| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 13 | Men and therapyAlso with the rise of teletherapy. Most therapists will meet with you via video call, wherever you are. And most are willing to work on a sliding scale. There’s literally no excuse. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/21 05:09 PM |
| 18 | Men and therapyHaving been in plenty of both kinds of relationships, I simply won’t date any man who isn’t currently in therapy, working on their own stuff. The comparison in quality of men is truly night and day. Therapy requires a level of humility and self-awareness that a lot of men aren’t willing to cultivate. So many will tote “self improvement” but won’t even touch any of the books they purport to have read. And reading isn’t a replacement for actual, personalized therapy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/21 04:52 PM |
| 13 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 27 - Dr. Gail Dines Returns to Take on Porn Culture + Culture Reframed Virtual Conference!Seconding this suggestion. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 07:56 PM |
| 2 | How do you feel about video games?I play them myself, but I quickly can commit some amount of time to them, depending on what else I need to complete in the day. Knowing this balance myself, I look for this balance in the men I date. Also, what someone plays is telling. Does he just like FPS (first person shooters) and get mentally high off killing people? Or does he like an eclectic mix of FPS and RPG (role playing games) and puzzle games? Can he differentiate real life from fantasy? Can he compartmentalize real life from the e… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 07:50 PM |
| 194 | short women. be extra careful about men's "pReFeReNcEs" for your body type.Tall girl here. When I’ve spoken to men about this particular preference in the past, men have literally told me (when prodded about the real reason) was that, “it makes it easier to do the sex acts I want to do.” Some have even made super inappropriate gestures, showing me how that looks in their head. Also, it’s super telling how porn addicted they’ve become regarding this: the smaller (therefore lighter) you are, the easier they can dominate your body/hold you down, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 07:44 PM |
| 25 | Being in a good relationship has made me realize how women are being gaslit on a mass scale to ask for lessI think it’s been stated previously on FDS before, but still holds true: “you’re not asking for too much. You’re just asking the wrong person.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/21 02:10 PM |
| 9 | Times I should have left my fiance“Stupid on purpose” Sis, I cannot 🤣🤣 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/21 07:46 PM |
| 284 | I am dying, girls.How far we have fallen when a grown ass man uses bedsheets as a tissue. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/21 07:25 PM |
| 91 | I am dying, girls.Damn, you beat me to it! 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/21 07:23 PM |
| 80 | Link Between Widespread Attraction to Minors and Eating Disorders?Somewhat related: when I was with certain exes who were viewing porn, my own ED would flare because I subconsciously wanted to look like what they were jacking off to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 04:54 PM |
| 28 | What are some tell tale signs a man is into porn?Jesus Christ, sis. I am so, so sorry. 💔 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 04:51 PM |
| 71 | What are some tell tale signs a man is into porn?I will never understand what’s degrading about loving, passionate “vanilla” sex. To actually see someone, fully see them, be vulnerable together. To take your time with each other. Tantra is absolutely beautiful and I never want to have soulless sex again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 04:39 PM |
| 30 | What are some tell tale signs a man is into porn?When everything can (or does) turn into an innuendo. When they struggle to look you in the eyes. When you do reach the point where you feel comfortable having sex with them, they can’t stay hard, cum too early, try to pull your hair, or anything related to porn. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/21 04:26 PM |
| 21 | 🎵If he's married and you know it, just say no,👏👏 if he's married and you know it...Can confirm. I once went on a date with a guy who only mentioned at the end of dinner that I’d be a “pretty thing on the side.” He already had a wife and kids at home. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/21 12:48 PM |
| 175 | What are some tell-tale/subtle signs of a LV/NV man “warming” you up to physical abuse?Disproportionate reactions to small slights “against” him: getting cut off in traffic, if the food delivered was even slightly off, etc. He felt this innate, insatiable belief that everyone owed him, including me. He would have these intense meltdowns and it was like I could see the fury coming off of him like actual steam. I just knew that would be turned towards me someday. ETA: anger issues are a huge sign. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 04:40 PM |
| 111 | Men always want to tell women how to feel about a problem they causeAnd the very second you say something or react at all, it’s straight up Gaslight City: “not that bad,” and “you’re overreacting.” These kinds of men can never take responsibility for anything. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/21 03:45 AM |
| 19 | Vidyut Jamwal.Ooooh, well hello there, my type. 😘 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/21 08:54 PM |
| 48 | «Please dont make sure Pornhub get shut down because its a nice site for chronic masturbators even if they show underage girls and children»Here’s my thing: I’m in full support of masturbation. It has a bevy of mental and physical benefits. However, you do not need porn in order to do it. Ever. Ever. And the risks to yourself, cognitively, physically, emotionally, and relationally… are fucking not worth it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/21 03:57 PM |
| 247 | ' gOlD DigGeR 'If you give a scrote rent money, He will demand it again for another month. When finding out you come from money, Suddenly everything is “unfair.” 🐁 If the scrote finds out you come from money, Suddenly, it’s your fault he grew up in poverty, It’s your fault he doesn’t want to be a man and pay for his own rent. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/21 01:37 PM |
| 42 | When I Should Have LeftMy heart goes out to you, OP. I relate to so much of this. 💜 Some of my own that I’ll add: I should have left when we weren’t having sex, but you were neck-deep in your porn addiction, then defending it. I should have left when you began to isolate me from my family and friends, telling me that you were the only one who truly understood me. I should have left when you complained that I was “too fat,” then “too thin,” too anything, instead of manipulating my body to make you happy. I should have … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/21 01:14 PM |
| 59 | I will no longer be the only one who doesn't get an orgasm...😂😂🤣🤣 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 08:11 PM |
| 34 | The Dichotomy of Effort: What NVM’s Shared Philosophies Are Really AboutThis also goes out to every mediocre man who has thought, “every no is just a yes waiting to happen.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 08:06 PM |
| 313 | men are self-aware, when they truly want to help, they give FDS type of advice. HVM agree with FDS, only the misogynists whose tricks are exposed by this sub slander it.Here’s the thing: he’s been thinking this the whole time and the only reason it finally was exposed was because they were drinking. He finally felt mentally comfortable enough to air his truth. He just saved you more wasted months or years. Time to leave. ✌️ ETA: when he says, “prefer,” he’s talking his porn preferences, which is even more reason to say goodbye to this loser. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/21 01:11 PM |
| 466 | I am absolutely speechless. Tl;dr, if he can’t have sex with her after a surgery, she will not be allowed to use her cup/tampons. This is straight up abuse.I’m petty as fuck. I would free-bleed on his tshirts as payment for trashing my stuff then. I’m just in awe. When MAH PENIS is somehow in the same lane as tampons/Diva Cups, you cannot be saved. What a child. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/21 05:36 PM |
| 26 | Oh no honey, that’s not something to be proud ofWhen your “husband” is more like an errant teenager who is only motivated by more allowance money… how fucking awkward to be paying your husband to do something he should already do on his own. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/21 12:30 AM |
