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LateNightLattes01 Archive

View 2 posts and 322 comments by LateNightLattes01 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

Delusional TO YOU but women get tons of harassment and threats of violence often. It is not a rare possibility at all. And are you forgetting that most men and physically more intimidating and stronger than most women? There is just more potential for harm even if that wouldn’t necessarily harm a guy. If you can’t see that you’re being purposefully obtuse on the matter. Men inherently hold a higher ability to hurt/harm/kill women because they are almost always bigger/stronger/taller than most wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/20 05:29 AM
3

sigh. Very important distinction here: Pedophiles who get caught tend to have low IQ. The ones who are less stupid are much less likely to be caught. A lot of high profile pedos and pedos who are a part of these rings are much more intelligent-unfortunately- so they don’t get caught and this skews the data tremendously. Personal anecdote but my father was quite bright ... but still a raging violent pedophile who trafficked me and other kids when he could. I’ve known plenty of pedos who haven’t b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 11:18 AM
2

Oh cool! Thank you for explaining! Understandable. Congrats on the upcoming divorce 🥳 good job on the leveling up~
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 09:36 PM
10

NO! No will not be imagining that EW! I don’t need the nightmares.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:57 AM
23

Okay I need to ask what the hell does STBX mean?? I just see it and think Starbucks..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:35 AM
26

Why? Just fucking why? This is a horrible way of thinking. Never date potential, date for what is right in front of your face nothing more nothing less just the person as they are. When people show you who they are- believe them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 01:28 AM
18

Can we not use stigmatizing language towards mental illness when men are really just being assholes and not suffering from anything other than narcissism and entitlement? Clearly not bipolar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 04:26 AM
12

Or a teeny tiny guillotine : )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 01:08 AM
12

God - he’s so ugly too. Fat this fat that- and he’s like morbidly obese?? Yeah okay fuck face 🙄 take your hypocrisy elsewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 01:00 AM
2

If it was a place I wanted to go and I had time off- I would take the ticket land- tell him to fuck himself and go have fun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 07:18 PM
4

Is THAT why I’m incredibly horny right before and during my period?? I’ve always found it to be the most irritating thing because I don’t like period sex- I just don’t like the mess of blood potentially getting anywhere. I think it would be the only time where I would prefer shower sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/09/20 09:46 AM
2

Huh, wow that is so strange. I have a photo ID because I cannot physically drive and likely will never be able to. And I have no problems at all with it even in different states ... never been an issue. From rural south to both coasts have had any problems. A pity that some folks are apparently given the run around for a perfectly valid form of ID. That sucks! You still have to stand in line at the DMV for it! Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:17 PM
11

I hate that these statements are so damn accurate - I really hate those things about men 🙄 (the ones that act allergic to comfort and putting effort into your surroundings).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:17 AM
45

Damn, I’m so proud of her! Can we send her like a gift basket or something? Those fruit and chocolate baskets with the words “Congratulations for being that amazing and having that strength of character.” Or “Sorry there are so many assholes at your school, but here’s an award for your bad-assery 🥇🥈🥉 Enjoy the chocolate~”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 03:53 AM
40

Fuck no! I’m proud too 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 03:49 AM
6

Omfg - I would have SCREAMED at the top of my lungs “Look everyone I have a uterus and I am bleeding blood!!! I have tampons for it! TAMPONS MOFO!!! TAMPONS - yeah that’s right TAMPONS- and this is my husband right here- the man afraaaaaid of some TAMPONS- but not his dick. MOTHER. FUCKING. TAMPONS!!!!!” All the way to the car- like fuck that shit. Fucking HATE fragile masculinity! Fuck him- he doesn’t have to deal with it- FUCK THAT BASTARD. If my uterus is bleeding- I will make SURE you know a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:07 AM
15

A LOT of cheating men will say they are happily single. I went on a first date with a dude, and I thought it was all cool. He eventually let something slip about “so my wife doesn’t know.” And I was shocked and saddened. I never wanted to help some guy cheat. I never talked to him again, but PEOPLE DONT ALWAYS KNOW!!! MEN WILL LIE THROUGH THEIR DAMNED TEETH - as if it were nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 04:37 AM
4

Now, if the rest of men could just understand this.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 04:01 AM
20

It’s okay 👌 we’ve all been there. Live and learn as they say!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:17 PM
19

Just wanted to add in- if you don’t have a license you can get a state issued photo ID that is exactly like a license, if you can’t drive. So, you don’t NEED a license for basic photo ID. However, if a person ever plans on driving- then yeah you need a license.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 04:00 PM
5

Ahahaha! That’s great! Wow I am definitely using this one- and I actually want kids, but I hate when people ask, assume, and are obnoxious about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:04 AM
12

Omfg!!! As soon as I saw it was in Japanese I was like “I only know of ONE Japanese man cute enough to do something that Sweet!! For his partner- I wonder if it’s Jun?” And then it was!!! Omfg I love this so much- and I love them they are soooo cute and adorable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 03:28 AM
3

God what a fucking asshole he is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 03:19 AM
8

HaHaha it really is! They project more than theatre equipment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 03:19 AM
4

This is me! Including any other cute animals I see ever - anywhere. Like “look at this cute dog I saw across the street! Look at my friends cute dog! Look at this random cat I saw!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 03:17 AM
7

Oh yeah unfortunately I deal with this person pretty often- he’s in the same social groups as me/knew each from college and he has literally no one else in his life besides his mom so I hear his bs everyday in some form or another.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 02:41 AM
32

Omfg I know someone like this!! Dude is a total train wreck and acts like MIDDLE SCHOOL was just the other day and say inane shit like “I still feel like a kid on the inside- I don’t want to aduuuult.” Like... dude shut the fuck UP your almost 30. He’s a very disturbed person and would never recommend anyone date him tbf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 02:20 AM
11

Yeah, I’ve noticed all those supposed cassa novas out there thinking they are “playing the field” are really just out there losing their time and wasting opportunities. Then they end up ultimately alone and bored and horny and then do exactly zero introspective processing and blame women. The ones who do realize might blame themselves cause it’s too late now! You wasted your time endlessly chasing- that wall you talk about for women? It’s really a mirror and all that trash talk is just projectio…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 12:37 AM
43

I swear to fucking god this is so true. I added someone on Snapchat once and he was kind of annoying so I said I wasn’t interested. Didn’t use that account and didn’t get his snap notifications. I logged back in like 8 months later to see I have these snaps. Some where from friends (who I talked to elsewhere) but I saw he had sent me an absolute barrage of unseen and unanswered incremental dick pics. Like he showed parts of his dick in different ways before just showing his whole dick, and did t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 07:00 AM
32

It never ceases to amaze me how some men will ignore the shit out of you and then come crawling back begging literally YEARS later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 06:56 AM
2

That’s when you say “Hmm, sounds like a personal problem to me. 🤔” And block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 05:37 AM
5

Congrats and good for you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 05:31 AM
8

I love this ~ I love flowers they are so bright and pretty very cute!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 02:04 AM
23

I LOVE HER!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 08:59 PM
7

That is NOT and should not be the child’s problem or burden. Children are inherently unsexual. It’s just the pedos and freaks out there thinking shorts look even remotely “sexual” on a child. Whether they wear a potato sack or a child’s bikini they still are and look like dopey awkward children. It shouldn’t matter what kids wear really because who cares- they aren’t sexual. And dressing a kid in “more conservative clothing” isn’t going to do shit. Kids get molested and raped no matter what they…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 12:31 AM
16

I tried that too- dress super duper conservatively nothing flashy or remotely attractive tone down EVERYTHING. Don’t go outside much don’t talk to strange people - NOPE all it does it subjugate your spirit and soul. It’s NEVER about you, never. Never has anything to do with YOU. It’s their fucked up shit. Never dim your style or expression because others are fucked up- doesn’t even work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 07:33 PM
34

Wow 😳 I feel super lucky then.... I’ve told partners about my past traumas and nothing like this ever happened to me in response. This is so fucked up tho. I totally believe it. So sorry that shit has happened to you OP (and everyone else posting).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 02:41 AM
9

😂 sounds like my kinda date for myself too.You’re in good company here sis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 02:25 AM
14

He’s 100% miserable about his well-earned lack of voting rights and wants to project it onto everyone else. They should just execute these useless people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 07:55 AM
20

Omg I’m dead- had one guy try that with this look like “sooo sexy AmIriiiiight??!” Yep threw him out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 04:02 PM
120

