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Do feminists want to suppress men?

PorkyTheChop

October 8, 2021
5 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://medium.com/counterarts/how-does-feminism-intersect-with-mens-rights-13ca81fa9a4e
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Title Do feminists want to suppress men?
Author

PorkyTheChop

Upvotes 5
Comments 110
Date October 8, 2021 6:46 PM UTC
(4 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/q442xe/do_feminists_want_to_suppress_men/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/do-feminists-want-to-suppress-men.1076688
https://theredarchive.com/post/1076688
Red Pill terms in post
feminismfeminist
Top posts by PorkyTheChop

I Ran an Experiment on Reddit

0 upvotes
October 9, 2021
/r/MensRights

Comments

[–]Inbefore121 40 points41 points42 points 4 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

Same old lip service they've been giving for years. Decades. And yet they do nothing meaningful to actually improve men's situation and instead invest that time and resources into suppressing the discussion surrounding men's issues. It's about maintaining the dominant place in the narrative.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -28 points-27 points-26 points 4 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

I don't think that's true exactly. Feminism has personally made my life better, and safer as well. I can get married, I can go out in public, I can express myself how I want. Rates of circumcision in the US have been on the decline (which I acknowledge cannot just be attributed to feminists). They work to increase access to birth control which benefits men. Education, healthcare, consent, body positivity. Have you not heard of the "dad bod" and how popular it is these days? There's so much more that I haven't even began to discuss here.

[–]Inbefore121 33 points34 points35 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm glad to hear that feminism has improved your life. At least the positive effect is there. Because feminism and feminists have had a demonstrably negative effect on mine. For example when my mother was leaving her toxic boyfriend when I was about 13. She left him suddenly and he was crazy, so she decided to go to a women's shelter. They did not want me there. They told my mom several times that she could stay, but she's have to find other arrangements for me as I was a "young man". This was despite the fact that my mom had nowhere for me or herself to go, so those other arrangements for me would have been the street. She made them aware of this, they wouldn't budge. Only until my mom involved a lawyer did they decide maybe 13 isn't too old. Feminism's insistence on portraying men as dangerous and oppressors almost destroyed my life before it even began.

And it destroys many others who aren't so lucky. Look at feminism's characterizations of domestic violence as a women's issue. The result? Nearly all resources, rhetoric devoted entirely to women. Despite the fact that rates of victimization are nearly equal between the genders and women are MORE often violent than men.

Look at their characterization of rape and sexual violence. Rape culture, teach men not to rape, Schrodinger's rapist. The result? ALL but the tiniest amount of resources and rhetoric are completely devoted to female victims. To the point where male victims are not just erased but chided ridiculed, in media and otherwise tormented and humiliated. Especially when their rapist is a woman. And this is despite the fact that rape victimization and perpetration is just about equal between the genders.

I'll stop here cuz it's gotten long and I'm on my phone but finding this information is what disillusioned me from the feminist movement. And then in college when I took a gender studies class in order to talk to real feminists about this and was ostracized (at least in the class) turned me anti feminist. And that's the worst part of all of this. If you try to bring light to these issues from within feminism? They will fucking bury you, they'll smear and destroy you. I know it sounds hyperbolic, but look at the story of Erin Pizzey or more recently look up the story of Cassie Jaye (Two people who made tangible contributions to the feminist movement, and were subsequently run out and had their lives damaged when they began to advocate for men)

The biggest shame is that the men's and women's movement could be so effective if they worked together. They could effect so much change for the better but how can you work with someone who believes you're an oppressor just because you exist as you are?

Edit: for those of you who haven't, I implore you to watch Cassie Jaye's documentary: The Red Pill. She does a real dive into the men's rights movement and talks to a lot of the major players. She ultimately sacrificed her career to make that movie happen and she did a damn good job. The respect I have for her is fucking immense.

[–]maxlvb 23 points24 points25 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You: "Feminism is for men too!"

  • All of r/mensrights.Okay, well as men here's what we struggle with.

You: "Not everything needs to be about men, alright? Besides, solving women's issues will solve men's issues."

  • All of r/mensrights. Okay, but what about all these men's issues that aren't linked to women's issues?

You: "Then make your own group and stop whining! God, men can be so fragile."

  • All of r/mensrights. Okay, here's this group we made. We're gonna assemble and talk about men's issues.

You: "Misogynists! You just want to hate on women! If you really cared about equality you'd be feminists!"


The horror of feminism is that it created a whole class called “The Victim Class”. It is not real. It can’t be cured, as long as it defines women as the perpetual victim of men.

[–]DavidByron2 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

What evidence is there that feminists wanted let alone worked towards any of that?

They work to increase access to birth control

Exactly the opposite is true. Obamacare mandates coverage of birth control for women but not men. Oh wait you probably didn't even think that men need birth control too, did you? You meant that men "benefit" from female supremacy.

Education

Feminists have worked for decades for anti-male discrimination in education and continue to. Same for healthcare. As for consent feminists say men can't be raped by women and all heterosexual sex is rape by the man of the woman.

Have you not heard of the "dad bod"

When the hell has feminism EVER advocated for men that way?

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -16 points-15 points-14 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I did consider that men need birth control. I acknowledged that in my article. Please read it instead of just skimming the bold terms. There is no common hormonal form of male birth control, only condoms and vasectomies. Many feminists at places like Planned Parenthood and events on sexuality give free condoms to those who need them. As well, many feminists work for more affordable healthcare which benefits those who need vasectomies.

They do not do that for education. As someone who is currently in school, I can guarantee you that many fields of education such as stem are still EXTREMELY male-heavy. I had 0 women in my computer science course.

I'm sorry that you haven't seen any women advocate for male body positivity. I've seen plenty of them hype up heavier men and even articles in the media about helping men become more confident, not only in their body but also their mental health.

[–]DavidByron2 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If they don’t want to have children at that point in their lives, birth control or abstinence is essential.

Because unlike women, men don't deserve any reproductive or family rights? Men should be forced into becoming parents against their will by the state, right? Unlike women who deserve to have rights.

There is no common hormonal form of male birth control, only condoms and vasectomies.

Obamacare covers both those for women but neither for men.

They do not do that for education

How would you know? You're still in high school. What do you know about the history of any of this?

I'm sorry that you haven't seen any women advocate for male body positivity

I said FEMINISTS not WOMEN. There's a difference don't you think?