| 30 | How do you ladies deal with men that always feel entitled to have an opinion in your life?Yessss, I love this tactic. When approached with a neg or unsolicited “advice,” throw it right back in their faces. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 03:09 AM |
| 30 | Stop asking why he did that—start asking if it’s acceptable to youBrilliantly articulated. And especially those scrotes with “dark” souls. Just run. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 03:07 AM |
| 38 | Tonight…I’d say you’re well on your way there, Sis. Remember, it’s not just a destination, but a way of living. 🥂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 03:06 AM |
| 13 | My biggest tip: schedule a first date after another event (work event, going out with friends, etc.)Having plans scheduled with friends after the date also means you won’t be tempted to have him over/go to his place. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/07/21 01:32 AM |
| 42 | "there's a darkness inside me"This is the kind of phrase that makes me turn on my heel and run. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/21 12:10 PM |
| 22 | Woman absolutely destroys her husband after finding out he posts in the deadbedrooms subreddit. Gold.That’s something that has always disgusted me with that sub. You never hear the woman’s side of things: how little he helps with the household, the children, and how contemptuous he acts towards her. All you hear is his sad sob story about, BuT MuH pEniS! Fucking save it, dude. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/21 06:20 PM |
| 16 | Let’s Talk About LVM Exes and When They Come Back After A BreakupYes, they always come back. In my experience, generally after a span of 3-6 months. In a couple instances, it was after a few years. They generally will date 1 or 2 other women (who leave them, too) and then reach out to try to hook me again. Because I have a strict block and delete habit, they generally reach me through a) getting a new number, b) creating a new IG account and reaching out that way, or c) a combo of the two. So what happens is I’m forced to block them again. Too many exes of mi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/21 02:07 AM |
| 144 | You weren’t cheated on, HE IS A CHEATERAgreed entirely. With phrases like “she was raped/cheated on,” it leaves the actions far too abstract. We need to keep the blame on the perpetrators and remove any trace of victim blaming. She didn’t cause the rape. He did. She didn’t make him cheat. He chose to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/21 02:01 AM |
| 7 | Man asks out women on COFFEE dates, complains about them sitting across from him, judging his job, giving him aunt hug on way out & BLAMES them for turning him into an acquaintance instead of a romantic partner 🤣🤣🤣 Has he heard his voice or seen himself in the goddamn mirror?🤡💩Scrote: asks for a low effort coffee “date” Also scrote: why didn’t this platonic hang out turn into romance?! 😱💔 ETA: for all you lurkers, romance stems from romantic gestures. Women want to be wooed. If you ask us “out” for coffee, we’re only to assume we’re meeting as friends and that’s all. Don’t be surprised when we keep you in the box you’ve placed yourself in. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/06/21 04:17 PM |
| 78 | A Case for "Vanilla" SexTantra: having sex with someone BDSM: doing sex to someone When I fully accepted this, I no longer wanted anything to do with bdsm. And after having several soulful tantric sex sessions, it’s all my body longs for. The tension, the level of vulnerability between partners, builds so much trust. The orgasms end up being explosive. You come away from tantra feeling closer to your partner instead of used. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 11:47 PM |
| 42 | Apparently all girls want to have violent sex 🙄 It's not cool enough to be vanilla /sYeah, I totally want the kind of sex where I’ll have to file an insurance claim & rush to the hospital. /s | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/06/21 01:57 PM |
| 48 | It’s Unfortunate How Many LVM/NVM Know What Women Want (An HVM), Pretend To Be It, And Then The Facade Slowly ErodesI wish I could say it’s the former, but time is proving it’s the latter. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/06/21 02:12 AM |
| 90 | It’s Unfortunate How Many LVM/NVM Know What Women Want (An HVM), Pretend To Be It, And Then The Facade Slowly ErodesI’m in this same headspace. It seems as I’ve raised my standards, the guys will parade as the HVM. So, I’ll get sucked in and feel hopeful again, only to be sorely disappointed and heartbroken again 2-3 months down the line. The mask slips and I can finally see the issues, the addictions, all of it. It’s extremely harrowing. I’m beginning to acquaint myself to the idea of staying single for the rest of my life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/06/21 01:10 AM |
| 106 | Why we should quit the diets/eating habits that make us miserableI’m so glad someone is finally bringing this up. I’ve dealt with an eating disorder for most of my adult life, and recovery meant ditching the scale, tape measure, etc., and finally making peace with food. I’ve found activities to stay fit that don’t feel like torture, and don’t watch the calories I’ve burned. I’m there for the fun and mental benefits. The food part can be harder, as intuitive eating is something we have to relearn. Definitely speak to a registered dietitian who specializes in i… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/21 02:41 PM |
| 56 | To the young ladies, do NOT fall into this trap, I’m begging you!Even more reason to get it, IMO. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/21 01:13 PM |
| 382 | To the young ladies, do NOT fall into this trap, I’m begging you!Age gap ✅ Baby trap ✅ Marriage after a kid ✅ He cheats ✅ Doubts if she should leave 🤦♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/21 01:05 PM |
| 4 | Older queens if you woke up as a 20 year old again, what would you have done differently?I would’ve kept my head down and finished my education. I would’ve said no to the first dude I married (and the second!). I would’ve taken lots of trips on my own, exploring and seeing the world. Then, after graduate school, maybe would’ve peeked my head up in the dating scene. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/21 02:56 AM |
| 10 | Date a man who is proud of youThank you ☺️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/06/21 05:42 AM |
| 82 | Men are grossI dated a guy like this, and when asked about those spots, he said he didn’t want to “waste the toilet paper.” Dude, you fucking used the bathroom. Wtf do you think it’s even for then? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/21 10:21 PM |
| 99 | 2 days ago our haters said we would never get Gail Dines on the Podcast and we all laughed because the episode was already recorded and scheduled to be released today. Haters gonna hate while FDS just keeps winning! 📈🚀🧗♀️This was, by far, my favorite podcast episode. The discussion was so productive and validating. And confirmed so much for me: we want more from guys because we know, if they wanted to, they could do better. I love Momma Gail. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/21 07:00 PM |
| 65 | Message to ladies and lurkers: All orgasms are not created equal!I swear by my magic wand to thoroughly warm up, and then continue with my favorite d*ldo and (ironically named) Womanizer clit vibe. Plus, sexy music, usually some weed or wine, and just taking my time, loving on myself. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/21 02:08 AM |
| 97 | Message to ladies and lurkers: All orgasms are not created equal!Tailing on to confirm about the intense orgasms with edibles. 💥 It’s nice to get out of my head for a bit and be fully in my body. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/06/21 02:03 AM |
| 97 | Dating a woman and ignoring the men who want me has been the best dating decision I’ve ever made.This speaks to my shy-Bi heart. One of my goals this year is to become more outspoken and assertive about asking other women out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/21 09:03 PM |
| 295 | If he wanted to, he would!Even better: men who don’t need to be asked to do things for you. Instead, men who ask how they can help, and intuit things that will help you out by paying attention. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/06/21 09:02 PM |
| 7 | He'll always find a mother...😂😂💀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/21 03:40 PM |
| 22 | Yes Queen! You deserve more than a $5 date. Swipe to see the scrotes’ responses“Free meal” = I only want to get my dick wet and can only afford to get her a latte. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/21 03:36 PM |