The sponge-bob reference had me Rollin. That shit is so funny cause it’s soooo true. Fuckers can’t take blunt instructions for anything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 08:18 AM
45

Pro-tip, don’t use bumble, you want men with the guts to message and ask YOU out. It’s basic filtering.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:34 AM
4

Omg I love this more than I can express! “Charity I refuse to support” that’s the best! I’m definitely gonna use that at some point in life- thank you for that 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:13 AM
23

Oh gawd... that’s exactly what I would assume ... exclusively dating is?! That’s fucking alarming geez.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 06:40 AM
52

People actually give promise rings?? This that for sex or like to show you’re in a relationship? What is being promised?? I’ve never heard of this outside of 1950s teenage dating movies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 06:15 AM
11

My condolences 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 06:13 AM
23

When I was younger, I dated a dude who was 21 at the time, and tho he was a super shy dude and really seemingly caring and wasn’t a player at all. But holy fucking sexual dysfunction!! Geez!! He would get hard but then go soft randomly at certain points while having or attempting to have sex. He could only really get off with a hand job- so fucking WEIRD!!! I even tried to give him a blow job 😂 total failure! He went completely flacid like as I was blowing him. I had literally NEVER in my life h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 05:46 AM
1

No, there hasn’t been any real evidence (that wasn’t later debunked) about getting reinfected with covid- which is why I’m not concerned about that. There were some claims of reinfection in South Korea earlier on, but those were later shown to be false positives from the test picking up remnants of left over viral RNA still in the persons system. Other than that I really haven’t seen anything about people being reinfected. I think the fact that you have places that have gotten the virus once and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 03:20 PM
1

I’m not in a hurry with just this person in particular- I’m literally just an impatient person in general in life. I’m very ambitious and I generally want things in my life to happen ASAP you know “time waits for no one” and tomorrow is promised to no one. I have lots of goals and things I want to accomplish, and generally for the most part of I see something that I want I’ll generally just go after it- I usually don’t see a point in waiting because life is short. I want a life filled to the bri…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:38 PM
-1

Ohh boy. I will need a shit ton of patience for that. However, inadvertently did something like that once and it went reallly well. I’m a naturally impatient person tho lol so, welp will have to temper that a bit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:57 AM
1

I was mainly thinking in the car after a date before I leave, not like in anyone’s home alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:56 AM
1

Ohh thank you for that post it was an awesome read! Also interesting because I would consider both oral and any kind of fingering to be “sex” so good to have that distinction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 09:43 AM
7

Thanks for this, things are definitely open, but I’m just more cautious just because. He isn’t we are both in the same area and American. He lives alone with his dog and he has been doing everything remotely and I haven’t gone out for anything except groceries same for him. Thankfully.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 03:28 AM
2

Ohh haha 😆 gosh that’s a great addition then! XD thanks so much for the answer : )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 06:22 PM
2

Calcified pineal gland? What am I missing here? I don’t get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:25 AM
6

Please 🙄 if you have to say “don’t worry I’m attractive” you aren’t. When men say “I’m a good looking guy” they aren’t. Denial at its finest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 09:17 AM
14

my scrotastic dick? Ahh, that’s pure gold right there- 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:07 AM
11

Ohh this is great! If he’s really REALLY lonely he would come to you- but even then- pandemic people!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:00 AM
23

Maybe??? No girl he IS being selfish. Blooooock him and move on- he’s being a complete shit head by even contemplating asking you this. WE ARE IN A PANDEMIC. Now is not the time to do inter-state traveling. Online dating and things are fine- but in-person meet ups are just.... Dont do it. He’s an asshole, and he wants to use you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 08:59 AM
7

Omfg I’m so glad you did that. Being older now I almost wish I could be present at one of these moments and rage up to this fucked man snatch his phone and smash it on the ground or throw it out a window screaming “fuck you” and then just walk over to the women/girls and say “I hope this never happens to you again but I know it probably will, please pay it forward.” And then be on my merry damned way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:24 AM
6

Oh god this is going to make me REALLY angry isnt it? I almost can’t watch 😫
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 03:14 AM
12

Oof for me, it becomes a sensory thing that bothers me IMMENSELY after a while. I tried the “how long can I last without shaving my legs” thing and omg after a while it was like nails on a chalkboard. I HATED how the leg hair felt against different fabrics etc. so I like have to shave once every week or so or else it is like almost painful sensation-wise. But that just might be because I’m autistic 🤷‍♀️ I’m very glad some can enjoy it. : )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 10:09 AM
8

This is so horrible and manipulative. Also she will forever have the memory of her child’s birth tainted by the fact that this asshole used it as a time to propose-good god.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:26 AM
5

Ohhh I love this! You go!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:10 AM
3

This goes for friendships as well!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:08 AM
63

I’ve learned the hard way, that if people have to be ejected from your life at some point- it’s usually a good idea to keep it that way. Ugh, I usually remember the good times we had tho and have let people back in... without exception- this has ended poorly. I have gotten better at it over time, but it still makes me sad when I think about it sometimes, cause I’m still building up those boundaries still working on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 09:27 PM
3

Good luck with the interviews! 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 11:08 AM
4

Unless each meal is a grape- or anorexic “meals”, then yes exactly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 08:10 AM
4

This is SO true. I’ve never seen a point in a dude asking “how long”- literally tells you nothing about a person. Plus the one dude that asked me that was a legit trash person and totally unhinged so, there ya go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 07:50 AM
5

Omg congrats that sounds like such a success story and beautiful turn around!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 05:53 AM
13

Ouch... but very valid and true point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 05:26 AM
3

super true!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 05:25 AM
2

Just wanted to say, I love this comment! Fuck yeah! You have yourself and that’s what matters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 10:30 AM
3

That’s a great price for that brand! I love how neat and well simple that brand is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:20 AM
3

Needed to hear this- thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 08:13 PM
11

That looks horribly!! Uncomfortable. Like she’s just falling off the seat/fell off the seat? Like the words written tho!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 03:26 AM
2

Congratulations 🍾🎊!! Definitely a step in the right direction! Keep it up sis~
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 08:01 PM
3

Oh wow that’s a fascinating analogy! Wow that’s pretty cool! Huh. See that’s actually where in a way I think there at least some value in hearing things horrid people say. You then here and know of the most extreme logical ends that some proportion of people will go to. You learn what those people are like, so in that sense- it’s useful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 10:46 PM
4

Thank you! <3
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 10:31 PM
30

Ugh, I feel you on this : ( I’m generally super attracted to black guys- but I’ve had SO many racist encounters with black dudes I find it a bit off putting. All because I’m mixed 🙄 And holy crude the brazen “colorist” remarks... it blows my mind... So I don’t really date American men now 😂 I’ve never been attracted to white men tho- it’s extremely rare that I find a white man attractive. Happens occasionally but just honestly not my cup of tea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:56 AM
55

Uhhh I swear all of East Asia attracts the absolute scum of the west. Real reddit incel/neckbeard types who’s only asset is being pasty and English-speaking (usually just barely 🙄) And why god oh why are they ALWAYS sweaty and morbidly obese??? I have seen this FAR too many times to count. I know they want them for the linguistic leg up and being from “A cOoL wEsTeRn CoUnTry” and potentially having more money, but I just want to scream “DONT DO IT!!” I have warned a number of Japanese women abou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:49 AM
2

Ohhh I wanted to downvote this post so much because dude is an asshole!! But I didn’t lol- hate men like him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:41 AM
25

Very true! I learned that the hard way : /
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 04:40 AM
18

If you have to state over and over again how “safe” you are- YOU ARENT SAFE!! What a fucking sad pathetic freak. Ugh these people. Gross!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:11 AM
2

Ah thank you for the recommendation!! Will certainly be looking this up. 🙏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 11:23 PM
8

Gently with oodles of self-love and self-compassion! We grow up in a pick-me-worshipping society and oftentimes are influenced by friends and family to accept less than we deserve. It’s not your fault. However, now, the sky’s the limit! Time to level up and be amazing to yourself : )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:11 PM
46

Well he certainly knew why... takes one to know one I guess : /
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:26 AM
2

How does this sort of thinking develop?? I have a friend that is all sorts of codependent and some would say “just get some space”, but we are roommates -____- I’m starting to not be able to stand being around them. They are very much co-dependent and it’s annoying the shit out of me- send coping strategies lol. ((Also will definitely google this- had no clue what this was until now))
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 07:32 AM
15