[–]Bara-enthusiast 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

They definitely do that for education my guy. Studies show that women get graded higher for the same work at all level of academia. There are no programs for men in female dominated classes like women in stem etc.

Computer science is one of the few fields still dominated by men. The medical field was stolen from us

[–]tenchineuro 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminism has personally made my life better, and safer as well.

Then you must necessarily be a woman. Congratulations.

[–]Ok-Efficiency1842 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

How the fuck does "consent" help men? By putting more of them in jail and getting them fired from their jobs?

Feminist have destroyed countless men's lives over false allegations. They're hateful monsters. Go tell Marylin Manson or fucking Kavanaugh that feminism has helped them.

You're a moron and a lying sack of shit if you believe feminism hasn't ruined men.

[–]Inbefore121 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

Dude chill out. We have a feminist or feminist leaning person here Willing to have an honest and respectful exchange of ideas. How often does that happen. This person is a guest (I'm assuming) there's no reason to be hostile and rude just because they disagree with you. C'mon man.

[–]maxlvb 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

Willing to have an honest and respectful exchange of ideas.

There is nothing at all honest or respectful about this 'exchange' from the OP.

It's just another so called indoctrinated feminist spouting the 'feminist narrative'...


Feminism is never coming to help men. We no longer need to play nice. What are they gonna do? Not help us even MORE? So to paraphrase Feminists; no dick, no opinion. Fuck off, Big Sister. Men need Feminism like bicycles need fish.

[+]Inbefore121 -8 points-7 points-6 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

If we adopt all the things about the movement that we despise, then we become no better. All the reasons not to be feminist would apply to MRAs and what's worse is we become all the things feminists believe and say about us. The point of the MRM is to be better, so let's be better and not engage in the behavior that set us against feminism. And if you think that's a lot harder, you'd be right. But that's how you become better, by taking the more difficult route.

[–]maxlvb 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

If we adopt all the things about the movement that we despise, then we become no better.

Who is doing this 'adopting'?

That's not happening and is just another example of Feminists, women, and their white knight defenders (like yourself) need to stop holding men to standards they're personally and collectively unwilling to meet.

All the reasons not to be feminist would apply to MRAs and what's worse is we become all the things feminists believe and say about us.

Why do you even care what feminists say about us? I dont, they can say what they want but in the end that which is asserted without evidence can be dismissed without evidence.

The point of the MRM is to be better, so let's be better and not engage in the behavior that set us against feminism.

And here we have it, the classic 'white knight' argument, that we cant say anything that might 'frighten the feminists'. Maybe you should go back to r/menslib, that's more suited to you feminist apologist beliefs about men's rights.

And if you think that's a lot harder, you'd be right. But that's how you become better, by taking the more difficult route.

I dont think it's harder, far from it. Trust me, it's really easy to do. It's the simps, white knight dont frighten the feminists version of feminism and it has no place here in r/mensrights, or IRL for any man.

If you get offended by MRA's here in this sub talking about all that is wrong with feminism, then you are part of the problem that makes such talk necessary....


Women and feminists often complain men are not stepping in on their behalf, under the mistaken presumption women are entitled to men's protection.

[–]Inbefore121 -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

Dude you're so hostile. For what? Calm down, damn. Check my fuckin comment history, I am NO feminist apologist. Or white knight. The reason I criticized you as I did is because you're using shitty and aggressive debate tactics! That's no way to change a mind, or win a debate in the grander scheme. And I genuinely thought this person had a chance to have their mind changed. For example, how many feminists would actually even acknowledge that misandry is a thing, let alone use the term to describe hateful feminists. That meant that the men's issues have at least some legitimacy in that person's eyes. That's all that's needed to take that first step OUT of feminism. But how the hell are gonna change someone's mind if you go straight to being a dick. They're just gonna shut down. Which is exactly what happened. Look OP is nowhere to be found. To summarize, I criticized you because your approach to debate was trash. In a one on one context, you would have just turned the person away from all these ideas and made them shut down, so mission failed. And in a more formal or public debate setting you would have turned the audience and those listening against these ideas, so mission fucking failed! I've actually debated feminist IRL and not only successfully changed minds but as a result of at times the feminist getting angry and resorting to angry outbursts and insults, (a sign you've lost the debate) had bystanders come up to me and say they were blown away by my talking points and will look further into the movement! I've both deconverted feminists and brought in NEW MRAs IRL, by not resorting to what you did earlier. Isn't that the whole damn point to all this!? That's why I criticized you.

[–]maxlvb 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Learn how to format text FFS! Posting a wall of text just results in a TLDR...

What I did manage to discern from it was that it's just more BS white knighting for feminism, and that MRA's must not do anything that frightens the feminists...

So once again this needs to be said...

Feminism is never coming to help men. We no longer need to play nice. What are they gonna do? Not help us even MORE? So to paraphrase Feminists; no dick, no opinion. Fuck off, Big Sister. Men need Feminism like bicycles need fish.

And finally, In one post you managed to convey staggering arrogance, self-delusion, insufferable smugness and, ultimately, defeatism. It's a recipe for irrelevance that too many like you seem eager to replicate at every opportunity.


“Womanism is feminism's vulgate. It asserts that women are the oppressed or the victims and never the collaborators in the 'bad' things that men do. It entails a double standard around sexuality where women's sexual self-expression is seen as necessary and even desirable, but men's is seen as dangerous or even disgusting. Womanism is by no means confined to a tiny, politically motivated bunch of man-hating feminists, but is a regular feature of mainstream culture.”

[–]Inbefore121 -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Well clearly you're too lazy to read my reply. Because it was pretty much the opposite of that. At this point o really don't give a shit about what you think or do. Peace fuckface.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -8 points-7 points-6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Please read my article before posting. I acknowledged every point that you just made.

[–]Explise209 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminism is the reason my pedophile will never get conviction for his actions. But yea I’m glad you like feminism.

[–]Broadside_Beers 23 points24 points25 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Just gonna post the obligatory response from Karen Straughan to people who think “they’re the real feminist”. Feminist gaslighting is low effort and really tiresome.

So what you're saying is that you, a commenter using a username on an internet forum are the true feminist, and the feminists actually responsible for changing the laws, writing the academic theory, teaching the courses, influencing the public policies, and the massive, well-funded feminist organizations with thousands and thousands of members all of whom call themselves feminists... they are not "real feminists".

That's not just "no true Scotsman". That's delusional self deception.

