Frame at the workplace

AlterUltraEgo · 2018-03-04T16:10:16+00:00

The idea of holding frame is critical when working in the trades. The ideals of masculinity have not completely evaporated, so if someone shows weakness, they are still immediately lowered on the hierarchical structure.

anish610 · 2018-03-04T14:48:25+00:00

Great post ! Can you give some more examples on how to hold frame ? Because for many is a very vague concept to internalize.

dddude1 · 2018-03-04T19:02:02+00:00

In my opinion, frame is the basic belief that you know what you’re doing in a given situation. All behaviour follows on from this conviction.

The reason you lose frame is because 1.you don’t know what you’re doing or; 2. You look like you don’t know what you’re doing.

So if a client comes to see you and you do 1,2 or both, you’ve lost the frame and obvious consequences follow.

This is why owning your shit is such a fundamental concept. If you apply it across the board and literally OYS to the point where no one can tell you how to do your job because you got it covered, you will naturally have a better, stronger frame that you did not have previously in that environment.

Yes there’s fake it till you make kind of frame, but it is much easier to believe you know what you’re doing when, due to mastering your craft, you actually do know what you’re doing.

When at this level you won’t look to colleagues if you’re unsure of something as a first port of call. You first do the work yourself, covering all your bases. Then, if you’re still unsure, you approach a colleague and ask for assistance from a position of strength and ownership as opposed to a position of weakness and incompetence.

If you do mess up, you know it was most likely from an unforseeable error. Own it, acknowledge the mistake and move on.

The area where bosses may catch you off guard is your need for validation/recognition from them. They’re used to this and expect you to betafy yourself to them. They expect the submission. Obviously the 48 laws of power apply, so never outshine the master. But, if you OYS and don’t look for validation/recognition from your boss or others, you will hold frame better with your boss.

Don’t laugh a little harder at their jokes when they’re really not funny; talk to them like you belong there! Like you know what you’re doing (if you don’t know what you’re doing at your job then STFU and put in work until you do). I used to really accommodate my boss, laugh at all their jokes, be abit too agreeable. Now I give a grin at best; unless it’s genuinely hilarious. I prioritise my work over theirs and let them know if I can’t do what they ask me too. I talk to them normally and often make them laugh too. There is no falling over backwards because ‘they have spoken’.

I have good talks with my colleagues, they ask my advice and I make them laugh often, so they’re always coming into my office. If they’re talking about something boring or stupid, I literally zone out whilst doing something else. No need to make a mediocre contribution just for the sake of it, wasting your time in the process.

Additionally, some staff love to talk just to talk! It can be about the most garbage subject in existence but they will abuse your time and talk about it. Be aware of this. Value your time. You don’t need their validation so why are you listening to them vomit their life story for the 3rd time. If I’m in someone else’s room when this happens, I literally respond to whatever they said (usually saying ‘yeah, can’t win em all’) whilst walking out their room. This ends the verbal vomit, maintains your frame and they still feel listened to.

Since embracing OYS, no matter how hard or intense work gets, no one hears me complain about it. I take ownership of the work and get it done, expecting zero help. Of course, delegation and prioritising are invaluable tools here, but all is done from a space of ‘I know what I’m doing.’ Because I own my shit, most problems that occur now are problems due to the structure of firm and not my problem.

Because of this the boss rarely criticises me and praises me often, whereas prior to employing trp at work, the opposite was the case.

DaftMD · 2018-03-04T16:55:57+00:00

Hmm, establishing frame in a preset power dynamic shouldn't be difficult in the first place, i.e. the client is always the one seeking help, thus elevating the consultant above the client prior to any interaction. By showing up a client shows willingness to enter your frame. It would be more interesting to see examples of keeping frame with coworkers and superiors, as it's a whole different playing field, I'd assume.

Zitrone77 · 2018-03-04T16:10:32+00:00

Frame? That’s what you call frame? She did her job and you did yours. She probably rolled her eyes as soon as you walked out the door and thought what a chump.

greatslyfer · 2018-03-04T20:31:54+00:00

Kind of lame that we need to use frame in order to give your logical arguments without them being hampered by the emotional barriers/conditions that people put up when they're confronted with information.

PhaedrusHunt · 2018-03-04T22:16:54+00:00

This post was excellent.

I have found that holding frame has transitioned over to more success in my business as well.

I've been thinking a lot about my own father. He was very driven, intelligent, and talented. But he had a very overbearing father and he himself never managed to really get a concept of frame and hold it. It basically sank his relationships with my mother and other women, and it also directly led to him losing his business.

Holding frame is the basis for passing all shit tests, business, day to day life, relationships with women.

I was thinking today about a specific fight my parents had when I was a kid that ended up becoming a domestic violence situation. My dad was home late from work very tired, sitting watching TV and eating some food or drinking a beer. My mom was a well-kept housewife but that didn't stop her from picking up my dad's dirty sock off the floor and complaining to him about it. All he needed to do was to say yep that's my sock go put it in the laundry and bring me another beer. Make sure you fold it and put it up the right way when you take it out of the dryer tomorrow.

Instead he freaked out that she would have the nerve to complain. She was doing what a woman does-- testing the see if she could walk over him. He failed in the worst way possible.

Holding frame allows you to stay cool and collected even during chaos. In a sense it creates a space of order even in the midst of Chaos. Frame is your best sheild.

WillKane · 2018-03-04T23:24:21+00:00

Great post! I think an important skill in the workplace is being able to confidently respond to a question that you don’t immediately have an answer to.

Flying_Wingback · 2018-03-05T07:12:13+00:00

I'm in inside sales. Most of my cowokers use the let me see what my manager can do bullshit to get the sale. It's the best way to lose frame and respect from a potential customer.

Kapricon62 · 2018-03-05T11:44:47+00:00

holding frame at work is hard in my instance especially since its such a high stress environment

RuminantBearer · 2018-03-05T20:55:05+00:00

How you do keep frame in retail work?

Blunt-as-a-cunt · 2018-03-06T17:47:51+00:00

In selling, knowing when to fall silent is important

dontbethatguynow · 2018-03-05T17:15:08+00:00

I hated dealing with clients, so now I am the client.

Title	Frame at the workplace
Author	dddude1
Upvotes	205
Comments	44
Date	March 4, 2018 1:27 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/81xna6/frame_at_the_workplace/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/frame-at-the-workplace.49034 https://theredarchive.com/post/49034

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