Geez what a fucking bastard- that’s a terrible thing to say to an impressionable kid!! Also, creepy like back the fuck off you weirdo- people shouldn’t be forced into smiling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 06:34 AM
5

God SO true- that’s why the first red flag I spot- I think to myself “yep, this is probably the fifth flag- but better late than never!” And I’m getting better and better each time- very proud of that. 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:41 PM
28

Eww!!! The Doritos, the monster drinks, resident evil- good god this is a horror of a wedding and wedding cake in particular.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:25 AM
9

Read the handbook!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 08:18 AM
28

Then he probably uploads it to a porn site 🙄 I hope someone “accidentally” breaks his foot uhh I mean camera- or both not sure 🤔.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:41 PM
8

God I fucking HATE Big Bang theory- both for how horrible of a portrayal of adult autism it is and just how fucking sexist it is- I hate that show a lot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:25 PM
4

Just because the guy is an asshole doesn’t mean he’s autistic. I wish people on FDS would stop conflating these two things. Autistics usually are the opposite in that they like hoarding (collecting) things they like. Also, people can be picky about clothing and not be autistic. There are other processing disorders or neurological disorders that cause people to dislike certain sensory information.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:33 AM
3

I’ve definitely found this to be true! It’s because I stopped accepting shitty behavior from people when I would have accepted it before. Then as I work on things, I become more and more aware and my standards get higher and higher. It’s a virtuous cycle that feeds on itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 08:07 AM
3

This is a major misconception from the manga to anime/some cultural differences in schooling here. In the manga it was a two yr age gap with both of them being in HS. The American anime made this super creepy and he was a “college student” when it was only meant to be a 2-3yr age difference. I’m so sad that they randomly decided to change this fact when that’s a pretty normal age difference at that age. They are the equivalent of two high school kids dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:28 AM
71

I laughed at this, because I thought it was going to be another boyfriend post thing. It wasn’t, and I was pleasantly surprised! I thought “this is a perfect FDS demonstration of how to value yourself!” I really appreciate that you posted this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 04:30 AM
22

This. This this this this this. It’s always all about them. If they did it once they will do it a thousand times. People don’t change their patterns of entrenched behavior. It WONT get better, and the mofo is an ex for a fucking reason. This shit pisses me off to no end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:57 AM
40

Completely!!! Agree!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 08:30 AM
3

I was literally just thinking “maybe I need to get this tattooed on my left arm to remember it.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 07:35 AM
7

This is so fucking funny! I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 03:54 AM
3

Yeah I definitely don’t date bearded men partly for this reason. They have to look good without a beard first.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 03:50 AM
8

Oh man - that’s so mean!! I’m all for more varied resources for all different types of people. That’s a deal-breaker for me. And so are people who put up with that and say nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 02:10 AM
19

Another way of phrasing this would be: do these people deserve to be in my life? Or Do they add to my life in a positive meaningful way? I always ask myself that now. Huge game-changing shift in mindset for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 01:59 AM
31

I think that’s where the phrase “you marry the whole family” came from. Also, why I now vet the parents as well. If they are monstrous I usually don’t want to date that person unless they are either no contact or have some serious boundary setting skills and will always take my side about said boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 01:57 AM
1

I see what you’re saying. I think the real point it is trying to make is not that “you’re a better person because of the abuse you went through” but instead that “the ways in which you heal yourself and the resultant you is beautiful, and nothing in the past or about your abuse can take away from the new beauty of being healed and becoming you.” You should be angry and upset over the things that happened to you. They were awful, completely unfair and unwarranted, and no child ever deserves that.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 11:02 AM
3

What the hell is p&a with friends??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 08:42 AM
7

So much this!! Fucking narcissists they are never wrong 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 02:42 AM
4

Like he ghosted you right after apologizing? That’s... pretty fucking typical. Such cowards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 02:41 AM
2

Lol he’s sounds like trump- another sociopath.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/20 02:24 AM
8

DAYUM GIRL!! I need to get on your level 0_____0 I got sick for like two months this year(yep covid!), hospitalized, had to move cause my roommate turned our already shitty apartment into a crackhouse, and lost two jobs thanks to covid! I’m definitely in the hole rn with zero savings, but imma be like this one day! Thanks for the inspo! 😊 it’s refreshing to see!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 11:00 PM
1

Haha I did too! And I was like “wtf those would need to be massive flowers... uhh am I missing something here?” Lol, being American.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 07:29 PM
180

Omg what an asshole- block him, he’s clearly bad at communicating geez.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 02:59 AM
29

I will never understand this bullshit, wtf is wrong with these men and who dropped them as a child?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 02:37 AM
61

Had 3 brought it down to 2 because one confessed feels he “couldn’t ignore” and I told him I definitely didn’t want that but... it was always kinda there.. So awkward. Then another male friend just told me he wants to date me. AGAIN, absolutely no interest and it kind of ruins the friendship. We are still “friends” but... idk 😐 it’s a little weird sometimes. Feels like he’s more intense than I would like it to be idk. I generally don’t like having guy friends because of this. I literally JUST wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 02:31 AM
10

Ahhh! Please tell her this internet stranger is proud!! Congrats on the beginning of the life you want and deserve!! 😁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:20 PM
3

“I don’t know... I feel like my mental health will always ruin a relationship.” Or mother fucker- YOU ruin it by being an asshole and then you let your “poor mental health” be the excuse because you’re too damn lazy of an alcoholic to try harder! They are related problems Dickhead!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 06:58 AM
11

Omg they really do tho!!! Fucking hate it! It’s a classic abuser tactic too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 06:49 AM
29

That’s almost always true, but I’ll just revel in this one tiny moment for a second. I’ll take my crumbs of male-feminism when I can get them, but fully realize the reality of what you’re saying and agree with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:45 AM
48

I had a friend who ALWAYS did this. It was kind of annoying after a while, and I remember thinking “dating really shouldn’t be this much of a joint effort... maybe take it as a sign...”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:34 AM
25

Congrats! 🎉 it’s garbage day somewhere.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:33 AM
13

Yep, diagnosed autistic age 3! I completely agree : ) Never an excuse for poor manners or rude or asshole-ish behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 05:31 AM
8

This resonates so much. Thank you for sharing. I completely agree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/20 12:04 AM
39

Doesn’t stop them from raping children with other objects, watching as other people do it, etc all the other horrible things they do unfortunately. There’s so much more to child sexual abuse than just that- it’s a good first step however.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 09:28 PM
22

Holy shit wooow that’s so fucking profound 0_____0 I never thought of it like that but wow 😳
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 09:25 PM
13

That’s so stupid, at least get your genders right. Perhaps he’s too stupid for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 02:22 AM
5

Ugh this legit happened to me twice in two slightly different ways. It SUCKED!! I got so mad when after “explaining myself” aka giving them an ego boost they were like “oh well I’m sorry it feels that way to you- DiDnT mEaN tO mIsCoNsTrUe AnYtHiNg!!!” Bullshit. If they had been sincere and cared- they wouldn’t have done what they did. However, horrible men will be horrible. Never giving men the time to do that ever again. Huge fucking waste of breathe. I get angry when I think about how they pla…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 11:20 AM
3

I totally will! Thanks for the recc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 05:08 PM
25

Omg I love them ❤️ this is beautiful thanks for sharing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 06:51 AM
19

This is hot! Also wtf I wish women did so much for their health now and weren’t so afraid of being fit and potentially muscular.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 06:45 AM
15

YES!! I hate when they want someone who looks done up but then get snotty about women who actually invest in these things 🙄 Ties into the whole “flawless cool girl” thing. It’s pathetic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 06:39 AM
12

Well this was horrifying to read o_o so true, but horrifying xD I’m sooo glad I’m bi. At least I can still try and date bi/gay women if I strike out with men- which I sense will be the case cause men out of their 20s and early 30s just... .__.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 06:14 AM
7

It’s fucked up right?? I only know this because I swiped right on one guy literally because I was like “WHY does he look so old for his age?? He CANT be just 30. Nope- he said he was 40. I was like- nope never again. Only swiping on people who have the correct fucking age- and look like it. Fuck that. Stop lying assholes!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 04:37 PM
28

also some dudes just straight up lie. They put “28” in their profile but then say “iDk WhY iT sAys ThAt!!” And then go on to say they are like 40 🙄 or don’t outright say it and still be like 38 or some shit. They are disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 10:54 AM
3