Listen, if you want to call yourself a feminist, I don't care. I've been investigating feminism for more than 9 years now, and people like you used to piss me off, because to my mind all you were doing was providing cover and ballast for the powerful political and academic feminists you claim are just jerks. And believe me, they ARE jerks. If you knew half of what I know about the things they've done under the banner of feminism, maybe you'd stop calling yourself one.

But I want you to know. You don't matter. You're not the director of the Feminist Majority Foundation and editor of Ms. Magazine, Katherine Spillar, who said of domestic violence: "Well, that's just a clean-up word for wife-beating," and went on to add that regarding male victims of dating violence, "we know it's not girls beating up boys, it's boys beating up girls."

You're not Jan Reimer, former mayor of Edmonton and long-time head of Alberta's Network of Women's Shelters, who just a few years ago refused to appear on a TV program discussing male victims of domestic violence, because for her to even show up and discuss it would lend legitimacy to the idea that they exist.

You're not Mary P Koss, who describes male victims of female rapists in her academic papers as being not rape victims because they were "ambivalent about their sexual desires" (if you don't know what that means, it's that they actually wanted it), and then went on to define them out of the definition of rape in the CDC's research because it's inappropriate to consider what happened to them rape.

You're not the National Organization for Women, and its associated legal foundations, who lobbied to replace the gender neutral federal Family Violence Prevention and Services Act of 1984 with the obscenely gendered Violence Against Women Act of 1994. The passing of that law cut male victims out of support services and legal assistance in more than 60 passages, just because they were male.

You're not the Florida chapter of the NOW, who successfully lobbied to have Governor Rick Scott veto not one, but two alimony reform bills in the last ten years, bills that had passed both houses with overwhelming bipartisan support, and were supported by more than 70% of the electorate.

You're not the feminist group in Maryland who convinced every female member of the House on both sides of the aisle to walk off the floor when a shared parenting bill came up for a vote, meaning the quorum could not be met and the bill died then and there.

You're not the feminists in Canada agitating to remove sexual assault from the normal criminal courts, into quasi-criminal courts of equity where the burden of proof would be lowered, the defendant could be compelled to testify, discovery would go both ways, and defendants would not be entitled to a public defender.

You're not Professor Elizabeth Sheehy, who wrote a book advocating that women not only have the right to murder their husbands without fear of prosecution if they make a claim of abuse, but that they have the moral responsibility to murder their husbands.

You're not the feminist legal scholars and advocates who successfully changed rape laws such that a woman's history of making multiple false allegations of rape can be excluded from evidence at trial because it's "part of her sexual history."

You're not the feminists who splattered the media with the false claim that putting your penis in a passed-out woman's mouth is "not a crime" in Oklahoma, because the prosecutor was incompetent and charged the defendant under an inappropriate statute (forcible sodomy) and the higher court refused to expand the definition of that statute beyond its intended scope when there was already a perfectly good one (sexual battery) already there. You're not the idiot feminists lying to the public and potentially putting women in Oklahoma at risk by telling potential offenders there's a "legal" way to rape them.

And you're none of the hundreds or thousands of feminist scholars, writers, thinkers, researchers, teachers and philosophers who constructed and propagate the body of bunkum theories upon which all of these atrocities are based.

You're the true feminist. Some random person on the internet.

[–]gratis_eekhoorn 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

So far havent seen any feminist to respond after this comment is dropped lol.

[–]tenchineuro 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Does any feminist care about men or fair and equal treatment?

Not as far as I've ever seen.

[–]red_philosopher 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If Jesus is real, he just came from on high and laid the smackdown.

[–]DavidByron2 21 points22 points23 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

Show me a feminist who says they don't hate men.

I'll show you a feminist who hates men.


This guy is trying to write an article about how feminism helps men an he can't think of a single thing. One of the things he claims "helps men" is the "wage gap" hate speech. That's like saying "Jews run Hollywood" is way to help fight racism. The article is a string of lies so obvious that nobody could say it with sincerity so what's the real game here?

Defending the hate movement.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -9 points-8 points-7 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

You clearly haven't read the article :) "he can't think of a single thing" yes... I can. and I named several. take another look, please.

[–]DavidByron2 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Quit being such an arrogant ass. What are you some teenager? I've been discussing this stuff longer than you've been on the planet. Maybe you should consider the possibility that people here know a thing or two, huh?

Yes I read the article. I've written comments longer than that. Why would it be a surprise?

Naming some bullshit doesn't count as giving examples of how feminism helps men. it doesn't count if it's just lies, you know?

You come in here lying and ravings and defending a hate movement and then gaslighting everyone and telling them about their life. Oh gosh no you weren't abused because I'm a teenager and know your life better than you do yourself. So smart. If you don't learn some humility you won't last here long.

If you really think any of those idiotic things you said were really true (they weren't) then I suggest you pick ONE topic -- the one you feel most confident about -- and ask about it here. ASK DON'T TELL.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I'm sorry if I came across as "arrogant" or "lying and raving" about anything. I sent a link to an article and sent several comments here requesting others provide their perspectives. I'm here coming across the aisle, remember, not you. I'm here to learn about your point of view.

I never insinuated that anyone's experiences aren't valid. They are. And I never said that we shouldn't take men's views seriously. The point of the article was about how feminism helps men as well as women. You are very welcome to disagree, that is why we are both here. But I *never* said that men aren't to be heard. I am a man, remember.

[–]DavidByron2 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The point of the article was about how feminism helps men

And that negates people's lived experience of feminism as a hate movement.

It's fine for you to talk and it's fine for you to try and persuade people that a hate movement is really all about equality but if you cam in here claiming Nazis were all for racial equality you'd expect some shit thrown your way, right? So you need to calibrate your expectations towards reality here. You're not just going to fly in here telling us all feminism is wonderful and expect us to nod our heads. That's a feminist board you need for that stuff.

[–]Punder_man 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem is though.. your article didn't REALLY explain how feminism helps men..
It listed how it's benefited women and how YOU think those benefit men tangentially..

If you want a balanced view.. maybe look at the ways in which feminism has directly harmed men as well?
Here's a hint for you.. go look up the Duluth domestic violence model to start with...

[–]maxlvb 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The point of the article was about how feminism helps men

Feminists like to claim that their movement is about "equality" and often use the dictionary definition as proof.

But what the dictionary says and what feminism and feminists do are two completely different things.

