Been here for a while, currently in a relationship with an awesome girl I met using skills found in /r/seduction. I noticed that once I was in a relationship (even if women didn't know I was), my texting game was building attraction from them and they were starting to initiate IOIs all over the place.

I just want to share some things I've noticed about my texting habits that probably had something to do with these women finding me attractive. I know these things have been posted hundreds of times already, but I think constant reminders of this successful advice is good for such a community. I learned from a lot of things I saw discussed extensively in multiple threads. It put things in multi-contextual scenarios and really made it seem more trustworthy since instead of some internet stranger talking about it, two internet strangers were claiming the same thing.

Here's how you can easily text better:

Drop the effort level

Seriously, stop caring so much about texting. I started caring less and less about keeping constant communication with everyone else once I was dating a girl. I texted with her a little more than anyone else, but that comes naturally with a relationship. I noticed myself not responding immediately to things, not apologizing because I actually was unable respond immediately, being overattentive to women, checking the phone every 5 minutes because I might get a response back and need to check every minute.

I would make silly jokes. I would invite people out but it wasn't worded like I really just wanted them to join. My texts would say "A, B, C and I are going to [bar], you coming?" VS "Hey I'm going to be at [bar] to hang out and see what's going on. I heard [band] is playing and you should really check them out! I can teach you how to line dance to their music! Not sure if you're busy or not but you should come out and join, would be super cool to hang out lol" (note the line dancing is a thing we had as common ground) followed up with a "hey you missed an amazing night. Had so much fun! Next time you have to join us! Doing anything next Saturday? Let me know, I'm free the whole day, Sunday as well :)". That cheesy texting was how I used to text girls and it came off as needy and pathetic. Why did they even tolerate me? Oh, that's right, I was there to chat when they were bored.

Now, my responses evoke curiosity from lack of unnecessary information. I don't feel the need to justify anything, didn't have to show off, didn't have to sneak my redeeming qualities around the annoying one-sided "conversation" I was having with people. Some friends, my girlfriend and I went to a trampoline gym and I texted a girl "Trampoline gym at 11am tomorrow. Need a head count by 9am to reserve a group discount on entry fee. No response no reservation." She showed up to the gym and was insulted I had a girlfriend. Got a lengthy "wtf" text later that day that she thought it was a 1-on-1 thing, since I had suggested it before as a date. Definitely ignored that one.

Some last tips and pointers:

  • Keep your texts simple and don't waste time crafting the perfect text. It doesn't matter what you say, if she is interested she will continue talking with you, which makes it a good time in the "getting to know you" phase for her to actually get to know you
  • If you give everything away in a text, you have nothing new or engaging to offer when you meet in person
  • Turn off the "read receipts" if you use an iphone. It's stupid for both you and her. It shows her that you always read it and it shows you she read it and is ignoring it for now (by the way stop wasting time on someone who ignores your texts and only responds when you text her and she's bored enough to respond)
  • If you're analyzing your texting game and trying to perfect it like a science to magically get you laid or whatever, you're still doing it completely wrong. STOP CARING ABOUT WHEN TO TEXT AND EXACTLY WHAT TO SAY.

Finally, if seduction is not working for you after actually doing what's suggested here, cut your time spent actively seeking women in half, and take up a cool hobby or do something daring in its place. I took a motorcycle from NY to CA and back over a month and when I got back, I had a new understanding on life priorities. It was really easy to start building attraction when I had the confidence of an adventure.