This. So. Much. A lot of pick-me friends I had ended up being annoyingly narcissistic and would never self-reflect and never tried anything different. They one in particular used to complain “I’m not a therapist!! Why is she complaining to me about her abusive boyfriend for the millionth time!” And she failed to see the irony in her complaining about someone else complaining. I told her she needed to set boundaries or I would set boundaries with her about this crap. Of course she never did. We a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 10:24 AM
3

Oh... well that’s disturbing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 06:43 AM
9

What an evil man. It’s so sick to abuse a child for wanting to be around her mother wtf is wrong with him. That’s disgusting behavior to hold over a TODDLER!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 04:13 AM
16

Feed him expired dog food HAHAHAHA that’s hilarious. Thank you for that mental image- that’s what he would deserve.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 02:54 AM
2

Ugh same. He was great when we first met- talked everyday, super responsive like I wanted at the time. But then classic story here, he would do that whole push and pull, was just an asshole in some very small ways- which of course! I ignored!! Then we went to our separate countries (ugh yeah- separate countries- far away countries!) and he put in zero effort saying “I’m just not good at LDR... it would be different if you were here...” Along with all of the dumbass future faking and bs what-if t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 09:47 PM
35

Ah- this is painful for me to read, but not new information. I got played by that “we are too far away now” line and the dude was like “if you were closer, it would work out” - he just didn’t care. 😔 Hurts to be played after you had already caught feels...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 04:36 AM
8

So, a couple of things in what you listed stand out as red flags to me. 1.) the complaining about other men- when people do that it’s almost always because they are projecting what they do onto others. 2.) him giving you access to all his stuff is also slightly similar to projecting. It’s not really normal for that and it kind of sounds like- “look, look! I totally have nothing to hide! Yep see how squeaky clean I am?! Nothing to see here folks nothing at all to see!”. 3.) for me having a kid fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 02:49 AM
4

Aww that’s so cute!!! I would love flowers 💐! Mostly because I love flowers 😊 Man that is the cutest thing! Great job with him~!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 11:42 PM
16

Oh okay, sorry then. I mentioned futons because I own one, and I wondered if people applied this to them as well. I’ve never heard of the mold thing for a mattress on the floor though- the more you know. I still enjoyed the meme. Never thought this would be a thing tho so now I know 😳.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:51 AM
14

Welp- that does sound uncomfortable. I see what you mean now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:47 AM
45

Yes of course Japanese futons are moved out of the way during the day. That’s the point, and airing them out is how you take care of them. I prefer them exactly because you can take them out of the way during the day and use that space for other stuff. I’ve never seen anyone/met anyone with just a mattress and am not defending that- no need to downvote. I was just asking the question because I don’t see anything wrong a single person living alone owning and using a twin bed(with a bed frame). If…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:23 AM
7

Thank you for adding that bit about autism. I’m autistic. I have the hardest time with more subtle/non-verbal things that I haven’t studied or been exposed to before. HOWEVER, that being said, autistic people who aren’t horrid assholes should ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS stop if you explain something in words that they’ve done wrong or that you don’t like. No excuses, no “but why?/I don’t understand” and then continue whatever behavior. Don’t coddle or accept lesser behavior even if a person happens to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:14 AM
3

Omg.... makes sense and I totally agree and everything but just.... omg. I’m horrified again, as usual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:05 AM
68

What’s wrong with twin beds?? They’re small, take up less space, and fit me perfectly 🤷‍♀️ I’ve never liked king sized beds. I don’t like huge beds in general. But I also prefer a literal futon like I used in Japan (not the weird American couches called futons).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 02:40 AM
7

I have maaaaaaaad respect for this woman- she’s awesome for calling his bitch-ass out. He doesn’t deserve feminine attention at all- he’s a disease spreader. Zero sympathy from me for that shit- absolutely none.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 02:37 AM
9

Oh nooo! That’s so sad : (( I wonder if there’s a way to get that reinstated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 02:36 AM
5

I literally recoiled in horror at that last sentence in your comment- WTF. Diseased dick is NEVER worth it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 02:35 AM
11

Lol two push up bras and did contouring make up!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 01:33 AM
47

Why are they like this? Child abuse. Abusive upbringings. Trauma.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 09:20 AM
3

Men are responsible for 50% of the problems couples experience in trying to get pregnant. FIFTY PERCENT!!! It takes two to tango god damn it!!! Males need to realize that their sperm degrades and are half the problem here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:34 AM
20

Yeah they are usually enabling raging narcissists at that point, just like mine was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:26 AM
13

Omg no do NOT date military or police, they are absolutely flooded with absolutely narcissistic power hungry types who want to murder with impunity. I had a lot of family members who wanted to do military or policing because they were poor and had no other options. They all got fucked up from it. It’s not worth it. Would never even bother with those types. Just avoid. You’d never know until it was too late if they were the kind to rape or murder because it never gets put on their record.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 08:34 PM
23

And not even really different languages. They are all heavily related, use the same alphabet systems and share lots of vocabulary. BORING!! Try harder! Come back to me when they can say: “I speak Mandarin, Icelandic, Punjabi, and Yiddish!” Tired of software engineers acting like knowing conversational Germanic languages is actually an amazing skill. Pretty much everyone in Germany, Switzerland, Belgium, and the Netherlands can say and do roughly the same exact thing- not at all impressive, the n…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 10:07 AM
52

Oh god I love that song but it’s such trash. Even as a kid, I was like “ugh, this is so sexist... why does she think she’s better than this other girl when he’s still obsessed with that person??” And the part about the studio I was like “damn, he can’t even write his own stuff, Takes credit for Avrils work, and HE’S THE FAMOUS ONE?!” And then I rationalized liking it by pretending it was a song that was warning against sleeping with men and not getting an abortion if pregnant because you end up …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 10:01 AM
10

“Block him on FB, block him on Instagram, block his phone number- block him on everything. BLOCK. Stand up for yourself and block!” I know zero Arabic, but that’s how the translation went in my head. Like that queen energy transcended language barriers. Love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:48 AM
30

That poor boundaries with others (esp. family) is key!! It means they just let shit happen to them and they will keep poor boundaries with any and everyone. It’s also similar to having no moral backbone so when they cheat it is also just another thing that happened to them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:45 AM
2

Congrats on finding a home here 😊 keep working to level yourself up and the relationship stuff will work itself out in the end. The most important thing is to develop self-compassion and self-respect. Put yourself first always (so rare for women), and then you can turn to how you want to interact with the rest of the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:39 AM
1

That’s exactly what I think of- or some passive aggressive bullshit where he sulks for days before flying off the handle and turning bright red screaming while veins pop out of his head 🙄 hate that shit. Petty. As. Fuck!!!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 09:08 AM
1

Lubed? You’re very kind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:59 AM
14

Haha, I guess a part of “luxury” is uselessly extravagant stuff like that in a bathroom. I think it would be nice to sit on while you did your make up of something lol Maybe I won’t have that particular item but I won’t harsh her vibe either! 😆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:39 AM
3

The very first comment in this thread is by the auto moderator bot. In that comment there is a sentence in blue that talks about “information for registration” if you click on that it should tell you how to get the 8 digit code to register.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:37 AM
5

No, don’t do that! Even if they suck at socializing for WHATEVER reason that’s their own damn fault. You’re being too nice and setting the bar too low for them. Look, I’m an autistic woman, and personally for me learning to socialize was hella difficult and painstakingly hard. However, it was important to me, so put all of my effort into it, read a bunch of books, and did my time to make it work. It’s also a continuous effort. I always look to see how I can improve. Men need to be held to the sa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:32 AM
37

Too. Many. Males. Like. This. They totally killed anime for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:15 AM
9

Ewww just eww also god he’s ugly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 08:00 AM
3

The automod has a link for registration- have you tried using that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 07:56 AM
37

I LOVE that bathroom omg! Looks so sleek and comfortable!! I want to have a high end bathroom like that eventually!! Totally goals!! I also love her outfit. I have always been a huge girly girl, and my Tom-boy mother always HATED that about me. She was a narcissist bitch so anything that wasn’t “her way” could eat shit, but as an adult I have loved learning to like more feminine styles. It was really upsetting to me when I would encounter other women who would hate on anything feminine or girly-…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 07:30 AM
54

Yes, but the reason pickmeishas exist is very much because of the patriarchy. The patriarchy grooms them for this very purpose; in the end it’s all “in a days work” if they get women to hate each more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 07:23 AM
5