Actions speak louder than words, therefore feminism and feminists should be judged by what it and they do instead of what the dictionary definition says.

And through its actions the feminist movement has constantly shows that it isn't about equality, but is actually about female privilege and misandry - a skewed system in women's favour, seeking superior rights & privileges for women, demonising men & boys. It is very obvious that "equality" is nothing more than a mask that the feminist movement uses to conceal its female privilege and anti-male agendas.


“Womanism is feminism's vulgate. It asserts that women are the oppressed or the victims and never the collaborators in the 'bad' things that men do. It entails a double standard around sexuality where women's sexual self-expression is seen as necessary and even desirable, but men's is seen as dangerous or even disgusting. Womanism is by no means confined to a tiny, politically motivated bunch of man-hating feminists, but is a regular feature of mainstream culture.”


“One of the reasons for the failure of feminism to dislodge deeply held perceptions of male and female behaviour was its insistence that women were victims, and men powerful patriarchs, which made a travesty of ordinary people's experience of the mutual interdependence of men and women.”

Rosalind Coward


Feminism is never coming to help men. We no longer need to play nice. What are they gonna do? Not help us even MORE? So to paraphrase Feminists; no dick, no opinion. Fuck off, Big Sister. Men need Feminism like bicycles need fish.

[–]red_philosopher 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem is, you never clearly demonstrated how feminism is helping men.

You parroted hateful speech and lies.

Perform some critical thinking. Look under the surface of the "pop phrases." Peer into the deep and really ask the hard questions.

There's a massive comment above that has numerous instances of feminists actively working against equality.

Why?

And logical fallacies are not acceptable.

[–]Broadside_Beers 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

You're either gaslighting deliberately, or you haven't turned a critical eye on your own belief system.

To claim there is a wage gap (there isn't, and it has been thoroughly debunked) and keep pushing that falsehood in spite of contrary evidence is demonstrable of arguing in bad faith and pushing an agenda - the feminist agenda.

To claim there is a patriarchy (another very feminist construct), implies universal victimhood of women and universal male tyranny and the presumption of psycopathy on the part of men as a class, which is inherently hateful.

To claim family court is fair, or "getting fairer", is already an outright lie, but then to double down on the lie with the claim that feminism is fighting to make it fairer? Are you trolling us, or do you live under a rock?

To claim that feminists are helping men by "teaching consent"? Feminists are pushing "rape culture" and still pushing patriarchal domestic terrorism, AKA the Duluth Model. Their narrative holds that men are inherently rapists, and women inherently predated upon. To believe in that, you do have to have implicit beliefs that men are violent, sex-crazed, sociopathic monsters with some kind of rape switch, or that men need to be "trained" out of their natural rapey inclinations.

To claim feminism is responsible for a trend of women looking upon "dad bods" favourably is hilarious, when anthropologists have researched the hormonal and behavioural changes in men who go from fit to dad bod, and the differences between them, and how dad bod men are more likely to exhibit a greater paternal instinct, and be more caring and nurturing in the home environment. Frankly put, it's the height of insipid arrogance for anyone, feminists included, to claim they are responsible for "making" women attracted to dad bods.

Feminism has actively worked to increase female enrolment and graduation at all levels of education, starting with school reform in the 80's (specifically to cater to women), and even with women being more likely to attend and finish school, more women entering secondary education, and more women getting degrees, feminism still pushes for every more female favouritism. Then there is affirmative action policies, discriminating against men to giving hiring priority to women, regardless of whether the man she is displacing is a better fit or more qualified. This is directly working against men, and for you to say it isn't... Baffling. How is your cognitive dissonance going?

Toxic Masculinity isn't a thing. It's a hateful term, it's not considered helpful in any clinical sense. (Look into the cognitive distortion known as labelling.) It means whatever the feminist wants it to mean in the context of their discussion at the time, and is most often used as an ideological bludgeon. The only way I might be convinced that feminism isn't using the term "toxic masculinity" as an underhanded or passive-aggressive way to bash men, maleness, or masculinity is if they spoke about "toxic femininity" as well, as vehemently, and as frequently (I also hate that term, for the record.) But they don't.

[–]WingsofSky 15 points16 points17 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

Seems like some women these days want to "Destroy and kill all men".

[–]Broadside_Beers 15 points16 points17 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Sally Miller Gearhart and Mary Daly, both academic icons from the second wave, advocated for a drastic reduction in the male population (to the tune of men being reduced to making up 1-10%), so male genocide is not a new idea for feminists.

[–]WingsofSky 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Wouldn't surprise if a big group get together and try later. For that all glorious power and responsibility they think they want.. lol

[–]Broadside_Beers 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

One might argue that they are working towards it, with all the work going into and popularising bone marrow babies.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -7 points-6 points-5 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I acknowledged that in my article as well. As someone who spends a lot of time with other feminists and thinking about feminist ideals, that is an extreme minority and not something that any real feminist believes in.

[–]DavidByron2 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

When you refuse to acknowledge what everyone knows do you think it makes you look good? It makes you look like an asshole.

[–]maxlvb 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Please tell us all on what authority do you have to say who is or who isn't a real feminist. Inquiring minds would really like to know...


Feminism: Equality, when convenient.

[–]WingsofSky 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

The hate from women is real.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah. I don't doubt it, I've seen it myself first-hand.

[–]Dark-Hatter 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

I’m sorry. But I call bullsh*t…

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Okay. You say what you want. Can you give me your reasoning behind it? I like to have discussions with people who agree as well as disagree with what I believe to give myself a chance to see more perspectives on an issue.

[–]DavidByron2 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Well then I suggest you scrap this article and begin with a more humble attitude instead of coming in here demanding to the victims of feminism that you know their lives better than they do, huh?

Stop lying about everything and at the very least start off by apologizing that you continue to associate with hate.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -7 points-6 points-5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

You're the one here who has pre-conceived notions about my life, and that I associate with hate. I acknowledged in my article that I am not speaking for everyone's experiences here.

Also, I'm the one who came across the aisle to hear new perspectives. Please don't assume that I'm "demanding to the victims of feminism" anything. I'm here to learn.

[–]DavidByron2 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

that I associate with hate

You told us that in the article when you said you're a feminist and/or defend feminism. Feminism is a hate movement.

