I'm looking for a long term relationship, not just to get laid. How does that change things?

curatorco · 2014-08-09T09:49:49+00:00

Nothing. Finding the right long term relationship means you'll have to be a proper, true, and confident version of yourself. It also means having to go through a lot of getting to know phases until you find the right one. Enjoy the ride.

AJRexworth · 2014-08-09T09:53:09+00:00

It doesn't change anything. Just remember to keep building attraction throughout the relationship... don't stop once you've got her.

2014-08-09T09:55:05+00:00

You get more selective.

mrZielony · 2014-08-09T10:34:59+00:00

It changes nothing. Just like Tyler from Real Social Dynamics points out - to get good with one special woman You want You have to be good with women in general. Use all seddit tips You find interesting and true to get woman You want attracted to You. Good luck!

IzzyTheAmazing · 2014-08-09T12:42:01+00:00

It doesn't really change anything. You're not wanting to rush into another relationship, but meeting girls is how you'll meet your next relationship. Some you'll take home and you won't want to call, others you'll see if they wanna get coffee sometime. Then a game changer will come along and you won't want her to leave the next day, and she won't want to either.

Enjoy the ride.

Burguesmx · 2014-08-09T16:42:53+00:00

Check your PM

Kor_Inner · 2014-08-09T18:17:27+00:00

IMO long term relationships work out when you find someone who is your best friend first.

fr1dayn1te · 2014-08-09T15:01:33+00:00

I'm very similar to you in that regard. In general it doesn't change much. Without listing them (because I'm a lazy sob) all the same inner game principles apply. What sped up the process of elimination of all the girls who are either just looking for sex, or are simply not relationship-material for me, was that I naturally asked more questions. Questions that not necessarily can be answered "correctly" or not, but more to see how they respond.

A principle that comes to play here really hard is the "buyer's frame": I want to know if we fit together, if we share the same principles, morals, kinkyness, and lastly interests. I decide, whether or she is a good fit.

If she wastes too much time on an answer that I don't like, I'll cut her off and just ask the next question mid-sentence. No, it is not awkard :) But that's just me.

The questions I found out over time, that are important to me are:

Name your three favorite artists/singers/movies. What are you looking for in a man. How long was your longest and shortest relationship. Is there anything you regret.

(And my personal favorite ;) When was the last time that you cried.

-In that order, for calibration's sake-

Again, that's just me.

aOs_Student · 2014-08-09T11:29:31+00:00

Do you randomly buy a car before getting a chance to ride it and test it out? If not then you should try different girls to see which one suits you personally instead of seeking out a LTR right away.

Edgar_Allan_Rich · 2014-08-09T13:57:44+00:00

Inner game. Inner game. Inner game.

The difference between pickup up a woman for one night and picking up a woman for 40 years is that you both have to be a total fucking badasses in order to make it last. You both have to have high self-esteem, a high regard for other people, a high-level of honesty, careers, skills, discipline, understanding, patience, compassion, more patience, a little more patience (etc.) if you're going to last for a long time. You don't have to have any of that for a one-night-stand, but it helps.

figyg · 2014-08-09T13:08:02+00:00

In the world of adults it would be the difference between meeting at an art gallery as opposed to a bad, since you probably want quality. In college, it really doesn't matter where you go if you're shopping within your own demographic

cruyff8 · 2014-08-09T23:57:45+00:00

It doesn't... You need to start with the short-term, keep it exciting and it will last into the long term.

butts-and-nails · 2014-08-09T21:40:50+00:00

I would say wait with sex. Take the time to get to know her, date her. Give her nice compliments but not about her body or about non sexual parts like her hair or hands. And if you kiss her be tender. But I'm a (heterosexual) girl so no experience with dating girls.

2014-08-09T13:02:13+00:00

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2014-08-09T15:11:29+00:00

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Title	I'm looking for a long term relationship, not just to get laid. How does that change things?
Author	throwawayodd33
Upvotes	70
Comments	27
Date	August 9, 2014 8:49 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2d22u0/im_looking_for_a_long_term_relationship_not_just/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-looking-for-a-long-term-relationship-not-just.1374820 https://theredarchive.com/post/1374820

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