Failing a comfort test

onemantwo · 2017-10-25T22:32:12+00:00

Wait wait wait.... She is butthurt you checked your phone to see if your mother was okay instead of giving her a kiss/comfort?

Family first, bitch.

HopeisHere5 · 2017-10-25T22:38:05+00:00

I was studying abroad in Saint Lucia for med school and my friend got stabbed walking to a dinner party I was at by some deranged guy.

The emergency response on that island was so incredibly poor that I had to carry my friend down the stairs and drive him to the makeshift hospital they had there in a former Olympic Stadium. I was one of three dudes at that dinner with 4 other girls we knew.

There was a girl that used to be flirty with me at that dinner. My girlfriend didn't like her. When I told her who was there and what happened, she lost all sympathy for me, disregarded my stabbed friend, and told me to fuck off lmao.

That's women.

Herdsengineers · 2017-10-26T01:43:51+00:00

time to demote her to plate. a chick that gets like that over you checking on family doesn't rate LTR. Process her emotions my ass.

AnjaJutta · 2017-10-26T07:33:12+00:00

OP, you didn't fail a comfort test, you dodged a bullet.

chaosrunssociety · 2017-10-26T00:54:25+00:00

She was never relationship material. She realized you weren't going to be someone who she could get on demand sex from, that you have a spine. People with spines don't get used.

But still, end shit before you fuck someone else. Don't stoop to whatever level you think she might be on. Don't play games. Don't get lost in this gamified version of relationships TRP promotes. Be real.

PilledWhiteHat · 2017-10-26T05:13:51+00:00

I don't understand. Was she just upset you immediately went to your phone? If she was mad and knew why you were concerned that's fucked but I can see from her perspective you just fucked her and tossed her for your phone. If that's the case AWALT applies. Women are wierd and need to have some comfort in after sex.

Your post kind of seems like you jump to conclusions, and honestly you sound butthurt about a simple misunderstanding. This posts is a little vague so I'm sure there is part of the story I'm not getting. Butt if you want another opinion besides all these comments agreeing with you, ssuming it's over do to this seems a like an overreaction.

JamesSkepp · 2017-10-26T11:09:51+00:00

for being so ridiculously selfish knowing who the caller was

That's YOUR assumption.

You were fucking her, in the middle of that left her to check a phone - that broke her out of sexual arousal state. It has nothing to do with actual "content" of who was texting who and why, as is has nothing to do with her not connecting that to the fact that your mother is in a hospital. She was having sex and riding a wave of emotional highs from that, you broke that wave, she responded to the breaking of the wave, not to what broke it.

I knew immediately she was upset. And when I asked her why,

You knew she was upset, you should have it played cool and act like "nothing happened", apply some comfort then amp her up for a second round. Instead you went for logical explanations.

This was not a failed comfort test, you just "ruined the mood". And since she's a woman, your explanation or reason for doing so is irrelevant to her.

Don't listen to the "demote her, dump her, she's evil" - men who write like that didn't understood or accept the female nature, they are explaining this from "how she should have behaved according to them" point of view.

VictorusTurtle · 2017-10-25T22:31:07+00:00

Let her feel that way. I would have done the same thing in your situation, except, I probably would've stopped sex to check. Family comes before some girl.

indivisibleremainder · 2017-10-26T03:32:07+00:00

I like your reaction to this situation, it's the right thing to do. however, do you really consider this as you failing her comfort test? it seems that she is the one who fucked up horribly, as will be evident to her when she discovers how easily you are willing to discard her.

you said it yourself

I was so disgusted with her response ... I can't look at her the same

RedPillHanSolo · 2017-10-26T05:46:01+00:00

And when I asked her why

Your gut already knew what was up, why ask?

"process her emotions"

IMO, If your woman tells you that, she tries to conjure drama out of a thin air. I'd just disregard and move on. Taking her BS seriously to her will only reinforce such behavior in the future.

Women simply DGAF about your problems, no matter how much they seem to care for you. And frankly, this is not a surprise. There was a post "Gods don't bleed" that has some good points.

thefisherman1961 · 2017-10-26T03:09:57+00:00

She was already fucking other guys, or at least was about to. You just gave her a convenient reason to NEXT you and take some strange dick. Get checked for STD's asap. It's over.

SanJustSan · 2017-10-26T10:44:48+00:00

Women bond with men who cuddle them for a few minutes after sex - particularly true for women who haven't had a plethora of sexual partners. If you want to LTR a girl, you cuddle her after sex even if the house is burning down. If you want to plate a girl, you pump and instantly go to sleep. Simple, but incredibly effective (unless the girl has had a lot of previous men, in which case, don't even think about an LTR - it won't work).

Shakydrummer · 2017-10-26T15:26:47+00:00

That's just a spoiled princess dude. Drop her.

redditnosleep · 2017-10-26T16:25:43+00:00

You just made a huggggggeeeeeeee deal out of something small man, possibly a misunderstanding. You could just have disregard her emotions and be a ROCK.