| 172 | Worst proposal ideas 💀Regarding the sporting event: how fucking selfish can you be? She now has thousands of people, staring at her, waiting for her to say yes (when she most likely is in shock and honestly wants to say no). Way to add extra pressure there, scrote. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/21 03:33 PM |
| 16 | How FDS helped me recover from an abusive relationshipI’m proud of you for finding the strength in yourself to leave him. I know in the thick of it, you begin to question yourself and your ability to leave, as well as beginning to doubt how bad it really is. My heart goes out to you as you continue to heal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/05/21 05:49 PM |
| 294 | A picture is worth a thousand words...Oof. And also, there’s not a day that passes where I don’t wish it was that simple. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/05/21 01:39 AM |
| 178 | I Am So Tired of Hearing About Their Damn Penises!!!Imagine being so obsessed with some spongy flesh on your person, that you use it as a point of conversation any chance you have. For some of these guys, having grown a penis is the best thing they’ve ever achieved in life. The moment the Meat Sword Talk begins, I walk out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/05/21 12:44 PM |
| 331 | How would you ever be able to trust him again? Disgusting.And he’s only “sorry” because he was caught this time. I bet you anything he’s been hiding other stuff from her this whole time, and will continue to do so, if she makes the poor decision to stay. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 06:10 PM |
| 195 | How would you ever be able to trust him again? Disgusting.Great job, you disgusting POS. Ruining 2 marriages in one go. Another disgusting plea of, “muh penis!” I hope she listens to her gut and divorces him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 06:09 PM |
| 30 | OLD - is it LV behavior when men ask this? What’s your experience/opinions on it?Eastern European here, and this question is the absolute worst, especially when it turns into an interrogation. The guy is very likely trying to rack up points by getting with you. Having sex with anyone “unique” gives him bragging points with his bros. I always use this opportunity to text my best friend our code word, and she’ll call me and help me gtfo of there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 01:13 PM |
| 48 | Posted on FDS a few months ago during a breakup. We broke up. I bought my own house and took possession this weekYES! Congratulations! 🎉🥂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 01:05 PM |
| 72 | The guys who get the most mad about "generalizing men" are the ones where the generalization 100% applies to them 😂If they weren’t guilty, they wouldn’t get defensive. Period. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 12:47 AM |
| 15 | Hard and Fast TruthsYES!! I’m so proud of you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/21 12:34 PM |
| 14 | Why I only accept dinner dates when vetting a man.Absolutely! Steal away! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 04:40 PM |
| 80 | Why I only accept dinner dates when vetting a man.Redpillers and MGTOWs will “flaunt” about their “plates,” yet can only afford a paper cup. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 03:42 PM |
| 38 | really important message to internalize especially if you've been through abusive relationships!Yep, I love this. Love isn’t how much we can accept, endure, and how much we can bite our tongue. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 03:39 PM |
| 125 | Internalized misogyny starts early in a girl's life and trains her to value the opinions of others always over her own. It takes time and unlearning to overcome this - be patient with yourself!It seems like the older I get, the less I give a flying fuck about the opinions of others, especially men. But I’ve given up many things/hidden things I’ve loved: flowery prints on clothes, pink things, sparkly things, “girly” drinks. At some point, I just stopped giving a fuck about being “basic,” and embraced all that I love. I will wear the heels and the flowery dresses. I will have the pink nails. And I will drink the girly drinks. Because that feels the most “me.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 03:37 PM |
| 14 | How do you respond when men ask questions or make comments about your intelligence?In the same field as you, and the disparaging commentary gets ridiculous. I’ve come to the point where I honestly don’t tell them what I do and research until some solid time together. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 09:51 PM |
| 26 | Do not read or entertain essays from low value menI’ve had so many scrotes in my inbox since I posted about my breakup this weekend and the subsequent PA signs post yesterday. I have messages and chats turned off, though, so none of them come through. But I’m enjoying the fan mail, knowing I really hit a tender nerve with so many of them. ✌️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 09:46 PM |
| 3 | How to Spot a PALooking back, so do I. But at least we know better now and can choose better men (and what to watch for). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 09:42 PM |
| 16 | Surprise her!😂😂💀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:40 PM |
| 7 | How to Spot a PAYou brought up so many awesome points here. In regards to the lack of cuddling after, it seems that when a man’s first (and maybe only) dose of sex education is porn, he doesn’t learn that healthy adults use sex (and the proceeding cuddling) to get and stay connected emotionally to each other. In porn, the guy cums and the camera shuts off. And so for PA, they only think, “end scene.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:21 PM |
| 5 | How to Spot a PAThere seems so be so much overlap between porn viewership and infidelity. I’d like to conduct a study sometime in my grad school studies regarding this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 07:18 PM |
| 2 | How to Spot a PAAwesome articulation! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:59 PM |
| 3 | How to Spot a PAOr if they mention wanting to take pictures or video during, and frame it in a sentimental way. No, dude, you aren’t keeping naked pics/vids of me on your device. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:59 PM |
| 4 | How to Spot a PAExactly. But it absolutely couldn’t be the porn, could it? /s | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:58 PM |
| 3 | How to Spot a PAGod, yes. I became squeamish over eating bananas in front of an ex because of this exact reason. Seems so innocuous, but they immediately imagine BJ scenes. 😬 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:56 PM |
| 6 | How to Spot a PAI feel the same way. I’m just glad we both got free. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:37 PM |
| 3 | How to Spot a PAExactly. I tend to throw their gross judgment back in their faces with comments like that: “why is her weight our issue?” and watch them stumble on their words. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 01:02 PM |
| 9 | How to Spot a PAYour whole last paragraph. I couldn’t relate more. I miss the loving, connected sex, too. I have hope that we’ll both have that again someday, but I’m making peace with the option that we might not. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 12:53 PM |
| 20 | How to Spot a PAYes! One I didn’t even think of. Also... hair pulling. 😬 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 04:45 AM |
| 10 | How to Spot a PAYes! The speed in which they respond, and also the tone of the response. The nonverbals also generally give it all away. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 03:13 AM |
| 27 | How to Spot a PATotally agree. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 12:17 AM |
| 88 | How to Spot a PAHaving the lights on during sex would require him to acknowledge that you’re a breathing, living human with emotions and sensations of your very own. I’ve realized this one, too. Lights out takes the vulnerability out of sex. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:40 PM |
| 42 | How to Spot a PAYes! Especially so when the rest of their place and life is a total wreck. But their porn collection? Pristine, alphabetized, and categorized. The priorities are glaringly obvious. I remember working on homework a few years ago on one of my ex’s desktops and stumbled across one of his porn folders. I’m not ashamed to say I deleted quite a bit of it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:15 PM |
| 34 | How to Spot a PA“How dare you snoop into something I know I shouldn’t be doing?” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:09 PM |
