in yourself. And if you don't at least you're doing good things.

You know the saying that love finds you when you stop looking for it, right? It's all about these things. Most of the girls I've been with I've met while doing regular things and just being myself. When girls see you're a guy that takes care of himself, is confident and isn't constantly trying to get something from them, they start to see you as someone who has value as a partner.

Particular_Visual531 · 2022-02-15T10:33:59+00:00

you need to work on you. First workout, and by workout i mean lift heavy weights. Dont know how? Do some online research and go to a gym. Ask someone guys that are big and lifting, like anyone they like to teach and show off a little about what they do well. Its time to not be shy.

2) Do some work online to figure out how to find your life's passion. Then plan it out and set a goal everyday to do 15 mins at least to go toward it with a long term goal to achieve whatever that passion is. Girls love a man that knows what he wants and is actively pursuing it. This will also give you huge confidence.

3) Learn how to act around people, just go out and observe people at the bar. Join meetup groups and read books about how to influence people and the pyschology of influencing people, practice what you learn.

4) research online and read about how to be successful at picking up girls and dating. Its like any other skill. step one: read about it, step two Practice it, step three: this is when it becomes automatic. Once you start learning what works and how to apply it yourself, you'll start getting signals from women all the time and youll be confident because you know what to do.

Start today while you are waiting to move out. Any questions you can PM me for more advice. Good luck.

n0wmhat · 2022-02-15T17:36:54+00:00

If you live near a bar and become a regular that can definitely help. If there is a consistent group that goes there you can start hanging out with them. Make friends with the bartenders bouncers etc. It may sound silly but its a slight status symbol when you walk in a bar and a bunch of people know you, the bartender gives you free drinks etc. Can help introduce you to other people.

Czekraft · 2022-02-15T21:07:55+00:00

Drinking is overrated. Many limit their drinking because they develop guts in their 30s due to their metabolisms slowed. But bars are great for the atmosphere and meeting others.

The other thing is to experience everything. Get out of your comfort zone. If it makes you uncomfortable, but you see benefit in doing it, then all the more reason. It's like the moral of the story Yes Man. You don't have to say yes to everything. You only have to be open to saying yes.

rynldn · 2022-02-16T20:39:42+00:00

You just moved somewhere new, so use that as a reason to strike up conversations with EVERYONE you run into, to ask them for directions, recommendations etc. Just being social and getting that momentum going helps enormously, because when that cute girl happens to be there, saying hello just becomes an automatic thing you just do without having to think about it.

myheadsonfire69 · 2022-02-15T04:44:47+00:00

It's the "rape culture", people are to afraid.

Total_Obligation_371 · 2022-02-15T20:02:07+00:00

I can already ascertain a few things about you just based on what you said. You said you're not obese, that's usually what people say when they are fat or overweight as a way to soften the blow. So I'm assuming you are anywhere between 20 to 50 lb overweight. You need to lose that weight.

Secondly you said you're not deformed, and again that's a thing that people who look like crap say to make themselves feel better. So you most likely don't really groom yourself that well or focus on your appearance that much. Your fashion probably isn't that great either.

Just from those two things alone, you're not going to do well. You absolutely need need to look above average in order to have a decent dating life in this day and age. All of your efforts should be focused on losing your weight and presenting yourself better. Not just like 5 or 10 lb. I mean actually looking legit good.

And then once you look good, you just go out and cold approach and ask for the number of every girl you talk to and try to get every girl whose number you get out on a date, and then try to take all the girls that show up for a date back to your place. And then all the girls you get back to your place, try to have sex with them. That's what you need to do, I absolutely promise. But the main thing is you need to look better. I don't even need to see a picture, I know just based on how you word things that you look below average. I don't say this to be a dick, I'm just letting you know the reality. You need to fix that first.

Edit - forgot to mention, to work on your social skills, just go to different meetups from meetup.com. also there's plenty of Facebook groups about meeting new people in whatever City you live in.

Ambitious-Ice2357 · 2022-02-16T01:51:22+00:00

If you think you’re a loser, you’ll project that you’re a loser. If you act confident, friendly and approachable you will meet women.

3SidedDie · 2022-02-16T02:14:14+00:00

If you really wanna not be part of the 26% that didnt had sex next year as you said you will need to:

1- Get a time machine.

Title	I just got depressed reading and article on the front page about dating (as it applies to me). I wonder how I can turn things around?
Author	CloutComputing
Upvotes	21
Comments	25
Date	February 15, 2022 3:32 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/sst9sj/i_just_got_depressed_reading_and_article_on_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-just-got-depressed-reading-and-article-on-the.1266763 https://theredarchive.com/post/1266763

Comments