I’m not short, and I still find it weirdly tall- I just want someone more on my level... literally, and metaphorically.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/07/20 05:21 AM
6

I’m pretty pissed off that I ever fell for it. Men who are manipulative like that need to go eat dirt. It’s so fucking annoying and rude and just wasted everyone’s time. You can’t ever give them the benefit of the doubt or any iota of kindness because they get an inch and run for miles with it. LVMs ruin everything 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 04:55 AM
25

What is this from? Looks funny
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/20 02:53 AM
8

Wow, I’m not sure I would have seen/understood the “I will disappoint you” one in the past or somehow I would have let it slide like “well, you don’t know that- how do you know? First time for everything 🤷‍♀️” But I think that’s because in my own abuse growing up that’s something my gaslighting abusers would have said to me. When people tell you who they are- believe them!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 09:06 PM
7

Inform him?? What is this a job interview? Fuck him 👋
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 09:26 AM
2

At least he was useful! In one way 🙄 glad he’s miserable now! Narcs deserve their misery more than any being I can imagine in this world. Just desserts 🍨.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 09:21 AM
3

Ha- : )
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 09:12 AM
7

He’s also disgusting and fat- the bastard. A horrible father in the making! A real father like you and other hear have said- would be “on guard” waiting to help, getting help, talking to the soon to be mother or their soon to be born child!!! Like wtf! What a genuinely horrid parent. Does not deserve to have progeny at all.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 08:51 AM
15

Yes!! Exactly! Why aren’t there more of him already?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 08:26 AM
20

Fuck yeah- must have been kinda gross but that’s what you get.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/20 08:15 AM
3

This is hilariously naive - so spot on lmao.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 09:14 AM
2

It’s funny because the only reason I’m on reddit is because 3 other women I knew were on it and recommended certain sub Reddits. Those were good, and surprise surprise either female only/female dominated subs or about dogs/pets or something. Most of my subs are subs for women. Sometimes I read the news on here as well. The men I’ve met that go on reddit- absolute incel types shithole people. I had a few dates- back when I was still kind of pick-meish- and he absolutely blew up on me when I said …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 08:24 AM
4

A pua hitlist?? I’ve never heard of this...this shit goes deeper than I thought... it’s so terribly it’s kind of impressive, in a horrible way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 08:11 AM
10

Thank you! I wasn’t able to find it at my local store to read in person (without buying it) and because of the pandemic- not in a position to just buy book willy-nilly. I’ll look up the pdf version.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 08:00 AM
23

I’m cracking up that he blew his hands off. Talk about just desserts. Sweet sweet karma for once. Imagine being so stupid and simultaneously filled with such rage that you want to be a murderer, but botch it so badly that you end up hand-less 😂. Hysterical.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/07/20 07:29 AM
11

There’s a reason the phrase is: “fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me.” If he did it once he will do it a million times over because he doesn’t really care and doesn’t really want you. He’s toying with you. It’s sick but the truth unfortunately. The fact that he’s done this TWICE already- fuck that he’s a bastard. He genuinely isn’t worth your time. He’s worthless and a jerk try and internalize that. BLOCK. HIM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 10:35 AM
14

Oh god- what shitty red pill tactic is this shit? They have a name for everything. Fuck this shit it’s so petty 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 10:30 AM
11

Fuck no!! Boundaries aren’t something to be “tested” they are BOUNDARIES not a game, not a test, not a suggestions. Boundaries are rules of behavior, rules for “entry” into your life. There are reasons why crossing boundaries without the right documents, procedures etc is illegal in real life. Your boundaries are the same damn thing. If people cross them it is a major offense and grounds for tossing them out of your life no questions asked. “Testing boundaries” is bullshit and the mark of a pred…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 10:25 AM
3

Huh- I got that same feeling, wasn’t sure why. seems accurate tho.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 09:23 AM
8

Ugh- never liked this. I don’t like when tall guys are like “ooooh you’re so much shorter than me huhuhuhu! That’s so hot.” Cause fuck you, you wanna be pedo I’m not a child 🙄 It’s always a weird child-like-woman complex that they seem to have. Also real talk: it’s just hard to kiss guys when they are that tall.... and sex is weird. Nah- not at all my thing. Definitely don’t get it personally, but if it works for you then be my guest! Someone has to take em lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/20 09:20 AM
14

I used to think men wanting ambitious women was a good thing... it’s not. It is just men wanting a woman with a good career so that the woman can be a superstar and bring in a lot of money and then play mommy to him when she’s out of work- it’s ridiculous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 11:48 PM
9

EXACTLY!! I was a hardcore pick-me for this one guy- once- never ever EVER again. If a guy can’t be pissed to text back it’s a deal-breaker. Don’t give a shit otherwise. People have time for what’s important for them. They are signaling you arent important plain and simple. Never believe their bullshit excuses, cause that’s what they are: bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 11:05 PM
8

Jeez, it’s totally true. I don’t like approaching guys at all cause it always nets you people who don’t really try or want to try, in anything in life really. Even when guys DO approach that’s just the bare minimum doesn’t mean anything else will be good. It’s just the beginning.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/20 11:01 PM
3

I hate a lot that this has become normalized in the gay community (mostly by gay men of course), and even younger women (from my experience) constantly saying bitch has been pretty normalized. I really dislike it and there doesn’t seem to be a male equivalent other than calling a guy a dick or dickhead which I have heard a good amount. Doesn’t have the same degrading feel to it because one is in reference to animal and the other a body part.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/20 04:09 AM
2

Damn I need to be friends with you guys! Y’all know what’s up and aren’t putting up with this bs. I like that, also you go! 🙌🎉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 09:44 PM
6

Yes!! I hate being someone fucking place holder like god damn- you asshole people, my time is just as important as yours. I fucking hate this behavior and I can’t believe I put up with it for so long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 08:50 PM
2

Omg has this EXACT issue with a lesbian friend of mine- ex friend now. She was fine when she was depressed and single- but when she got a girlfriend wooooboy did she turn into a total asshole! She kept ignoring my messages when before she would promptly answer them, she suddenly “couldn’t find the time to talk” and was “super busy hope you understand” like fuck that no you ain’t busy bitch you are a trust fund kid and don’t even have a job. She would only want to chat when she had to “decode” a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 08:47 PM
16

This is exactly why I make sure never to involve myself with men in any capacity if I don’t want them to take it the wrong way. I won’t make eye contact, I purposely step farther away from them, nope not dealing with that shit nope nope nope 👎 I’m done with being nice- they always twist it around into some sick shit so fuck em. They ruin it for all of them and have no one to blame but themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 10:02 AM
31

Woohoo 🎉 that is some sweet sweet victory there for her. Loooove when people get their fucking just desserts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 09:47 AM
18

It definitely ain’t sunshine and roses being bi or gay. I’m bi and I would THINK that it would be easier- have your pick of more people -____- there’s a shit ton of bi/homophobia so not really and like lots of men won’t touch you cause “gay” and lots of women don’t want to date you cause “bi chicks always end up with men” like gee thanks a lot. But I do agree most men are low value and pretty trashy so that does not help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 08:58 AM
22

Oh god I have a friend like this and... yeah we are quickly becoming non-friends because his attitude annoys the shit out of me and he has no ambition in life other than continuing to sit at home and keep playing games, complain and whine about being depressed, and do nothing about while his mom makes all his meals for him. 🙄 🙄 but yeah his life is “hard” like bitch please you put no effort in and never leave the house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 08:55 AM
14

Yeah like I’m confused... does he shove them up his ass? Does he rub it?? Somewhere?? Does the dude smell like butter or something?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 04:21 AM
15

Omg yes! Great job 👍 I’m so happy for you : ) So nice to see when other women get this too. Congrats!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 03:15 AM
10

Also he CLEARLY isn’t prioritizing you or anything because “yeah it’s SO busy that I can only do this one time... : (( poor me” Fuck that shit. Everyone has time- everyone. It’s just that they don’t want to make you a priority that’s it. If they really wanted the pleasure of your company they would make it work. They just want an easy lay thats it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 03:14 AM
6

Omg ouch too accurate 😭 I hate so many guys in IT and engineering - they ruin the fields I like most with their presence 😫
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 03:08 AM
5

This is what ragging Narcissists do. They destroy things that mean something to a person because it is a power move and gives them joy to cause misery and suffering in the lives of others. Classic Narc/psychopath move 🙄.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 03:03 AM
3