| 40 | How to Spot a PAOof, yes. The hidden folders that are so conveniently encrypted. And also the disparaging bed times. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:06 PM |
| 33 | How to Spot a PAHe did that as if to say, “this belongs to me.” 🤬 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:04 PM |
| 28 | How to Spot a PAAll of mine, too. Solidarity. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:02 PM |
| 65 | How to Spot a PAYES. Especially the turning of the mundane conversations to a sexual nature. 👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:02 PM |
| 135 | How to Spot a PAHoly fuck. Imagine jacking off so hard and so often that you’re literally rubbing the skin right off. 😬😱 And yes to the “pooping” for an hour. Like, I have IBS. I know rushing to the bathroom. But an hour? Absolutely not. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 11:00 PM |
| 3 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Accepting all the hugs. Thank you for such wise and thorough advice. 💖 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 09:35 PM |
| 3 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Yes we are. We absolutely are. 💕 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 09:34 PM |
| 6 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.👸 Thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 06:09 PM |
| 10 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.It’s important to me (and to our cause) that we get as much lived experience and scientific evidence about this topic in order to help each other up. So, thank you again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 03:41 PM |
| 17 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.No worries! I’m going to create a much bigger post soon about all I’ve learned from past experiences in how to spot a PA. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 03:39 PM |
| 31 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.I realized he began taking his phone to the bathroom much more frequently. He became obsessive over keeping it on him, or when away from it, it was face-down. Little things like that would sit in the forefront on my mind, and so I became curious. That’s what led me to eventually ask him about views on porn. No one needs their phone (especially a dude) just to pee. Things just really began to feel a tinge sour and “off.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 02:23 PM |
| 27 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Most likely. If he didn’t have the integrity to “own” his porn viewing, he will become much more secretive about it going forward. Especially since he didn’t see anything wrong with watching it in the first place. The hole runs deep for those who are in denial. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 01:46 PM |
| 68 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Thank you. It’s taken me a long time to finally realize that the majority of their scare tactics are all just projection of their own worst fears. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:56 PM |
| 9 | Make them call you MASTER 🎓 I finally did it, ladies! 😀😁Congratulations! What a huge accomplishment! 🎉🎊 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:46 PM |
| 35 | Weekly FDS Check-inIt’s my first day at a highly-competitive internship, so I’m pretty stoked for that. After that, work and school. Tonight, finalizing a summer vacation with my best friend. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:40 PM |
| 19 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Stick around. You’ll gain the strength needed to finally walk away. 💖 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:33 PM |
| 28 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Don’t you dare apologize. This was a fantastic analysis. Thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 12:18 PM |
| 95 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Hopefully she’s just as strong and stubborn as I am. We suffer no fools here. We will not settle. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 04:41 AM |
| 92 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.I’ll look back at this as part of my Spring Cleaning 2021. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 04:39 AM |
| 196 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.This was exactly my experience. Three months later and I walked in on him jacking off, supposedly after he’d “stopped for me” 👋🏼 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 04:37 AM |
| 248 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.I’ve been in that particular situation before, and the guy lied about stopping just to keep me around, so no. It’s the consumption and the defensiveness surrounding it for me. They know it’s wrong, or they wouldn’t need to defend their stance. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 04:35 AM |
| 176 | He picked porn, so I chose myself.Gotta love those mental gymnastics: a full on cumer connoisseur, but wouldn’t dream of dating a porn star. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 04:32 AM |
| 64 | Ladies, what are your physical preferences?Over 6’2”, dark hair, muscular but not super jacked, neatly groomed facial hair, can rock a suit just as well as weekend clothes, and that pelvic V is chef’s kiss 💋 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/21 04:33 PM |
| 32 | You weren’t asking for too much- love and attention are necessities ❤️✨Yes to all! I had an awesome professor that noted, “foreplay is everything that happens/is said after intercourse.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/21 01:49 PM |
| 42 | HOW THE HELL HAS NO-ONE POSTED KEANU YET? Seems like a dope af person, too.I have always had a huge thing for Keanu. He’s essentially my gold standard of character to compare men to: humble yet extremely successful, good sense of humor, down-to-earth, keeps his life private. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/21 01:42 AM |
| 1 | I don’t want his name on my doctorate.In the same position as you. I decided to take my mother’s maiden name for this reason. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 01:42 PM |
| 39 | To My Divorced Women- How Are Things?I am free. And that is a feeling I’ll keep nourishing and reminding myself of anytime I begin to think of remarrying. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 12:27 AM |
| 9 | TAKE NOTE OF THE MEDIA A MAN CONSUMES: A LIST OF RED FLAGS TO WATCH OUT FOR IN 2021I’ve now had two different guys give me glowing reviews and recommendations of Jordan Peterson, but I still don’t have a clue who tf he is. Can someone give me a brief rundown? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/21 01:57 PM |
| 191 | Women are choosers and it literally does not matter what men wantIn every single other animal kingdom on this planet, the male species are the ones who have to fret over being chosen, and so they go to extreme lengths in order to be picked, and therefore mated with. (Look up Birds of Paradise mating dance, for an example.) And humans used to follow this exact tradition. Somewhere along the line, men became extremely lazy with actually courting women, and somehow flipped the script as if it’s our responsibility to hold the man’s attention and to get him to cho… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/05/21 01:02 PM |
| 77 | Beware!Been there, done this. Never again. ✌️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/21 03:57 PM |
| 25 | The freeze responseIt’s essentially a survival attempt to win the perp’s attention and affection. The whole trope of, “no, please, I’ll do anything you say.” Perhaps building up their confidence in attempts to sway them from attacking. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/21 01:43 PM |
| 92 | The freeze responseThe flight/fight/freeze/fawn response is part of our sympathetic nervous system, and for the most part, is entirely out of our control. There’s no morality in the choice your brain and body makes in that second. But I know that all of us would easily choose to “fight” if given the choice. I think for this purpose, we need to keep things like stun guns, pepper spray in our purse so, no matter our reaction, we can attack back in some way. There’s a great podcast episode about this, with Brené Brow… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/05/21 01:36 PM |
| 94 | It's not normal for half the world's population to live like prey animals, only cause the other half can't control themselves.Imagine a life where you could go for walks or runs at night and not worry that you’d be stalked, raped, or killed. Imagine being able to wear what you like and not be ogled, followed, or harassed. Imagine being able to live your fullest life without constant fear. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 10:39 PM |
