I’m as bored af during stay at home and decided it was a great time to apply FDS knowledge and go back online for the goal of conversation only.
Before the pandemic I was done OLD because it’s not a system that connects people to communicate and it allows all sorts of noxious behavior that I didn’t need to participate in or allow.
Stupid me thought that because so many are home similarly bored af that it was hopefully reasonable to believe that my goal: someone for simple conversation was happening basing that supposition on stay at home means lots of time. (I had always thought time was a factor.)
Won’t spend words on the typical low effort messages and appearance- based replies I received in abundance. (Sorry not sorry Kevin, “hi beautiful” is a digital waste of my time and gets deleted immediately.)
Thousands of likes and hundreds of messages later and zero actual conversations are my result.
First off, I cannot make conversation with a man who finds fault(s) with my profile in his initial message. Guys who mansplains any of the content, complains about length, lacks comprehension or tries to show off with big words inexpertly used and/or falls flat with efforts to one up my comedic style- that shit is Insta-block.
Wtf is up with all the negativity? I surmise that by shitting on my profile that gives the man the advantage. He’s saying that he sets the rules like a bargain hunter at a flea market picking over used goods pointing out flaws to get the best deal. He’s setting up his power over me and his escape route simultaneously. He’s establishing the dynamic.
And then there’s the future faking men. The ones who shove their advertising copy assessments of themselves at you. Like a paragraph of superficial superlatives of their ideas about themselves and relationships were conversation starters. Talking about anything relationships in a first message is creepy, crazy and oblivious. That’s an Insta- block from me.
I’ve also been mentally compiling the things men say about their lack of success OLD. They blame scammers, sex workers and sugar babies.
When they blame women online daters they have zero clue about how OLD is for women.
They imagine women are too cheap to pay to see likes. Too lazy to follow up interest shown by likes or messages. That women have electronic harems of admirers and are now too spoiled by all that attention to actually leave the house and meet irl for a coffee date. That women are like 12 year old girls, wishy washy, immature and prone to leading men on and/or drama queens on mood meds.
My takeaway from my experiment is that there’s no way to rub words together and spark conversation responding to negative messages from men who are entitlement-blind to reality with no social calibration that have magical thinking about how life works.
Men are fucking shit their own nest stupid. None so far want conversation. They use tactics that require pickmeishas. And apparently there’s not enough pick mes to meet their needs which makes men mad.
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