Even you admitted that while talking about "So-Called “Feminists” who Hate Men". You may want to ignore those people but since they're the leaders of the movement and constantly passing laws to screw men over and passing around hateful stereotypes that you unthinkingly repeat for them (like the "wage gap" hate speech) and you use the same name as them ("feminist") how else should anyone see you ?

[–]Dark-Hatter 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well for starters, that bit about contraception being for men is just… beyond nonsensical. I mean, if I want a woman to use contraception, it’s entirely beyond my control. If she doesn’t want to, I can’t force her. That bit spits in the face of all the men who have been trapped by women lying they had taken contraception.

The divorce court part is just 🧢

The part about men not showing emotion is just wrong. I had a discussion with my friend a while back about this and I remember coming to the epiphany that men DO show emotion. But not everyone. The only people capable of seeing that side of a man are those who can trust with his life. And,sorry for them, but women never enter that inner circle of a man’s life because it’s a well established fact that women are experts in emotional warfare. So giving someone, who knows how to cripple you with that knowledge, such access to your core is not a smart move. Best believe most men cry or have cried in front of their boys, the ones they call brothers despite having no relation with them. “Toxic masculinity “, to me is just a shaming tactic that these feminists brought up to just get more ammunition against innocent men.

I could go on but it’s too much work. Lol.

[–]Yoramus 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

There is no serious research behind the article. You are taking talking points from feminists and presenting them without checking if they correspond to what feminists in fact advocate for.

"Toxic masculinity affects women as well as men" - what's your definition of toxic masculinity? You are making it like feminism is working to shatter common expectations from men. Yet it is clear the opposite is happening. Everything in feminist rhetoric is about "educating men", and about the toxic masculinity thing, why are feminist trying to prevent female conscription? Isn't it a gender role they are quite happy to leave to men and to them alone?

"Body positivity has popularized the dad bod" - source?

"Feminism works to improve education for all" - that is laughable. I never heard "education for all" even as a talking point. It has always been about scholarships and programs for women in STEM in management etc.. Name me a female dominated field where feminism is acting to include men

"Men need birth control too" - of course. I am not sure it was feminists who spread birth control but even if it was them it was a force for good. Now everybody knows birth control and feminists actively oppose any law that could give men more control when birth control fails. A man cannot free himself from child support even when he has been raped or his semen has been stolen. A woman can abort or give her child for adoption at her will. What's equal here?

"Judges now give fairer consideration in divorces and child custody hearings" - hearsay, what's the source? And what's really happening is feminists push for having claims by women believed and acted upon, in the name of "protecting women". The oldest trick of the book is for women to falsely claim violence to remove custody from the father. And feminists push for special courts that will believe women even with no proof, oppose punishing women caught lying, and in Israel they even oppose making illegal for women to rape men. Do you know what's the feminist argument? That men could then falsely accuse women of rape. Ah, the irony...

"Feminists want to abolish the wage gap" here you are making me laugh. Whether or not people believe it "it exists". Please educate yourself about that. Spoiler alert: it doesn't exist when you account for the fact that women work less.

"They’ve taught consent for people of all genders" here you might have had a point except for the fact that still feminists oppose criminalizing women's rapes on men, rendering your point moot.

[–]tenchineuro 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

There is no serious research behind the article.

There's no source material for anything, no research at all was done. I think he copied the list from some feminist web page.

[–]Punder_man 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

3) Feminism works to improve education for all.You hear that feminists want to improve sex-education in schools, ormake stem courses more welcoming to girls, but these things help boys aswell. Preparing boys to practice safe and enjoyable sex is obviouslybeneficial to them, and opening stem to women provides men with moreperspectives, giving them a more rounded education.

Except for you know.. the fact that FEMINISTS pushed for Title IX and the fact that Education at all levels is geared towards optimal female learningOh and the fact that female teachers are more likely to mark down work submitted by boys / men or up mark work done by girls / women.Lets not also forget that the majority of scholarships out there are for WOMEN only.. and any time someone decides to try and setup a boys / men only scholarship they get called a bigot, sexist etc..

​

5) Judges now give fairer consideration in divorces and child custody hearings.It was common for men to get the short end of the stick in these cases,having to give large sums of alimony and child support when it wasn’talways necessary. Not only that, men are getting more considerationwhile obtaining full custody of their children, rather than judgesalways siding with the mother.

I call bullshit on this claim.. mainly because all it takes these days is for a woman to make an accusation of violence or sexual misconduct in divorce proceedings and the judges seem quite happy to bend over backwards to make sure the women and children are looked after.

Not only that but they seem happy to force men to pay child support without also giving them proper visitation rights. So yeah.. i'm gonna need to see evidence to back up this claim.

​

6) Feminists want to abolish the wage gap. Whetheror not you “believe” that it exists — it does — I will not go into thatin this article. By giving women fair wages compared to men who do thesame jobs, women will have higher morale, productivity, and overallhappiness in life. If I have to explain how this helps men, I worryabout the future of humanity.

Firstly, who are you to tell me "It exists" if I disagree with it? secondly no, they don't.. they simply want the same outcome e.g being paid what men get paid. Without also having to put in the same effort: Working longer hours, harder jobs, more physically demanding jobs, dangerous jobs etc..

There is no WAGE gap.. there is an EARNINGS gap which is completely different..The biggest problem about the wage gap is their analysis is flawed.. especially when they don't compare like for like..For example i've seen 'wage gap studies' where they compare the wage of female nurses vs male surgeons.. which is stupid because those are two completely different jobs with different skill sets / requirements.

Or they will look at the average earnings of men employed full time and compare it to the average earnings of women employed full time and will jump to the conclusion that there must be a wage gap!The problem is there are many variables in play some of them being:

  • The fact that men on average work longer hours than women
  • The fact that men on average work in more dangerous professions
  • The fact that more men on average are employed in full time jobs than women
  • etc

And they always claim "We have controlled for all factors" but they never seem to be able to explain their methodology on exactly HOW they controlled for any of the above factors..So if they don't explain how they managed to do that how can we check and make sure their conclusions are correct?

7) They’ve taught consent for people of all genders.Men don’t want sex all the time, and they don’t want it with anyoneeither. Feminists have increased the discussion surrounding consent andhow to obtain it for all parties present.

Really? because all i've seen about this is "Teach boys not to rape" or "If a man and a woman are both drunk and have sex the man has still raped her"Or even "If a woman wakes up and regrets having sex with someone then it does not matter if she consented at the time.. her regret means that it was rape"

Yeah.. once again all i'm seeing here is benefits towards women and nothing towards men...