| 97 | To counteract liberal feminists and beta males trying to manipulate us into thinking "dad bod" is the hottest male form, we will be instituting one day a week to post photos of actual hotties! Let us know what we should call it!Is it bad that the first thing I thought of was simply, “men who actually give a damn about looking decent”? Totally not catchy, but it’s so refreshing to see men who inspire lust, who care about their physiques. Or how about, “I would lick those abs”? Because Dad Bod is a way to “sexify” a beer gut. 🤢 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 08:59 PM |
| 60 | A guy once told me, "I'm the last thing you need right now." Then got mad when I said, "Okay."bE My oNly SouRcE oF seLf-eStEem! 🤡 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 01:23 PM |
| 12 | This Scrote on Psychology Today has “concluded” that size doesn’t matter ladies!Also, let’s not forget the bias in surveying: did he ask women directly to their face? They probably didn’t feel comfortable explaining further, especially to this creep. Did he simply poll all of his FB friends? Ask random women on the subway? Plus, that’s hardly a sample size worth mentioning and not a fair assessment to create a statistic, anyway. This is all anecdotal, probably made up bullshit just to ease his own broken ego. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 01:21 PM |
| 42 | P*rn Use Is So Similar To Alcohol Use/Alcohol AbuseYou don’t get any gold stars for trading one addiction for another one, then thinking it’s somehow a step up in morality. Especially not porn use. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 05:22 PM |
| 32 | Why... are men ??? 🤢😳Nice job in using a woman’s grief for your sick sexual pleasure. 😳 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 02:24 PM |
| 228 | Don’t tell men about your standardsI can’t emphasize the “silent” part enough. Besides putting yourself at possible grave danger when a creep LVM retaliates or begins to stalk you, there’s no point in debating your worth and boundaries with a man- any man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 11:01 PM |
| 2 | Poor girlBecause if they said how they truly felt about him, they’d answer their own question. If you have to reach out to an advice columnist, have to Google advice because of his behavior or actions, you already instinctively know it’s time to leave. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 02:43 PM |
| 1 | Thoughts on changing your name when you get married?I did this before, and refuse to do it again, even if the guy is HV. Even in marriage, I am not someone’s property. A truly HV man wouldn’t make a fuss out of me keeping my name anyway. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 02:37 PM |
| 37 | NYT: Women Who Said No to MotherhoodThis is so timely to me, as I finally (as of this year) found a gyno who approved to sterilize me. This has been 10 years, and probably just as many doctors, in the making for me. Every time I’ve tried to get sterilized prior, I’d be shut down with the following: “But what does your husband think about it?” “We’ll consider it after a kid or two.” “You’re still too young to be making a decision like this.” “We need your husband’s consent first.” 🤔 By the end of this month, I’ll finally be free. W… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 12:53 PM |
| 82 | What did he expect when he told her he wanted to sleep with another woman ?I’m beaming with pride with her leaving. Here’s the part that pisses me off, though. How, at the end, he wishes he just never shared that detail to her. What, so she can go on thinking you still love and value just her while secretly wanting to fuck other people? Thank god the truth came out. She deserves to be free. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/05/21 02:03 PM |
| 103 | My small guide for the "BIG" event of meeting the family.All great advice. I’m meeting some of the family this weekend, so I’m beginning to prepare for it now: fresh manicure, outfit and hairstyle picked out. That’s the easy part for me, always has been. Now, the challenge is to turn into the quiet observer and watch how they talk and joke and about what, and see if this is a good family match for me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/04/21 12:51 PM |
| 15 | Women, Especially Trauma Survivors, Don’t Need Further GaslightingI know exactly this feeling. It’s truly infuriating, and honestly makes whatever you’re going through feel worse. What I’ve learned is to be a truly emotionally resilient person is having to experience the full gamut of emotions. And to never gaslight your own experience or emotions, but to sit with them, be ok with them. They don’t last forever, but they are real and need to be honored as such. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/04/21 02:35 AM |
| 100 | ⚠️The audacity of these men...I’m beyond TIRED. I had to block him. I just can’t understand why they think this is okay...⚠️Meaning: “I want the appearance of a GF in public so I get all of the social clout and none of the tough, emotional burden” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 11:21 PM |
| 36 | Women, Especially Trauma Survivors, Don’t Need Further GaslightingWhat they get is exactly what you said- your silence. The point is to become so ruthlessly outspoken about your experience, sometimes at the cost of LV people, that the masses can no longer ignore us. So that we can eventually cause large, positive change, for ourselves, our sisters, our daughters, and our nieces. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 11:01 PM |
| 198 | Women, Especially Trauma Survivors, Don’t Need Further GaslightingA page from the narcissistic scrote’s playbook is to gaslight you into toxic positivity. Think of the guys who are always saying that women complain too much, or are too negative. Nah, scrote, we’re just telling you about our actual experiences. A brilliant quote from Dr. Susan David that I keep coming back to is, “toxic positivity is saying, ‘my comfort matters more than your reality.’” Reread that, again and again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 09:32 PM |
| 89 | This is why we must be extremely careful about the kind of men we procreate with, lest this happens. She's still trying to hang on instead of divorce. Meanwhile some pickme in the comments is saying they could "bOtH bEnEfIt fRoM cOuNseLinG." OP has suggested it, but surprise, he never went.This piece of shit is the very core of why I will never babytrap myself to any man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 08:57 PM |
| 62 | “Just give him a week”When I was still dating, I gave the guy no longer than 48 hours to get back to me, then I immediately moved it along. And in doing so, you don’t continue to romanticize the person for who they truly aren’t and the work they aren’t putting in, and you free yourself up to find the person who actually will put in that work and effort. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/21 04:29 PM |
| 3 | 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥READ THIS FOR A CHANCE TO APPEAR ON THE FDS PODCAST! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥YES YES YES! And hello, fellow future therapist! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/21 12:16 AM |
| 5 | 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥READ THIS FOR A CHANCE TO APPEAR ON THE FDS PODCAST! 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥As someone who has had several therapists over the years, and is now in-training to become one herself, I think I might bring an interesting perspective to the failure of women and therapy conversation. 🙋♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/04/21 12:14 AM |
| 12 | Ladies, can I please hear your success stories on divorcing abusive partners?I’m not one to ask for help, but it got to the point that I finally broke down and confided in friends, in my mom, just how bad things truly were. And when I realized that other people knew and had my back, I began to formulate a plan for leaving, but kept everything “calm” and “normal” at home. Once I had a secure place to go, I drove/ran away and had divorce papers served on my behalf. I only took the bare necessities: birth certificate, passport, a week’s worth of clothes (generally stayed wi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/21 02:25 PM |
| 30 | Any other shattered women finding FDS “late” in life?In my thirties also and I absolutely relate to this gnawing feeling of betrayal. I wish, more than anything, that anyone would’ve warned me early on just how bad it really is. I could’ve kept myself from marrying the wrong man... a few times. But they (media, the church I grew up in, my family) kept up the romanticism, and I bought into it. And I hate myself for that. But more than the hate, I’m proud of myself for having the strength to stand up and leave. Several times. At the heart of every P… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/04/21 02:06 PM |