This is one of those things we’re I would pepper spray the face of the doll and let him use it one last time then bleach it or throw it out idk 😐 dude deserves to have his dick shredded off cause he just screams pedo. No way he could do that and NOT be a pedo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 03:00 AM
10

That is exactly what I thought of- the ever living FUCK is wrong with that depraved sick fuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 02:57 AM
8

She’s so amazing! She inspires me 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/20 02:15 AM
18

The stiletto nails she has make the look for this photo 👌.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/20 02:56 AM
31

I actually read something once about why women shave their armpit hair (generally). It wasn’t standard until the 1920s when women started showing off their scandalous shoulders 🙄 that men invented the razor and then it got into advertisements (shame based) and then as hemlines started to rise above the ankles then it became standard practice for the legs as well. However personally I would prefer if both genders had to shave their pits because people tend to smell... Especially during the summer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 06:47 AM
20

This is literally a narcissistic tactic. It’s selfish as FUCK, and is simply because he saw you as an object- a pretty/sexy doll- to dress as he saw fit. Fuck. That. Shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 06:28 AM
3

Exactly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 05:37 AM
7

I’m always like wtf... when I see people like this. It seems like SO MANY MEN have this problem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 05:19 AM
15

Shit I read this somewhere that this is a sign of mental instability.... I wish I could remember where I read that. However, I tucked it away as some kind of factoid but in the years since it’s always rang true to me. That and when people look like they have no light in their eyes they look dead inside when they are talking about something that “they like” get the fuck out! I’ve only seen that from Narcissists and psychopaths.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/20 04:55 AM
22

This is amazing and so brave of you to do. I’m so proud that you were able to help. It will mean a lot to that woman one day when she finally breaks free. You may even be a pivotal key in her realizing she needs to escape and that people care and when she’s ready will jump to help her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 08:19 AM
10

Completely agree. It’s like when women get at the other woman her boyfriend was cheating on her with. Like bitch NO!!! Get mad at your ex bf for being a cheating asshole!! Direct your anger to the appropriate source.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 04:54 AM
12

Don’t worry it’s for the stupid people in the back who are still having a hard time grasping this concept.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/20 04:46 AM
43

God I think about this so much 😭 if only we spent all that time trying to better our own lives and helping each other or maybe saving the planet. If only.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 10:04 PM
10

I’m completely fine with this! I have friends and other good things in my life- men need not apply.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 07:30 AM
12

Yeah agreed. I don’t watch it but good god the stories I hear about it and the descriptions on here and other places.... it is disturbing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/20 12:49 AM
14

Oof just want to say I massively support all of this but have to check out because it’s waaaaaay too triggering. As a survivor I cannot be really involved in these discussions but thank you for fighting against this evil. We need people who can stand to read these sorts of things and disseminate information because some of us can’t 😔.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 10:00 PM
29

Yeah all of that screams sex slavery to me- I doubt any of those women make it home or even really alive after a while. That’s horrific. I hate porn it’s so fucking evil.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 09:55 PM
23

Yeah it’s such a pity cause I liked how some of my uniforms looked when I had to wear them... but I feel like I can’t even like them because of how pornified they have become. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/20 09:53 PM
7

Fucking EWWW!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 10:22 PM
24

Naw, they aren’t autistic that’s just called being an asshole- an entitled asshole. Also, high-five fellow autistic woman, I know we aren’t rare but it feels like it half the time 😒.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 10:19 PM
21

My only issue with this is that it keeps the onus on women to do every care taking thing regarding children. Not all women want to be special ed teachers. Not all women want to work in preschools. Some of us want to stay in STEM jobs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 10:17 PM
58

😂 thats is exactly what I thought. I was just like “that’s really difficult to do- lady has got some skills!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/20 10:13 PM
2

Ohh okay- it kinda looked like “bi” as in bisexual people of color, but then I was like 🤔 idk about that. Thanks!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 10:45 PM
6

Oh gosh wow I literally read it like she was tired of shitty men or something 😂 this is why language is important geez.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 07:21 PM
2

Okay all those acronyms were confusing. What does DID mean to you? Cause for me it refers to “Dissociative Identity Disorder” like from Mr.Robot... and no clue about BIPOC.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 07:19 PM
4

I feel like Frozen was very good about this and is really kind of the first and maybe only mainstream Disney fairytale that shows a healthy relationship, and isn’t about throwing your life away for a new-found person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 07:14 AM
10

Wow .... that’s horrible, and fuck that. Welp now I know. I would be mildly repulsed by this however, so good to know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 05:47 AM
15

I love that phrase and am glad I learned it here! So useful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 05:33 AM
6

Yep! Same, and honestly I avoid doctors as well because they are usually checked out and largely unavailable because of how the job works- so you’ll always come second. Not to mention being on-call and god it’s just a very difficult job that while it’s very necessary and I appreciate it- don’t want to marry it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/20 05:23 AM
21

Tbh would have lit him on fire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 11:44 PM
38

So even in other countries where going half and half is the norm you still find men who are willing to pay? Very curious about this cause while in some countries men are expected to pay I was wondering what it was like in Europe. Don’t live in Europe but was wondering about the cultural differences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 11:36 PM
30

Yep- I love this tik tok! Women are beautiful they should acknowledge it! It isn’t just for narcissists to feel beautiful. It should be celebrated and women should be comfortable being confident in themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 11:21 PM
10

She’s an amazing woman and a great writer but she definitely completely did not say this quote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:14 PM
10

Well, it seems you were right, and you’ve done completely the right thing! You’ve got a home here and always feel free to post and vent. He’s not worth it, you CAN and will do better and not you have time to focus on all the better things life has to offer. Congrats 🎉🎈🎊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:12 PM
11

Okay, as soon as you said “magical/cheesy” I knew where this was going. A real relationship never happens that quickly- ever. Feelings that develop that quickly that aren’t and cannot be grounded in some sort of long-term potential closely or immediately after the initial meeting are basically dead in the water as soon as they begin. You don’t mention how long things lasted for each phase of this relationship but really you don’t even need to know that to know exactly how this ended. Why? Becaus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:37 AM
7

God yes so much- it’s sad to me however that they ruin and waste other people’s time with this bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:22 AM
9

I think this is simply a matter of the type of narcissism they get sucked into. My parents - whom I am no contact with- are the opposite. My mother was okay-ish in short bursts and my father was a constantly miserable bastard. It’s just different types of narcissism that show in different ways, but it definitely turns into “one bad apple spoils the bunch.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 09:20 AM
8

Oh god that poor fucking girl- it hasn’t hit yet how she has been so manipulated- He’s a sick fuck. He’s currently near my age and I would NEVER date a fucking 22year old fucking hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 07:18 PM
3

Completely agree I could understand shoulder arm hug type thing but she’s literally signaling intimacy with her posturing, big NOPE from me. Also- why the fuck so many? Get your own pictures god.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 07:12 PM
21

I’ve never heard of this... what the heck are they on about? Saturday to go out drinking? I feel like I’m missing somewhere here- like who cares?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 08:41 AM
4

This is just Narcissism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 08:14 AM
7

told him to stop because I hated it. Yep, see that right fucking there should be more than enough. Sure, some autistic people might not completely agree or understand where you’re coming from if they have a completely different view of idk that certain behavior, but in the end if you tell them. Do not do that, it bothers/hurts me, that’s pretty much the end of it. I even dated an autistic guy once, and this exact type of thing came up, and I very bluntly said “It doesn’t matter that you don’t ag…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 09:59 AM
8

Oof this one hurts my soul- as a fellow aspie. I HATE when autistic men use their fucking lack of learning about social rules as a god damned excuse to be assholes. It makes us all look bad, and their just being fucking assholes. Thank you for researching it. And yes it’s true if anything is clearly explained you’ll likely get a profuse apology, and it just plain won’t happen again after that. Sometimes people slip up or make mild mistakes but aspie or not you pretty much always know when that i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 08:43 AM
3

YES YES YES!!! FUCK YES!! God I’m so sick of that shit in general. Never really have to explain what you do to people. Long as it’s legal and you don’t hurt others, fuck it all. You do you. And yes- they god damned heard you the first time. Only repeat on your way out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 08:36 AM
28