And of course you end your article on:So-called "Feminists" who hate men

We don’t claim them. They aren’t reallyfeminists. They’re misandrists. They’re a loud, small population ofpeople that only call themselves feminists, while they actually goagainst the very definition of feminism — equality between all genders.Click the above link for more information about how Merriam-Websterdefines feminism.

Go look up the "No True Scottsman Fallacy" Now i'm not going to say that "ALL" feminists hate men.. but you can not seriously sit there and claim it to be "A small population of people who only call themselves feminists"Clementine Ford is a well noted FEMINIST who has demonstrated time and time again that she hates men and is very vocal about her views regarding men. Whom is in charge of regulating who can and can not identify as feminist these days?Also if it were true that the feminists who hate men are "A small minority" then surely it should be quite simple for the MAJORITY of "True" feminists to put them in their place right?

So why do we not see more and more "True" feminists calling out these false feminists for their misandry then?The answer is either:

  1. There are way less "True" feminists than you seem to think there are
  2. The "True" feminists don't want to risk the wrath of the false feminists by speaking up against them

Finally, Definitions change over time..
For example if you check google: "the advocacy of women's rights on the ground of equality of the sexes"

Note the bolded part of that definition.. ergo it means that feminism only cares about WOMEN'S rights and does not care at all about men.
Feminism is NOT a movement for equality because if it was then it would be called egalitarianism instead.. and would actually care about issues that affect men.. and would not treat men at the cause of every problem in society today.

TL;DR: Your article is bad and you should feel bad.. 3/10 not worth expending the effort I have put in already...

[–]63daddy 27 points28 points29 points 4 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

The article is pure B.S.

Here’s the bottom line: Feminism fights to advantage women. That inherently means disadvantaging men. Feminism isn’t for men, it’s against men.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -15 points-14 points-13 points 4 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link

I disagree. As someone who has directly benefited from feminism, I see the more subtle ways that feminists work to make life better for women as well as men. I delineated the specific ways in the article.

It isn't a competition. Just because you're making the lives of one group better doesn't mean you're making the others' worse.

[–]Broadside_Beers 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

It is a competition (more of a gender war, really, that feminism started over 150 years ago) when one side blames the other for all the ills and inequalities and oppression in the world. “Patriarchy”, “toxic masculinity”, “patriarchal domestic terrorism”, “rape culture”, “male privilege”.

[+]PorkyTheChop[S] -6 points-5 points-4 points 4 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link

I acknowledged all of that in my article. We do not blame "all men." We blame the system that favors men. No feminist wants to suppress men, take away their rights, or kill them. We want to change the system that suppresses women, takes away their rights, and does harm to them. (Abortion, FGM, rape, etc)

[–]Broadside_Beers 15 points16 points17 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Then you really don’t know anything about the history of feminism, the premise on which the ideology rests, or the lies and hateful rhetoric it pushes.

You are hopelessly naive.

Edit: why do you keep calling it your article, did you write it?

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

yes. I did write it. :)

I would also argue that the "hateful rhetoric" that you see is not pushed by feminists but rather by a minority of "radical feminists" -- ones that aren't actually feminists. TERFs. misandrists. haters. whatever you want to call them. they are loud but do not represent the views of 90% of modern feminists

[–]Broadside_Beers 17 points18 points19 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I see, I see.

Well, unfortunately, your opinion on the hateful "aspect" of feminism rests on the no true scotsman fallacy, AKA it's an appeal to purity.

Let's try Karen Straughans comment again, you might have missed the first time I posted it:

So what you're saying is that you, a commenter using a username on an internet forum are the true feminist, and the feminists actually responsible for changing the laws, writing the academic theory, teaching the courses, influencing the public policies, and the massive, well-funded feminist organizations with thousands and thousands of members all of whom call themselves feminists... they are not "real feminists".

That's not just "no true Scotsman". That's delusional self deception.

Listen, if you want to call yourself a feminist, I don't care. I've been investigating feminism for more than 9 years now, and people like you used to piss me off, because to my mind all you were doing was providing cover and ballast for the powerful political and academic feminists you claim are just jerks. And believe me, they ARE jerks. If you knew half of what I know about the things they've done under the banner of feminism, maybe you'd stop calling yourself one.

But I want you to know. You don't matter. You're not the director of the Feminist Majority Foundation and editor of Ms. Magazine, Katherine Spillar, who said of domestic violence: "Well, that's just a clean-up word for wife-beating," and went on to add that regarding male victims of dating violence, "we know it's not girls beating up boys, it's boys beating up girls."

You're not Jan Reimer, former mayor of Edmonton and long-time head of Alberta's Network of Women's Shelters, who just a few years ago refused to appear on a TV program discussing male victims of domestic violence, because for her to even show up and discuss it would lend legitimacy to the idea that they exist.

You're not Mary P Koss, who describes male victims of female rapists in her academic papers as being not rape victims because they were "ambivalent about their sexual desires" (if you don't know what that means, it's that they actually wanted it), and then went on to define them out of the definition of rape in the CDC's research because it's inappropriate to consider what happened to them rape.

You're not the National Organization for Women, and its associated legal foundations, who lobbied to replace the gender neutral federal Family Violence Prevention and Services Act of 1984 with the obscenely gendered Violence Against Women Act of 1994. The passing of that law cut male victims out of support services and legal assistance in more than 60 passages, just because they were male.

You're not the Florida chapter of the NOW, who successfully lobbied to have Governor Rick Scott veto not one, but two alimony reform bills in the last ten years, bills that had passed both houses with overwhelming bipartisan support, and were supported by more than 70% of the electorate.

You're not the feminist group in Maryland who convinced every female member of the House on both sides of the aisle to walk off the floor when a shared parenting bill came up for a vote, meaning the quorum could not be met and the bill died then and there.

You're not the feminists in Canada agitating to remove sexual assault from the normal criminal courts, into quasi-criminal courts of equity where the burden of proof would be lowered, the defendant could be compelled to testify, discovery would go both ways, and defendants would not be entitled to a public defender.

You're not Professor Elizabeth Sheehy, who wrote a book advocating that women not only have the right to murder their husbands without fear of prosecution if they make a claim of abuse, but that they have the moral responsibility to murder their husbands.

You're not the feminist legal scholars and advocates who successfully changed rape laws such that a woman's history of making multiple false allegations of rape can be excluded from evidence at trial because it's "part of her sexual history."