Now proceeds as if nothing happened. She fucked up but you fucked up too.

unhealthy1 · 2017-10-26T21:00:53+00:00

Lol, that's a warning sign. Family is ill, mother even, and your girl giving you shit, for checking your phone. A 100 percent warning, run and dont look back. Not even go bacl to your ex. Next them both. Replace them I had many of these warning signs and I ignored them to my demise. Bro, it's not worth it. There are way better women out there.

Second, the guys here saying you should have played it cool for her sake and frame sake lol. Wth is that shit. I don't care if you are nailing her everywhere, your mom is sick, answer the phone. If there is no problem, resume nailing her. That's what she's in the bedroom for any ways. This sounds cold, but she is there to get your commitment, and you are there to vet her for mating and lots of sex. She gets free dinners, chills at your place then gives you shit for checking on your mom. What is that?

Bullshit, my families in the hospital I don't care what she is doing. Tell her deal with it. That's what you say. Tough. Not my problem. You are the man, if she doesn't like you checking on your mom she can fuking, leave and take her games somewhere else.

Or have her apologize and call it an awkward moment but a small deal.

but her giving you silent treatment is unacceptable from a potetional mate.

Tell her, "hey I don't know what your deal is but if you don't like me checking on my mom, don't call me again, in fact I don't think we should see each other again." Throw it on the line bro, she will come back. If not good riddance.

And let me guess, when she has something important she will have you drop everything to do that Right? see the double standard. Tell Her to gtfo. She is 100 percent testing you.

cashmoney_x · 2017-10-27T13:53:46+00:00

Women are so fucking retarded and so are relationships with them. I could not imagine having to have that conversation with a straight face.

morexel · 2017-10-26T06:52:42+00:00

Damn. Overreacting 101, featuring... Everyone here including both op and his gf.

RatScabies_ · 2017-10-26T01:12:39+00:00

She had a look of emotional distance that was easily distinguishable? Wtf is that?

iliketreeslikereally · 2017-10-26T12:20:53+00:00

That's not a comfort test it's just her being a spoiled little shit. You also overreacted, should've schooled her, punished her and moved on with this never happening again.

Ridiculous to just cut off a woman for being spoiled and too much into you. School her.

sigma_fi · 2017-10-26T18:17:41+00:00

Definitely would not consider all girls to respond this way knowing the circumstances. Maybe she just wanted to cause an issue that lead to a breakup possibly? Most girls who are thinking about cheating/wanting to breakup make big issues out of little things and use that as a scapegoat.

EDIT: IMO OP you didn't fail a comfort test, she failed the LTR test. This should be a mere reflection that she would not be good as an LTR as this kind of egotism would translate into other behaviors that would strain the relationship anyways. As the other people in this thread have pointed out, consider this a bullet dodged.

ThrowFader · 2017-10-26T23:34:54+00:00

OP i respect you a little bit.

good work

Beyond_The_Scope · 2017-10-27T01:05:05+00:00

Are you sure you aren't just seeing ghosts?

Furthermore, is any relationship that's balanced so finely even worth it?

Abnull · 2017-10-26T11:48:00+00:00

I don’t think this is about letting your guard down or failing a comfort test. She is just a bitch. Why date a girl where you feel you have to walk on a tight rope?

She made the mistake, not you. Your only mistake would be not ending it right then and there (not sure if you did or not). She disrespected your family.

If she is really repentant, maybe give her a second chance with conditions. She treated you like a god, act like it.

fromthecrypt8 · 2017-10-26T21:32:13+00:00

As far as the update: how did you plate her without Keeping her as an LTR? Did you tell her you should just fuck from now on?

Aktiv8r · 2017-10-26T11:57:16+00:00

As soon as she would've acted butthurt, I likely would've nuked it.

"Girl, you are nothing to me when it comes to my mother."

I've quickly prepared myself for the breakup.

Then don't wait for her to make that decision for you. Be the man and end it yourself. If you let her end it, you are either in her frame or letting her control your frame.

But it's over. I can smell it in the air. I can't look at her the same now for being so ridiculously selfish knowing who the caller was and still not being able to help herself from feeling somehow 'wronged'.

So you've already ended the relationship in your mind, just follow through in reality. That feeling will never go away until she does.

Plate her if you want, she's the perfect candidate for that.

Weefilly · 2017-10-27T02:36:58+00:00

This isn't a comfort test. This indicates a lot worse problems like having no frame, control of the relationship, SMV.

CloudGuide · 2017-10-27T00:55:40+00:00

Yeah, I agree with most of the other posters here. This wasn't a failed comfort test. It's more that she was momentarily upset about being 'rejected' for something else, and then when you asked 'why?' to her it validates her negative feelings and gives them more to grab onto, i.e. to make a mountain out of a moehill, makes her feel justified in feeling bad, it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You should never ask 'why' to her appearing upset. She probably is trying to look upset on purpose just to get a response. Either ignore her feelings totally, or make fun of them.

Title	Failing a comfort test
Author	SwoleyMoleyFrijoley
Upvotes	63
Comments	62
Date	October 25, 2017 9:47 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/78r15q/failing_a_comfort_test/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/failing-a-comfort-test.46778 https://theredarchive.com/post/46778

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