"Cold approach", "get her number", "ask her out", "escalate"... These are the main key words that you'll find in this subreddit.

We men love being in control of our lives. Want a car? Just buy one. Want to get a job? Just apply. Want to get a girl? Approach.

We have given ourselves the illusion that seduction is all a numbers game. Regardless of your looks, regardless of who you are, there is someone out there that may give you the attention that you are seeking for. So, we chase, we approach, in the hope of finding that someone.

We all seek for instant gratification. We want to become rich but we don't want to work. We want to get fit but we don't want to exercise. We want to get a girl but we don't want to do what it takes.

However, this is only a source of frustration and reflects our own insecurities. We want to be rich because we feel poor. We want to get fit because we feel unfit. We want to get a girl because we feel lonely. "By chasing, we’re coming from a place of desperation. Otherwise, we wouldn’t chase."

When we chase a girl, we basically do all it takes to get into her pants. We take a risk by approaching her, we ask for her number, we ask her out in a date, we escalate and maybe get into her pants. This works with some girls don't get me wrong, however, this reflects your own insecurities. You think that you are not good enough so you do all it takes to get into a girl's pants. When we don't succeed, we are frustrated, and start the process again with another girl.

However, chasing a girl doesn't get the girl, it just reflects our own insecurity, our need to get a girl. This is neediness. You have all heard people who are looking for happiness but are never happy. People who want to be rich but never are rich. It's when we try the most that we fail the most. The sole reason you try is because deep inside you, there is a lack that pushes you to do it.

This lack is fueled by many aspects: long period of celibacy, being still a virgin, not understand why some guys get laid but not you, etc.

To detach yourself from this lack, you need to work on yourself. Your priority shouldn't be to get girls but not to feel the need to get a girl at all.

"Chasing women is a massive waste of time and mental energy that could otherwise be put to better things." What are your priorities in life? I for instance have a scientific career and I am pursuing a PhD. I'm also working out and I am learning the piano. I see my friends whenever I can. My next objective is to start reading more books and stop wasting my time on social media. This is basically my life, I have a lot of objectives to achieve and I'm working for them. Start by making a list of your own objectives, what is it that you want to be in life? And start working for your objectives. Once you finally understand that life is about prioritizing yourself, you'll stop feeling the need to get a girl.

We are all perfectly imperfect and we are all worth getting a girl. Start prioritizing yourself and you'll see how much you don't need to be with a girl to live at your full potential.

Finding a partner should be secondary to your main life. You are not prioritizing women, you are prioritizing yourself. You are not chasing a girl, you are finding someone who is worth it.

Instead of trying to get a girl's number, initiate conversations and see if there is someone who is worth your attention. Instead of escalating, try to see what she says/does and if she's worth going further. In other words, if you have to try, step back.

"If two people are genuinely attracted to one another, then there should be a mutual effort from both parties to move the relationship forward. The power distribution should be equalized ,not separated. In other words, the man shouldn’t chase the woman and the woman shouldn’t chase the man."