Need advise, wife won’t divorce me but we already separated.

Throwaway4120213 · 2021-09-16T01:12:11+00:00

Dude - have some self respect - she’s seeing other guys and you’re still worried about what she wants? She wants to maintain her image, wants the societal benefit of marriage, maybe waiting until you advance in your career and she can get $$$, who knows - but why are you catering to what she wants?

Threatening to kill herself if you divorce is emotional manipulation - again, have some self respect. Don’t be bullied or weak - file for divorce yourself. If you really believe she will kill herself - tell her parents or law enforcement. Somehow I doubt your wife is going from banging other dudes to killing herself if you file for divorce. You’re getting played.

henrysmyagent · 2021-09-16T04:02:01+00:00

If she kills herself, then you do not have to divorce her.

Why would you allow her to manipulate you with such a stupid and self-defeating ultimatum?

You are an intelligent and caring adult. Tell her the marriage is dead and you are cutting her out of your life like you would a cancerous tumor on your ass, and for the same reason - she is killing you.

If she is stupid enough to repeqt her threat of self harm, then as an intelligent and caring adult you MUST call 911 and get her help for her repeated threats to harm herself.

Doesnt matter if you don't believe her. Unless you are a clinically trained psychologist or psychiatrist, that ain't your judgement to make.

Stop being her doormat! She makes thses empty threats because you allow them to work.

Regain your power and dignity. Do it today. Start the divorce NOW.

sicrm · 2021-09-16T01:10:42+00:00

she’s trying to scare you into staying.

tell her family about the suicide threat if you want but even that could make things more hostile.

either way, go ahead with the divorce and ask your lawyer what steps you can take to protect yourself.

pegleg_legal · 2021-09-16T06:54:45+00:00

She told me she will kill her self if I divorce her.

I highly doubt she would miss out on the chance to make you miserable, whether or not married, for years to come. Women don't operate like that. You're being manipulated.

dday_throwaway3 · 2021-09-16T12:50:04+00:00

Borderline Personality Disorder. Ignore what she says or wants and move forward with divorce. She is an adult and can take care of herself. Be grateful you saw her true colors before you fathered a child with her.

dogsrule2019 · 2021-09-16T02:21:50+00:00

I don't mean to be crude, but fuck that bullshit. Go get your freedom back, dude. We are here to support you.

playerknowmore · 2021-09-16T02:39:49+00:00

My advice is to go find a lawyer. If she is worried about the quality of her lifestyle; tell her to date up. She can't live forever off your value; it's time she learned what her value is.

Get out before one of her losers knocks her up! GET OUTNOW!

Girl_Dad42 · 2021-09-16T02:02:13+00:00

She wants her cake and to eat it too! Move forward with the divorce. The current situation isn’t fair to you!!

Hot-Huckleberry5736 · 2021-09-16T04:26:56+00:00

Bro divorce her ass and get what little dignity you have left back in order

Gxl4 · 2021-09-16T04:49:47+00:00

Grow some self respect, she’s sleeping around and you’re saying to take all the dept and she the assets?

No bueno homes.

Also this ‘iLl kIlL mYsELf’ is a stupid manipulative way to keep you tied up. I would have walked out of there yesterday.

What i would do: - go talk to a lawyer - document all the shit - file for it myself when i have everything in place - dont give her a damn thing.

akihonj · 2021-09-16T12:28:43+00:00

Why are you putting yourself at her mercy when she has shown that she has none, why are you willing to be her bank account while you watch your life ebb away.

Leave and get into another place, file for divorce.

Sorry to say this but if she carries out her threats, she most probably won't by the way, if she does then that's in her not you, you are not responsible for the choices she makes.

Time to think of yourself and your future.

Jbr74 · 2021-09-16T22:39:18+00:00

And the downside is......

zackknowsnothing · 2021-09-27T04:32:02+00:00

Two questions brothers, lease is up, under both of our names, we didn’t renew it, I moved out but she refuses to move out, monthly payment without contract is much higher. She said as long as she doesn’t move out I have the Obligation to pay for the rent, because it is also under my name, and I don’t want to ruin my credit, what should I do ?

Title	Need advise, wife won’t divorce me but we already separated.
Author	zackknowsnothing
Upvotes	2
Comments	15
Date	September 16, 2021 12:48 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/pp2wk4/need_advise_wife_wont_divorce_me_but_we_already/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/need-advise-wife-wont-divorce-me-but-we-already.1070196 https://theredarchive.com/post/1070196

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