You're not the feminists who splattered the media with the false claim that putting your penis in a passed-out woman's mouth is "not a crime" in Oklahoma, because the prosecutor was incompetent and charged the defendant under an inappropriate statute (forcible sodomy) and the higher court refused to expand the definition of that statute beyond its intended scope when there was already a perfectly good one (sexual battery) already there. You're not the idiot feminists lying to the public and potentially putting women in Oklahoma at risk by telling potential offenders there's a "legal" way to rape them.

And you're none of the hundreds or thousands of feminist scholars, writers, thinkers, researchers, teachers and philosophers who constructed and propagate the body of bunkum theories upon which all of these atrocities are based.

You're the true feminist. Some random person on the internet.

[–]63daddy 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Mainstream feminist organizations have actively lobbied for and won anti-male policies. It’s not just radical feminists, it’s mainstream feminism that is anti-male.

Feminists lobbied for and won legislation to focus on girls in education, to the detriment of boys. This is the exact opposite of what you claim in your “article”. Your points are not supported by the actual actions of feminism.

[–]Inbefore121 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I think that the feminist ideology itself is a major source of the hateful rhetoric that many feminists tens to engage in. I would also like to address that the hateful rhetoric that you disavow is present in all levels of feminism by that I mean from senators, boards of directors, consultants for the CDC to bloggers to your neighbor two doors down. They all do it. A lot. One major reason is because while not all feminist theory and doctrine is outright hateful, (although plenty is) just about ALL feminist ideas facilitate the patterns of thought that LEAD to hate. For example: We live in a patriarchy - men are privileged - women are disadvantaged relative to men at best, subjugated and oppressed at worst - Men facilitate and control this system - men are my oppressors. Hatred or at least distaste of men is the logical conclusion to this train of thought. Looking at it objectively, how could you not begin to hate someone who is oppressing you? Actually I would assert that hating someone who is playing an active role in your oppression is a perfectly logical and reasonable thing to do! The problem is that it's... At best an extremely inaccurate way to describe the current system. And that's a problem.

[–]chance080 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Don’t forget to mention that that line of thought goes both ways, and that should men ever be fed up in large enough numbers, there is little feminists or women in general could do to stop us.

Not advocating for violence, just wanted to say that because history has shown it to be the case every time females were given large amounts of power in society’s. Right before those society’s collapsed. Open a history book that goes into the politics about Rome, or any other great empire. You’ll see

[–]Inbefore121 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Don’t forget to mention that that line of thought goes both ways, and that should men ever be fed up in large enough numbers, there is little feminists or women in general could do to stop us.

What specifically do you mean when you say this then?

[–]chance080 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Again, Open a history book, look specifically at the politics in play preceding the downfall of what were considered “great civilizations”.

I’m adamant on not making it to the downfall of civilization part. If that requires large numbers of men to leave work and let the country grind to a halt until concessions are met then so be it.

If it means we become hunted for being men and have to fight for our rights and lives even further than we already do, so be it.

If we become oppressed and belittled any further than we already are, I pray for the men that can no longer channel or contain that anger, it’s when that reaction becomes the mass norm for us that I am most worried about as it spells out the certain end of anyone who would oppose a mass uprising of men on that scale, and with that level of anger.

There are plenty of ways us men can effectively protest without having to resort to violence. I’d like to think we’d all prefer to not have to get violent. Because we all know the seemingly superhuman tasks and damage we’re capable of when we’re pissed beyond belief and have adrenaline pumping through our veins. We’ve all likely seen that ever capable potential come out from within us before.

Let’s just hope we don’t make it to the same point the other civilizations that have failed have.

You can learn a lot from history, just remember that the world works in cycles, so does social behavior, etc. To think that events won’t repeat themselves eventually given the consistent lobbying against men that feminists have been doing would be foolish.

Newton wrote a law that applied to more than physics: for every action, there is an equal or opposite reaction. This stands true to the social world as well as the business world.

[–]DavidByron2 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"patriarchy" is hate speech

(Abortion, FGM, rape, etc)

Abortion? women have the rights men have none. = female supremacy

FGM is illegal MGM is legal = female supremacy

rape? more men are raped in the USA than women (even excluding jail rape) = female supremacy


You're sounding off the same hate speech that Nazis had about Jews except they called it the Zionist Occupation Government instead of "patriarchy".

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zionist_Occupation_Government_conspiracy_theory

[–]Fast-Mongoose-4989 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

How the f does the system favor men

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Did you read the article?

[–]Fast-Mongoose-4989 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes men did most of that stuff not feminist

Feminist could care less about fathers paying huge amounts of almoney it was the rise of men bringing up those issues that caused more fathers to win costidy battles in the courts that our highly biased agents men

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm sorry. I understood the first half of what you said, but then you lost me.

[–]Fast-Mongoose-4989 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Simple the article states the feminism is responsible for fathers being treated better in the courts when it comes to almoney and child custody

But feminist never said poop about that it was mostly men and mras that spoke about that

[–]gratis_eekhoorn 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

your own comments contradict with eachother you said "man haters are a tiny minority among feminists" in another comment (which is disagree) and now you are denying the existence of misandrist feminists

[–]DavidByron2 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You're part of a hate movement. And you know it.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

What has feminism done for men?

Those things listed in the article? They either weren't even addressed by feminism or were a purely unintended consequence. You can't claim to be helping men, when the only ways you have even helped men was by accidently helping them.

As for family courts, it was feminists that created the problem in the first place and its feminists who fight against default shared custody. No feminist has ever fought for parental rights for men.

If they are counting indirect things that benefitted men, then the patriarchy has benefitted women far more than feminists benefitting men. Increasing quality of life, thus making life safer and better for women has done more for women than "teaching consent".

[–]Clemicus 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

"It's a bad day to stop sniffing glue."

Maybe the first part of point 7 is right, but that's about it.

You missed shared responsibility when it comes to birth control. Two people are involved when it comes to sex. Pregnancy doesn't just fall out of the sky and the pregnancy fairy doesn't exist.