I thought about this a lot when I was in the past in a relationship, and I started finding a lot of the things the guy was interested in to be stuff I was taking on... and I wasn’t really sure whether it was my intensely exploratory and curious side diving deep into these new interests......... or whether I was loosing myself in that relationship? So I broke up with him- it kinda freaked me out at the time. To this day, I’m still very interested in those topics and glad I was exposed to them! Bu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 01:59 AM
10

Also half of infertility cases are because the male’s genetic portion is not viable for reasons exactly like age, poor lifestyle choices etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:48 AM
7

Just wanted to say- it happens. I had been feeling the same way actually also about someone from 2018. I find the best thing to do when this comes up is to treat thoughts about that person as an internal trigger for yourself. Make that the automatic trigger for you to redirect to something useful. Whenever you catch yourself thinking that way, say “oh now I’m going to walk the dog to clear my head” or “time for 10 push ups” or “I’m going to go clean the sink/do the dishes” It redirects that ment…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 06:02 AM
17

Naw, it’s apparently 200BC where the idea of sticky notes, directions, and stove tops, and idk maybe non-stick pans “confuse” moronic men. Assholes like that need to be sent to the either the gallows for criminal idiocy and bad faith or put into a home for imbeciles like they did when that was acceptable. I want to badly belief this is a troll comment.... but.... I have met men before.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 04:44 PM
3

Yep he’s got the traditional pedo-stache and all! They love themselves that fucking god awful pedo-stache.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 10:17 AM
140

A silly billy for fucks sake how god damned pathetic. This is just revoltingly low expectations.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 09:15 AM
4

I know! She showed such amazing restraint.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 09:06 AM
15

Damn- that’s it. Wtf that’s so trashy but I’ve known trashy guys who brag about stealing shit and then giving it to their girlfriends sooo this sounds like the same thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/20 08:50 AM
106

I’m not a fan of this method. Where’s the point in all that energy of being passive aggressive when you can just block and move on with your life?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 09:15 AM
2

It’s not that complicated honestly physical abuse usually combined with some kind of sexual abuse as a child leads to this exact kind of behavior. Oftentimes people know this- People write this out all the time online and I had friends who talked about this too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:39 AM
8

Literally because of childhood trauma- that’s why people would be into this- I’ve met people who have said exactly this. It was genuinely sad to hear, and a bit disturbing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 08:23 AM
12

Yeeeeess!! You go!! I’m loving it. Thanks for the update- so proud of you for not caving it! You got this! It gets so much better when you respect and love yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 07:30 AM
9

Omg!! I love this!! I found that before I found this sub- I struggled with loving the memories I had of someone who in the past showed me beautiful parts of themself with their actions and words. However, because or whatever reasons, they slowly became just frankly rude and despondent. Begging for their time and affection was just - ridiculous. My self-respect wasn’t low enough to do that. But I can still love the beautiful memories I have of the good times of that person also while knowing that…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/20 06:52 AM
7

Hahaha! I love this! I’m totally saying this if that ever comes up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 08:45 AM
55

Honestly, I find a lot of women under-estimate how pretty and attractive they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 07:44 AM
7

I agree with your point completely here. It’s so nice when people actually notice and appreciate your accomplishments for sure!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/20 07:33 AM
9

Because they SHOULDNT and they shouldn’t have in the first place. I have ADHD and I can still bath myself dress myself and take care of a house Christ the excuses with these people. It was a hard learning curve trying to figure out how to manage and balance these things in my twenties, but you learn as long as other people aren’t doing it for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 02:40 AM
17

Good god. If he’s so disabled by his neurodevelopmemtal disorder (aka it should get better with age and increasing skills) that he can’t keep himself clean- then he should be in a home for disabled people who can’t take care of themselves at all. Sure as shit shouldn’t be dating. Your therapist is correct- NONE of that has to do with his ADHD. People be using that as an excuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/20 02:34 AM
12

It could also be very much due to trauma.... very sad and unfortunate. Not saying that is the reason in the case of your girlfriend but maybe the girl in the post. It’s a possibility : (
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 08:58 PM
6

Wow!!! Omg I didn’t even think it was possible!! 😳 Glad you found a great guy 👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 02:26 AM
3

The perfect time for: “Sir, this is a Wendy’s”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 10:12 AM
3

Right?! I was like as if you would be anything remotely “fun”. If you are randomly harassing people on Poshmark... nothing about you would be even remotely appealing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 10:09 AM
14

Yeah, they did change- their words and behavior towards you. They ARE remorseful that they don’t have access to you because they got something easy from you be it sex attention or just ego stroking. They miss whatever they were taking from you. If they truly cared or wanted to be with you- you would know- not this crocodile tear BS whenever they get blown off by which ever new chick they are seeing. They have zero respect for you. If they did then they would not hurt you they would be open and h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 10:02 AM
31

I would definitely be interested in this read if you decide to do one!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/20 02:57 AM
54

Naw- do it girl! I do the same thing- as annoyingly and relentlessly as possible. And I will talk louder too. If that doesn’t work, I’ve been known to tap on the offending male’s shoulder and say “excuse you- very rude of you.” And one time I clapped loudly and said in a very loud voice “YOU INTERRUPTED ME- I WASNT FINISHED STOP INTERRUPTING!” Granted I only did that once, and other times I have hadn’t the mental energy for that “battle”, but it’s worth it. The more we do it- the better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 08:29 PM
10

This is actually a common tactic that abusers use. People do feel a need in some sense to “match levels of intimacy”. Therefore, love-bombing abusive types will often divulge emotional/personal things early on and then you feel more intimate with them and bam 💥 they’ve got you emotionally invested and attached. Then after that comes the detachment or devaluation phase. 🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 06:55 AM
3

Wow- I’m late to the party on this one, but it would explain why this sentiment is so common on wider Reddit then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 05:32 AM
9

Well shit- consider me officially reformed! This makes a lot of sense- especially the part about not wanting to spend on kids and the household later. Also, I can’t STAND stingy men. That cheapness is such a shitty characteristic. I’m a generous person and I would like the same in others.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 05:10 AM
38

Yes!! It’s true! Looking at past behavior is often the best indicator of future behavior. I don’t know how or why but it really seems like although people think they change it’s more like they become who they were all along.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:56 AM
32

Any that you particularly have noticed that makes you stay away from certain types of men? I know the obvious red flags, but any other more subtle patterns you’ve noticed?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:55 AM
12

Omg this. I had a few ex-friends like this- I legit couldn’t stand them after a while. ALL THEY EVER DID WAS SMOKE WEED and well just get progressively fatter/older. Oh and talk about how much they hated their jobs. So boring!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 11:41 AM
17

Wow 😳 this is exactly creepily accurate to what I’ve encountered. It’s kinda weird how they are all drawn to the same subcultures- not sure why that is tho. The digital nomad lifestyle just screams non-committal and avoidant personality. When you say ‘sex at dawn’ is that like a song title? Or literally staying up all night and having sex? That’s only I didn’t get lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/20 10:40 AM
5

Oof that’s a good point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 08:25 PM
31

I experienced this from an old sexist boss I once had. I eventually learned that it was because he didn’t like being constantly one-upped and corrected someone 20yrs his junior, and smarter than him. He admitted it eventually later- you’re smart and it’s intimidating. Other men in X (country I was doing business in on a company trip) won’t like it if you won’t at least let them try to feel useful to you. It was an interesting tidbit into how they think. However, I will say that he was right. It …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 08:10 AM
38

That was very cute to read, but some guys do these sorts of things just to be controlling... not sure how to discriminate btwn the two motivation: wanting to add value or being controlling. They look the same on the surface.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 07:56 AM
34

Honestly, not even then. It at first shocked me how many (unfortunately in my experience always black friends) women will hook up with someone with repeat offenses and just overlook it with “well he’s done his time, no need to keep bringing it up.” Or worse “well he’s not doing anything right now” As if past behavior isn’t an indicator of future behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 07:31 AM
2

Thank you, I think this puts some things into perspective for me. I’m very much a go-getter and extremely determined to get to where I want to go- obstacles be damned. Although, my issues do slow this down significantly. However, the excessive time I spent dumping onto other people made that much worse. I felt like I was putting too much into supporting not even partners but just friends. I pushed and pulled friends along because I know what it feels like to not have support, but it would devolv…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 12:28 AM
7

I really do wonder what role mental illness plays in this. As someone with a serious mental illness (bipolar) I know that when it isn’t being treated properly or you’re having an episode or whatever, a lot gets dragged down by that. I wonder how that plays into this. If someone has a break down yeah a lot of their behavior will fall to pieces they won’t be functional. But then you get back on that horse, you get better, and you keep going. What then? Do you just never date people with any proble…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/20 10:10 PM
8

