I'm losing it(Rant post)

Loud-Lettuce-1353 · 2026-06-29T06:55:00+00:00

Just keep going, take a break if you need to, just remember that if you give up the chance you get what you want from life goes from a low % to 0. The fact that it's hard is what should motivate you - it's hard, that's why most people don't do pickup/cold approach. Just stick with it. It will get better..

In nightgame, numbers should be plan C at best, you should try talking for longer and makeout/kiss, bounce her around the venue or to a different one or go for the same night pull.

Like the most difficult thing was approaching numbers. Most of the girls were in groups of girls, either inside a table so hard to approach or dancing with themselves so kinda awkward to approach again.

You just have to do it. Walk up to the table, introduce yourself, and eventually either ask to join them to sit down or lend out your hand to the girl and lead her to a different area. Obviously this will not work every time. Infact it might not work most of the times.

dancing with themselves - if its a loud dance club, tap her on the shoulder with a finger a few times, then smile (direct eye contact) and lend out your hand. Do this with literally every girl on the dance floor. Desensitize yourself to it. Now usually you shouldn't do this so obviously, but you have to be ok with the idea that theres a chance you will be rejected by literally every girl on the dance floor and be that loser. Yeah. It's ok to be a fucking loser. Atleast you tried. That's less of a loser than all the other guys in the club who want to do that but dont have the balls..

And guess what, 30 minutes later, the dance floor is full with a fresh round of completely new people and nobody cares what happened or remembers it. Now do the same thing again. Ask every girl on the dance floor to dance with you.

Yeah, most girls WILL reject you. But there's a good chance that SOME girls will dance with you. And then from there on you try to bounce her to a different venue of the club, have a conversation, escalate etc etc

abcsofattraction · 2026-06-29T10:56:07+00:00

Short Asian here. The venue is the problem. Small crowded bars where the same people can see you working multiple sets turns you into the obvious guy who's hunting. That's hard mode.

You want a venue with enough size to move around. Two floors, multiple bar areas, outdoor sections. Then the move isn't to hide that you're social, it's to use it as proof. Start with the whole group, not just your target. Build warmth with everyone in it. She watches you be socially comfortable with people she knows and the attraction builds without you having to force it.

Here's an infield of mine doing exactly this in Miami. I'm 5'4" Asian. I walk up to two tall blondes, more people join until we've got four, I'm engaging the whole group, and then I'm able to escalate with my target and get the kiss: Miami Infield

The "you look cute, had to say hi" opener is also worth switching out. It puts all the weight on her to decide immediately before you've created any energy. Engage the group first, let the social proof do the work.

Special_Rice9539 · 2026-06-29T09:59:35+00:00

I mean you’re taking action instead of studying theory, so props to you. You’re ahead of most of us here.

But the “you look cute and I had to say hi” opener needs to die. It’s so bad.

United-Implement-382 · 2026-06-29T07:04:18+00:00

Do you always tell women “You look cute and had to say hi” when you approach?

Comfortable-Tart-420 · 2026-06-29T18:18:28+00:00

r u based in the us

ethicalhooping · 2026-06-29T15:55:43+00:00

would you be comfortable sharing your dating profile

laced1 · 2026-06-29T20:45:01+00:00

It's a numbers game, you gotta also keep track of what you are doing, if you keep grabbing a woman's shoulder as you do your approach maybe stop that, look at your appearance are you kept well? Maybe a style change? It just doesn't make sense that you approach so much and no luck.

JamesCruse · 2026-07-02T15:07:05+00:00

So you're an Asian guy, in his 30's in Melbourne, Australia with heavy anxiety who plays xbox alot - have I got this right?

You've got a tonne working against you there. What country are you from originally?

Have you tried only approaching Asian women? I'm in Australia and I see Asian women do amazingly with Asian women, and an uphill challenge with other ethnic groups.

If you're anxious and your body language and behaviour is stiff - you need to be relaxed doing hard things to get anywhere, it's trainable.

This is one of the most important aspects of seduction, the fundamentals, to make seduction work with anyone.

Also, what other hobbies do you have outside work and xbox gaming?

Title	I'm losing it(Rant post)
Author	Artium99
Upvotes	14
Comments	19
Date	June 29, 2026 6:38 AM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1uikq53/im_losing_itrant_post/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-losing-itrant-post.1583868 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583868

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