| 29 | Women who have experienced trauma, what have been some of your levelling up wins?Therapy has been pivotal for me in processing the emotions of coming from a super dysfunctional family system, and later on, divorce and the abuse that occurred within that marriage. From personal experience, it wasn’t until I sought after a trauma-informed therapist when my mental health truly began to improve. The other therapists I’d seen where validating of my experiences, but it wasn’t until my current therapist where I have felt myself actually shift into forward progress. She gives me the… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/04/21 01:27 PM |
| 58 | Pay extra attention to how he talks about his ex! [from Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft]The very second a man refers to a woman as crazy, that’s your cue to turn on your heel and fucking run. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 11:12 PM |
| 57 | "A WOMAN turns 18 every minute". Suddenly they're calling us women not FeMaLeS when they want to justify paedophilia 🤢🤬Something I’ve realized: they will use “females” when we become an obstacle to them, something to maneuver or push around. They will use “women” when we become a conquest, a trophy to obtain. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 11:09 PM |
| 47 | OLD Red Flag Words & PhrasesLike it was said in the podcast: “here for a good time, not a long time.” More like... here to waste your time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 11:04 PM |
| 31 | How do you learn how to control/manage your emotions?I second the therapy suggestion, but also... from the way you described your situation, it sounds like you’re neck-deep in grief, Sis. It’s so normal and something most (if not all) of us on this sub have to deal with and reckon with when we realize we’ve been settling. I’ve been where you are. Realize that you’re very much not alone in these feelings and that they are absolutely normal. Give yourself time to grieve what you thought you wanted, then get to work at making an escape plan. Knowing … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 06:32 PM |
| 48 | I'm a porn addict, my wife forced herself to watch with me instead of asserting healthy boundaries. Now we are divorcing, she resents me. It couldn't have been the porn. Anyone? 🤡Replace every “we” with “me” and you’ll figure out his real story here. He’s off gallivanting across the globe, while she sits back and does the hard work here. $10K is scraps for what he put her through. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/21 12:52 PM |
| 319 | I am BOILING. Ad that came up on my fb feed. A five year old with eye bags that need correcting?? The grooming starts so young. Thankfully they got dragged in comments.Is it any wonder that the majority of us ladies suffer from body dysmorphia? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/21 12:44 PM |
| 120 | What's the WORST COSMO ADVICE you've ever seen on the topic of dating, sex, and relationships?That anal sex would strengthen the bond I have with my man. To keep “trying it out” even if I didn’t like doing anal, or anything remotely in the ballpark of anal. hahahahahahahaha No. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/21 01:54 AM |
| 3 | Where to meet HVW? What are their green flags?Sorry! Read the post and the question prior to coffee. Will be editing my post ASAP. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 06:57 PM |
| 1 | Pickmeism, Sunk Costs and the Ego in RelationshipsExactly! And just like you, I often wished my dad would’ve died also while growing up. I saw how badly my mom was hurting and wanted more than anything to take that away... which meant him leaving the picture entirely. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/21 02:47 PM |
| 32 | Pickmeism, Sunk Costs and the Ego in RelationshipsThis is all fantastic. I particularly want to speak to the “we have kids together” bit. As someone who was raised in a highly dysfunctional family, with a father who I feel could’ve invented and patented emotional abuse and triangulation, my mom still recounts that she stayed with him as long as she did because she wanted “to keep the family together.” Together for what? Experiencing hell? For her kids to grow up thinking what my dad did and my mom accepted was somehow ok? I heard a quote the ot… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/04/21 02:18 PM |
| 329 | here’s why Scrotes NEGGMen: Wow, you’re gorgeous Me: I know 🥰 Men: shocked Pikachu face | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 11:02 PM |
| 181 | They hate confident women because they can’t control us!Reminds me of all of the Tiktoks and YouTube videos, teaching LVM how to neg women. Gaslighting 101. Thankfully, there’s enough of us smart enough to see it for what it is (you’re not witty, Adam, you’re just an asshole) and we swerve.👋🏼 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 10:57 PM |
| 84 | Her pornsick cheater will send her to an early grave and she's still internalizing all of his abuse...This is one of the most invasive, insidious parts of men who view porn: the lasting, horribly negative ramifications it has on their partner/GF/wife. He’s only thinking about his dick, but now her whole life and health and wellbeing revolves around and resorts back to his incessant porn use and affair. Men don’t realize the tiny seeds they are planting within their relationships when viewing porn, because they then begin to view their partners/GF/Wife differently. An unfair trade off doesn’t eve… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/04/21 01:11 PM |
| 58 | You don’t know him yet! Why it’s important to emotionally detach yourself from him during the early stages of courting himTrauma Bonding is one hell of a hard thing to break free from. I hope your sister can find peace and freedom from this man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 11:29 PM |
| 177 | This is why you shouldn’t take other peoples opinions about your body seriously.You literally cannot win with men, so you might as well do exactly what makes you the most confident and mentally healthy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/21 02:49 PM |
| 13 | Can "workaholics" be HVM? ...an anecdotal inquiryHaving needs does not make you needy. And feeling (because his actions, not words, prove it) like a priority in his life is important. If he’s not making gestures to solidify the groundwork now to fit you into his life, it’s safe to say he’ll put work above you, above a potential future family together, and so on. Their actions tell us who they are, not who we wish they were, and not what they say. If he’s not actively setting aside time for you everyday, then you know where you stand. Does he h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 05:54 PM |
| 97 | Pew pew. And then you eventually get sick of it, question your up bringing, invest in a good vibrator and call it a day.And what they are really saying is: My pleasure > Your safety | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 02:21 PM |
| 46 | Scrote so mad he forgot how to spell and shitlittarly | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/04/21 02:56 PM |
| 53 | STOP 👏🏻PROCREATING 👏🏻 WITH 👏🏻 SHIT 👏🏻 MENMy thoughts are that she’s actually afraid of his rage, so she wants to broach this subject gently as not to set him off further. I don’t know too many mothers who, when faced with their child being dropped yet again, wouldn’t go full Mama Bear and verbally slaughter anyone that dropped or hurt their child(ren). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/04/21 12:59 PM |
| 24 | Scrolling through tik tok and all the top comments are saying to leave him and that this isn’t healthy or good for her. I am LOVING that we are telling the younger generations that they don’t have to deal with their porn obsessed boyfriends. 🥰Also, pay close attention to his semi-threatening “babe?” while she puts him on blast. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 10:23 PM |
| 58 | Scrolling through tik tok and all the top comments are saying to leave him and that this isn’t healthy or good for her. I am LOVING that we are telling the younger generations that they don’t have to deal with their porn obsessed boyfriends. 🥰More than that: he deflects and says, “haha now let’s look at yours!” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 10:04 PM |
| 43 | Thought you ladies might like this. Men mad that women are focusing on themselves instead of men.Hold the fuck up. The photo used is one of our own sisters here, showing off the gorgeous ring she bought for herself. These scrotes know no limits. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/01/21 10:57 PM |
