A few months ago I wound up giving a small talk at a medical conference to a bunch of medical students. The topic? How everything is their fault.. but wait there is good news. Some of the kids took to it like fish to water. Some.. not so much.
Here is the thing: There is NOTHING in your life that is not YOUR FAULT. This is actually great news. If you can think of everything as somehow your fault, you can find ways to change it.
Even if something is "Not Your Fault^tm" it still is, in some way. Got rear ended while at a stop sign? Watch your rear view. Got a Stroke? Change how you eat.
Your kid wants to cut themselves. Sorry, that shit is entirely on you. Who else is to blame, the mom??? You know better.
Have a case of Shitty Genetics? Still your fault.
Why?
If you come at this with the idea of either blaming someone else you are wasting your time. My time. Everyone else's time. You can not change other people. You can not change how they see your flaw. You can not change the fact that Dad did not wear a rubber and knocked up mom.
You CAN change how you work the problem that is your shitty genetics. You can sit there and feel sorry for yourself. That is certainly one strategy. Let me know if that works for you.
What you can do, is get your ass up and alter other aspects of your life. Alter your mentality. Become Slightly Evil.
Have a Gorilla Mindset. Negotiate well.
Everything in this life is your fault kid. Deal with it. Mommy and daddy can't help you. Their own shit is pretty fucked up too.
Look. You have a choice. You can either start seeing the hard parts of your life as opportunities to be evaluated and thereby decide to change ( or not) aspects of your life, or
you can be a victim of everyone else's life. A side character in a play you are not even aware of.
But there is good news... If you act now....
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