As a rule of thumb- people don’t change. If you see a pattern of behavior even a small pattern- you can rest assured that that’s the baseline of his behavior, and he will always come back to that. Believe patterns of behavior, ESPECIALLY ones that occur by their twenties, I’ve never seen or heard of a person suddenly break out of behavior that had in their twenties. Usually those patterns just become more entrenched over time. Ain’t nobody changing in their late 30s or 40s. If people do change t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/20 09:50 PM
1

Nice, avoiding what I was actually saying with that statement. It is highly unlikely to be the reason for his current behavior. And it is in fact, a small number in comparison to what people assume to be the actual number(aka most or all of abuse victims). But you’re not here to have an actual discussion about this and are purposefully misconstruing what I’m pointing out here. So I’m not continuing this discussion with you beyond this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 08:24 PM
2

Aw man, I missed a chance to bitch slap a motherfucker for making that rude comment. Wish I could have slapped him for you... cause that’s what he minimally deserves. I’m very glad you’re getting out and away from that bastard! Seriously, what a jerk!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 10:16 AM
20

Please stop perpetuating the idea that abuse victims repeat their abuse upon their/any children. This is highly unlikely to be the reason. Only one third of victims of any type of abuse go on to abuse others. The vast majority of abuse victims do not abuse other people. Of all abuse victims of any kind of abuse- childhood male sexual abuse victims,who then go on to have kids and make such comments, are an exceedingly small percentage and is unlikely to be the reason for his behavior here. It is …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 04:53 AM
7

I love your reply! Way to shut that shit down!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 01:45 AM
1

I’m okay with them outing their interests way up front. Then I know to pass on that. I’m very okay with men telling me they have no intentions in dating. I prefer that to the ones who string you along and just lie through their teeth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 08:10 PM
8

Okay, so his behavior is shitty- that’s number one. Two, he’s NOT your friend. And three, he is NOT worth your peace of mind. He probably only reached out because he was: bored, lonely, had nothing better to do. He is showing you he’s willing to dump you whenever with the shitty excuse of “I was busy.” Yeah people are busy- but no one is that busy. If he cared, he would make time, plain and simple. Don’t make the same mistake I did- dump his ass! Both as a friend and potential romantic interest.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 08:04 AM
12

Ugh I fell for this ONCE- never again...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/20 07:13 AM
2

I’m so sorry that happened to you. It 100% reflects upon him- the bastard. I applaud your bravery in getting right back out there and not letting him stop you. You should never let a man stop you from doing the things you love. He was cruel and horrid for what he did, but I’m glad you have the courage to keep going. Also I would recommend therapy from a specifically trauma informed therapist if you find it affecting you more than you anticipated. There’s no shame in it, and when you have a thera…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 08:07 PM
3

I think a number of them take this advise, given all the child-raping priests out there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 07:37 AM
11

Same! I would also like to know!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 05:55 AM
6

Heey! There you go, congrats! 🎉 there are definitely waaay better options out there- and now you’ve freed yourself up to meet those people (after the pandemic lol).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 06:32 AM
35

Guess we have been meeting different flavors of psychopath then. I’ve met/heard about plenty of guys that claim they kick dogs or just outright abuse them. Plenty of people abuse animals of all types.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 11:19 PM
2

It’s okay to feel apprehensive- therapy can be... intense. It does kind of suck doesn’t it? But it’s important to remember that in the end you survived whatever happened, and you’re ultimately stronger than all of it- a lot stronger. Starting up therapy again is the first step in the right direction. Don’t be afraid to shop around for therapists either, with a therapist you should feel comfortable talking to them, but also feel like they are challenging you and making the progress you want to ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 06:56 AM
3

Typically, if the trauma was chronic/started at a young age such that you have chunks of your life still missing from your memory, that usually indicates that you probably have things left unprocessed. Trauma is a difficult thing, and everyone goes at their own pace in the wake of their recovery. It generally isn’t the best to “force” yourself to remember things or uncover things about the past. They usually come with time. However, developing a deep understanding of yourself and devoting time t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 06:21 AM
14

I didn’t really agree with this as being a mark against the other person as a kind of red flag. But it does mean that the person hasn’t processed it yet. However, considering how hard and difficult some lives can be, I don’t think this is a good barometer per say. But it will tell you they have dealt with it yet. I’m not sure if that is a good reason at all to reject a person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 05:51 AM
79

Ugh- not worth it. They commit when they really mean it. Move on- if you haven’t already. He can play the “idk yet” game with any pickmeisha out there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/20 05:37 AM
26

Exactly! And what most men don’t realize is that women would be having a lot more sex/in the mood if it wasn’t so much emotional labor and they didn’t have to take care of man-children so often and so intensely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 09:27 PM
17

This is so important! This is also why I’ve stepped away from dating. I have to work on my myself. It isn’t that having relationship is incompatible with that but that it can be frankly too much to have to honor yourself and then get other people on top of that. Sometimes it works out and you encounter the right person for you who can support you in that, but it can also be a time when an abusive person or just underdeveloped person side tracks you. You don’t want that. You need to be on your be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 09:06 PM
9

Omg that was amazing thank you for that- needed to read that xD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 06:23 AM
-2

That’s bs and not what traffickers do. Also when people get trafficked usually they aren’t looked for and rarely found. It also wouldn’t matter what her perceived age might be because a lot of men raping these children know exactly what they are getting and are there precisely because the victim is a child and looks it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 06:16 AM
35

Wow I thought I was the only person that this had happened to! I said smoking was a deal breaker, and he actually quit. I was shocked- like quit quit. I could tell too. Skin was better, they didn’t smell like cigarettes anymore etc. It didn’t work out for other reasons (nothing bad just 🤷‍♀️ didn’t pan out), but I was shocked didn’t think that people even did that. Clearly this is the minority because I have seen so many friends have the exact opposite happen for them, but still wow!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 05:01 AM
19

I was about to say that 3rd one about not delaying gratification or unable to tolerate your own mental resistance sounds shockingly not mental illness or trauma informed. People have difficulties not simply because they refuse to grow up or something like a narcissist would do but because brains are all kinds of different and things like neurodevelopmental disorders and trauma itself can disrupt growth and development.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 12:37 AM
6

The only thing is that men can be violent (and face few to no repercussions) a the drop of a hat. I admire this response, but it can be unsafe sometimes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 10:30 PM
7

Yeah, I definitely recognize this. You’re very right that women get the shit end of the stick societally and men benefit from and encourage women to settle and that they deserve less. It’s also as you mention, just plain hard to let go of people you’ve grown attached to for one way or another. Humans are emotional beings, and the human need for connection is profound- so much so that we end up taking it from where we can get it when we don’t have our long term priorities straight and our self-va…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 08:36 PM
23

No self respect, and thinking that’s the best you can do. But those are lies we tell ourselves, false stories we’ve convinced ourselves to believe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 05:18 AM
7

Haha! I love this! God damn what a much better way of looking at that!! Thank you for this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 05:08 AM
68

I haven’t heard of the term really in this context, but what do you mean by their partners go through betrayal trauma? The porn industry is so disgusting to me, and I think it is just the exploitation and girls and some women. I didn’t realize how normalized that fuckery has become until I started telling friends about my disgust of it, and they thought I was weird because “everyone watches porn”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 10:19 AM
3

Made me realize that I should never chase after men and that it isn’t worth it to deal with emotionally unavailable men. Someone’s “too much” will be another mans “is that all?”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 10:59 PM
30

I think it’s everything here that we talk about in FDS. He’s attentive, wants to spend time with you, he’s willing and able to spend money on you/take care of you. He seeks you out. He actively pursues you not the other way around. He answers your texts in a timely manner. It doesn’t feel like a chore to get him to respond. He makes time for you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 10:28 PM
25

Oh man! That’s hilarious! And very sad, but entirely their own damn fault.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 06:29 AM
7

A huge part of this can be- setting up boundaries. I’ve personally been on both sides of the fence here. I’ve let people vent to me, and felt drained after an interaction because I never set boundaries or told them when I was done with the conversation out of a misguided sense of needing to help them, but in reality that’s just poor boundary keeping on my end. Then on my end, I’ve had people say it’s okay to talk about something- and even when I asked how they were feeling and was checking in to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/20 05:31 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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