| 25 | NVM expects her to practically hand feed him every meal. I have no words.That’s what I was thinking, too. I kept waiting to read the paragraph where he makes her bib him up and perhaps serves him his beer in a sippy cup. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/12/20 02:53 AM |
| 107 | When dating, ask yourselvesDoes he leave me on read? Is he someone I’d want my daughter/niece dating? Do I trust him enough to be vulnerable with him? Is he genuinely vulnerable with me, too? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/20 09:15 PM |
| 45 | Her man of 6 years faked a proposal. I’d leave in a heartbeat.Holy shit. Send her here! 😱 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/12/20 02:18 AM |
| 32 | Let’s discuss why a HVM will choose to be with a HVW over the 100 million available pickmeishasLike seeks like. And once you realize that it isn’t a bad thing to be “high maintenance,” you’ll eventually cross paths with a HVM who sees your effort, matches it, and continues to build with you. I’d say the hardest part of this whole scenario is remembering your worth. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/12/20 02:09 AM |
| 42 | Gently reminder that there are no "valid" or "invalid" reasons to break up with someone.A brilliant quote from one of my favorite books is, “just wanting to leave is enough.” And that has stuck in my head since. Your intuition is there for a reason, and I’ve noticed how much better and brighter my life and relationships are if I actually tap into it and listen. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 04:08 PM |
| 8 | Gently reminder that there are no "valid" or "invalid" reasons to break up with someone.This is straight up in my top 10 favorite posts from this sub now. So many good reminders. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 04:06 PM |
| 24 | Another tale from the vault: Before FDS, I used to have to persuade men to wear a condom by telling them I was pro-life. To really sell it, I would look them directly in the eye, smile gleefully, and tell them that if they ever got me pregnant, I would keep the baby.True on ALL of the levels. And like you, I’m 100% childfree, and every single time I’ve mentioned this, the dude has tried to debate my stance... or worse, has tried to fuck with my BC, and when confronted about it, it was “all an accident.” Like you, I have zero qualms over getting an abortion should need be, but I hate the whole premise of not owning my own body. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 04:03 PM |
| 10 | Got the proposal just shy of our 1 year anniversary! Cheers to never settling 🥂Congrats, sis! He and you have amazing taste in jewelry. This is the ring of my dreams. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 03:32 AM |
| 30 | 😂😂Scrote Logic: No women are fucking me, therefore female sexuality doesn’t exist. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/12/20 04:32 PM |
| 14 | I finally left!Welcome to freedom, sis! Recently out myself. We know better now so we’ll do better. Cheers 🥂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 07:17 PM |
| 213 | The projection is palpable; I've spent quarantine fixing my skin, working out, and taking college courses. Ya'll?I’m with you there. 24 was just part of the warm up for me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 07:14 PM |
| 142 | The projection is palpable; I've spent quarantine fixing my skin, working out, and taking college courses. Ya'll?Imagine telling on yourself like that, for the whole world to see. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 07:13 PM |
| 11 | Even when in a happy relationship they want to ruin things. This is disgusting, can't help but feel sorry for her.Posts like this one make my eye twitch to think about ever marrying again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 05:14 AM |
| 13 | The funniest comments below such examples of "sex-positive libfems" are how they're wife material. Yeah, I want to see how any guy, before whom a woman objectifies herself like that, marries her and treats her accordingly. No: truth is she'll get classified as situationship material.Bangmaid is killing me. That’s exactly what it ends up being! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/20 06:48 PM |
| 16 | Guess which comment was written by a man...nobody takes 10 years to decide whether they want to marry someone. Absolutely nobody.I’m curious as to what the FDS Disciples say about this: what is the “right” amount of time before getting married? I’m sure it differs slightly from couple to couple, but there’s no way it could be years (plural) before knowing, right? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/20 06:38 PM |
| 4 | Queens, I need some major encouragement tonight. I broke up with my bf of 3 years today.“A relationship is a merger not a compromise.” 🤯 Saving this forever. Thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 04:59 PM |
| 3 | Queens, I need some major encouragement tonight. I broke up with my bf of 3 years today.How about your 10 favorite, in no particular order? I’d love to check them out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 03:39 PM |
| 63 | Queens, I need some major encouragement tonight. I broke up with my bf of 3 years today.Thank you so much. This is all so wonderful. I’m going to screenshot it and keep it as my background for constant reminders. 💜 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/12/20 03:59 AM |
| 8 | Breaking things = domestic abuse. It’s physical intimidation that counts as DV.I believe there are a few different terms that would fit, but Affective Emotional Transference is my first thought. AET works as a means to keep the victim(s) distracted by different objects, and feeling a kind of simultaneous fear/relief that it wasn’t them who was broken, crushed, or in any way hurt. AET still causes trauma, make no doubt about it, and anyone who destroys or uses force against objects is just as dangerous because it’s not a matter of if, but when, it will be you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 11:27 PM |
| 4 | Breaking things = domestic abuse. It’s physical intimidation that counts as DV.My ex once got in an argument with his folks over the phone, left the house for a minute to get some air. Right after he stepped outside, I heard this loud crunch-thud sound, so I went running outside after him. Once I got to him, I saw that he’d punched a dent into the garage door. I’d like to say I packed up and left immediately after that, but I didn’t and I should have. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 10:58 PM |
| 8 | Sunk Cost Fallacy in full effectCame here to say that the thought of it is scarier than the follow through and aftermath. Once you’ve fully let go, you begin this great undoing and restarting of everything you’ve wanted, everything you truly deserve. It was worth the temporary pain and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 04:58 AM |
| 2 | You broke me first. A song that really reminds my why women come here, we have all been pickme's bending over backwards for some LVM who treated us like garbage and then came running crying later. This song really reminds me of that journey, it is a bit sappy, but I really like it.Immediately added to my Spotify. Thank you! I love a good FDS-related song rec. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/12/20 04:53 AM |
| 65 | 44yo GROWN ASS adult CRIES over GFs sexual past. This is sending me 😂Another one for the Madonna/Whore Complex. Scrotes want us to be good in bed, but not too good. And heaven forbid if we’ve slept with anyone but the current guy. This is why your “number” is nobody’s business but your own. Btw, an awesome song that details this very phenomenon is “Body Count” by Jesse Reyez. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/12/20 04:51 PM |
| 50 | A small one, but a red flag nonethelessSomething I’ve never considered. This is brilliant advice! Thank you! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 07:22 PM |
| 24 | My good guy friend of many years confessed feelings for me, then I learned he is still chasing after his ex. When I asked why he would compromise our friendship if he still is obsessed with his ex and commented he has been acting unhappy lately...this was his response. Blocked/deleted.Redirect him to a Happy Lamp on Amazon to fix his cuffing season SADs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 06:45 PM |
| 18 | My good guy friend of many years confessed feelings for me, then I learned he is still chasing after his ex. When I asked why he would compromise our friendship if he still is obsessed with his ex and commented he has been acting unhappy lately...this was his response. Blocked/deleted.I’m CACKLING 😂😂😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 06:44 PM |
| 47 | My good guy friend of many years confessed feelings for me, then I learned he is still chasing after his ex. When I asked why he would compromise our friendship if he still is obsessed with his ex and commented he has been acting unhappy lately...this was his response. Blocked/deleted.That’s the part that breaks my heart. Romantic ‘ships come and go, but losing a long term friendship over his bullshit is heartbreaking. I’d much rather lose a bf than a good friend. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 06:43 PM |
| 14 | My good guy friend of many years confessed feelings for me, then I learned he is still chasing after his ex. When I asked why he would compromise our friendship if he still is obsessed with his ex and commented he has been acting unhappy lately...this was his response. Blocked/deleted.This almost works as Queen Shit too. None of us will be second options for dudes anymore. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 06:41 PM |
| 124 | She did the right thing and she's doubting herselfThis reeks of cheating. And she’s so right to be upset. Her boyfriend took her ex-best friend out on a date... several hours away from home. I guarantee they got out of town so they could fuck without worrying of being caught. Please, god, I hope this woman cuts them both off entirely. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 03:50 PM |
| 4 | Cheers to us all. 🥂You’ve got this, sis. You have all of us behind you and supporting you, and you know you deserve better. 💜 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 03:46 PM |
| 19 | Dump him if he has EDFuck that misogyny. He’s allowed to use a fleshlight behind your back, but criticizes you over having toys, too. 🤦🏼♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 03:21 PM |
| 1 | Cheers to us all. 🥂Karma is a beautiful thing to sit back and watch. I’m the same way, but the frequency is lessening with time. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 05:41 AM |
| 50 | How can you tell if a man’s relationship with his mom is healthy versus a man who has “mommy-itis”??One of my exes always ran to his mommy after we’d begin a discussion. He was the oldest of a few kids and never stopped being coddled by her. She had the audacity to, before we wed, say “you better not break my little boy’s heart,” as if relationships only work one way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/20 02:13 AM |
| 77 | You can look up the npr article. I read this and now want to pack up and move to another planet, bye 🤮Jesus Christ. “Let me put you in risk of a deadly virus so I can see if you’re worth a few extra bucks.” 😳 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 05:23 PM |
| 23 | Porn is ruining sex for women. So many men can't f*** properly 🤢. What's the point of being with a man that can't even please you in bed !?!This has been my go-to for dudes when they express to me their sexual needs and desires. The very first thing I say is, “can I do it to you first so you understand the feeling?” And when they turn white and their penis literally inverts back into their bodies.... I know I’ve done the right thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 04:36 PM |
| 34 | 🚁🚁🚁Back to hoovering 👀🚁🚁🚁A very timely post for me personally, thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 04:26 PM |
| 29 | They know. Don't waste your time.Inspiring to read. I know the majority (if not all of us) here want this to be our end case. There’s just so much unlearning that has to happen first to pry us from our old pickmeshia ways, but this sub has been imperative to make us aware of those ways but also to console each other. I’m truly so happy for you, OP. I wish that kind of mature, authentic love for all of us here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 03:59 PM |
| 2 | Saw this on twitter - Hinge date puts woman's pictures through an analyzer online to "check if she is actually attractive," tells her her "forehead is too big," then tries to secure a hang out next weekSCienTifICallY aTTracTIvE 🙄 What the actual fuck, man? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/12/20 01:35 AM |
| 1 | My boyfriend is anti-feminist but is sooooo sweet and wonderful otherwise...There’s so much cognitive distortion to unpack here. Her bf can’t really be sweet and wonderful if he hates women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/20 03:37 PM |
| 77 | Thoughts?There’s absolutely nothing romantic or individualized about the way this guy proposed. I looked up the marriage proposal fail video where this clip came from, and it’s cringe all the way through. The way he corrals random people at the mall to stand by and watch (boost his ego), the fact he’s the only one dressed up, all of this shows me he’s more about appearances than wanting to marry this girl. And NO, you shouldn’t accept the ring only to return it later to save face. Y’all aren’t getting ma… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/20 03:00 PM |
| 40 | Thoughts?Same here. I think the thing that gets me the most is that if he doesn’t respect something so innately part of yourself and instead chooses to pull off some kind of big love gesture... it’s such a high level of disrespect. So, no, I don’t pity or sympathize with this dude’s disappointment. It was deserved. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/20 02:47 PM |
| 229 | Thoughts?If a guy did this to me (propose so publicly), I would have to say no because he clearly doesn’t know one of my fundamental personality traits- introversion. This feels like she’s been painted into a corner. Good for her for still sticking by her decision, even with the pressure of a crowd. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/12/20 12:38 PM |
| 5 | Looking back in retrospectHoly. Shit. I’m so sorry. (Also, that would’ve made an incredible fire for roasting s’mores.) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/12/20 10:59 PM |
| 8 | Looking back in retrospectIf I ever find myself in that situation again, (god forbid) I’m absolutely going to do that. You’ve gotta love that misogyny where women have to look and act exactly one certain way, but if us ladies share our preferences... we’re somehow shallow. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/12/20 10:10 PM |
| 2 | Or both?THIS. Exactly this. Men are this thing I have to tolerate while women are these ethereal beings that I’m too shy to even look too long at. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/20 03:40 AM |
| 3 | This, seriously.My ex used to be called “pussy whipped” by his brother anytime my ex went along with any of my choices. As if compromise was a bad thing in a relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/12/20 03:24 AM |
| 10 | I hope her divorce lawyer has a wonderful time with the public photographic evidence of his cheating.The fact that he backpedals so fast with “but things are good now” and bringing up that she was quitting smoking (totally unrelated to the story, but to make the reader find some compassion with this dude). Just. No. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/20 10:09 PM |
| 58 | I hope her divorce lawyer has a wonderful time with the public photographic evidence of his cheating.Please, karma (and the family justice system). Be swift and extremely firm. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/20 10:06 PM |
| 6 | Beware LV people who think a relationships are supposed to be transactional.“Kindness is not meant to be tracked.” GOD YES 🙌🏼 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/20 09:51 PM |
| 5 | I believe there is some truth to it for sure. Any thoughts ?I feel like this has been true in my experience. I give far too many chances, but once I’m gone, I’m gone forever. I’ve had plenty of exes come out of the woodwork, even after years, to “check in.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/20 08:35 PM |
| 1 | Thought of this sub. Sorry if it’s a repost.Came here to say this. Also, there is a fantastic online version of Cards Against Humanity (pretend you’re xyzzy) that I’ve been using with friends + Discord. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/20 05:36 PM |
| 12 | For every woman who thinks she "doesn't deserve" a high value man.I needed so badly to hear this, especially today. I feel so helpless at times for not being able to do everything I feel I should be doing but cannot because of so many health issues. I just feel so guilty and look back at old pictures of when I was healthier and put together. I wish I was still that girl. But I’m learning to find patience. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/01/20 04:29 AM |
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