Sing it with me women, if you have unprotected heterosexual sex use Plan B the morning after

The bit about dad bod doesn't translate well into finding a partner and it's just a meme. When it comes to, you used this word, heavier women, the focus for body positivity is always on one side and women who are either thin, petite or, muscular, are shamed

To accept all body sizes then all sizes must be fine -- and thin, petite and, muscular body types have to be accepted too. That doesn't seem to be the case

And its great you believe feminism helped you. In reality, it was other gay men. Who were shamed, made homeless, disowned, reported to the police, arrested and, put in prison, etc

If your end goal was to reach across the aisle, as you stated in another reply, it probably would have been better to write a short post explaining who you are, what you believe then state your reasons for posting this (I'd like to get other peoples' opinions about x, y and z) then go off from that

To be blunt, your article is uninformed on so many aspects and it seems to be professionally written. It wouldn't go a miss if it was published by a major NGO or newspaper

Edit: I just looked at your other post. There's something amiss about it, there's some replies missing going through your comment history. May update post

[–]red_philosopher 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

I'm going to give you a fair shake, since, well, everyone deserves one. And I want you to think long and hard about the answers. I don't want claptrap or rubbish, or feelings being used as fact. Because, well, there are reasons for lots of things, and conspiracy theories are not acceptable.

Toxic masculinity affects women as well as men. As a gay man, there are many times that I’ve had to face stereotypes like “men shouldn’t be feminine,” “men can’t wear makeup,” “men can’t cry.”

Now, I'm going to go out on a limb here and ask you why you think this is "toxic." My experience is similar, but as a heterosexual, I must exhibit these qualities in order to attract women. The more feminine I appear to be, the more makeup I wear, the more emotional I am, the less women I attract. I have tested this, and so have many other men.

If women are the reason men must behave that way (sexual selective pressure is probably the highest pressure there is) then why is it toxic masculinity when it's the result of feminine choice?

Now, for you, it may be different, but you aren't interested in attracting women. You're interested in attracting other gay dudes. Now, it may be "toxic" from your perspective, but when the vast majority of women have sexual preferences (that are well studied and well documented) for masculine, not feminine, men, your argument is nothing but feel-good nonsense.

While it may seem that feminists only care about women, in reality they spend lots of time working to make men’s lives better too.

Prove it. Where's the documented proof of feminists advocating for men's rights in a direct fashion and not claiming "trickle down economics" like the GOP? I've seen more feminists shut down and protest against men's rights than I have ever seen actually advocate with them. I'd be happy to be wrong.

Show me.

Body positivity has popularized the dad bod.

Sorry, but this is a blatant lie. The dad bod is NOT "popular." It's actually a huge turn off in comparison to fitness.

On social media it is more common to hear about how feminists want to make it more acceptable to have bodies of all types for women, but they’ve done the same for men.

No, they haven't. And fitness IS more attractive than unfitness. If anything, it's an excuse to not bear social/sexual consequences for bad life choices.

Feminism works to improve education for all.

Still waiting on those male-only scholarships since men are lagging behind women 3-2 in college education rates. What? Oh no, feminists protest the repeal of sexist female-only scholarships. They don't actually fight to have those sexist scholarships banned.

opening stem to women provides men with more perspectives, giving them a more rounded education.

Okay, I'll bite. But HOW do they go about doing it? With sexist policies that eliminate equally qualified men. In fact, just being a man puts you at a 10% disadvantage. We get a full letter grade less than women do for THE SAME WORK.

Men need birth control too. By helping spread access to birth control — for men as well as women — it helps men too. If they don’t want to have children at that point in their lives, birth control or abstinence is essential.

Agreed. But a lot of feminists are against male forms of birth control. Why?

Judges now give fairer consideration in divorces and child custody hearings. It was common for men to get the short end of the stick in these cases, having to give large sums of alimony and child support when it wasn’t always necessary. Not only that, men are getting more consideration while obtaining full custody of their children, rather than judges always siding with the mother.

That was a hard-won battle. And not because of feminists. Feminists lobby against fairer child support, custody, and alimony laws. No wonder, because they stand to gain from it.

Feminists want to abolish the wage gap. Whether or not you “believe” that it exists — it does —

Now you've lost ALL credibility. The wage gap has been debunked for nearly a decade. Even sex-blind algorithms like UBER's proves that ANY pay gap that exists boils down to CHOICE. Men work longer hours and work in riskier jobs.

They’ve taught consent for people of all genders. Men don’t want sex all the time, and they don’t want it with anyone either. Feminists have increased the discussion surrounding consent and how to obtain it for all parties present.

Is that why feminist lobby against gender-neutral rape laws? Because they teach consent to girls too? Is that why there are no male shelters for male sexual assault victims? Is that why, even though women commit 70% of all DV in relationships with a single perpetrator, feminists lobby against DV shelters for men but say it's okay for women?

As a DV survivor myself, I can tell you that I faced significant backlash simply because I was assumed to be the perpetrator. Even though I had all the physical evidence to back it up.

No, feminists DO NOT fight for men's rights.

So-Called “Feminists” who Hate Men We don’t claim them. They aren’t really feminists. They’re misandrists. They’re a loud, small population of people that only call themselves feminists, while they actually go against the very definition of feminism — equality between all genders.

No true Scotsman.

Bye.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

To respond to your toxic masculinity point: we have had a miscommunication about what toxic masculinity is. It isn't men being masculine. It is men preventing other men from being themselves. "Men don't cry, they have to be tough" is toxic masculinity. "Men can't wear makeup because that's feminine" is toxic masculinity. It isn't about attraction at all. It's about how men act to please other men.

I've read the rest of your reply and will need to find reliable sources later since it is quite late for me at the moment.

Fitness is more attractive than unfitness. If anything, it's an excuse to not bear social/sexual consequences for bad life choices.

I've noticed that a lot of your points so far have focused on sex and finding a suitable partner. I've never framed my opinions of feminism in that way besides legalization of marriage. Anyway, that's just something I noticed. As someone who's attracted to men, I don't find that to be necessarily true. We all have our preferences, but the twink body type is very popular in the gay community. As well as the daddy one.

It's actually a huge turn off in comparison to fitness

I think it's interesting that you note that a specific male body type turns you off. As someone who is attracted to men and spends time in places with others attracted to men, I assure you that dad bods are in fact extremely popular. As a straight guy, it's no wonder that you're not attracted to it, so don't worry about it.

I don't think female-only scholarships are sexist. They work to provide equal opportunities to women. It wasn't that long ago that women were discouraged from or even not allowed to go to college, not to mention stem fields. I personally believe in working towards equity: everyone gets what they need to start on an equal playing field. Not everyone gets the same thing. And I hope that in the near future, female-only scholarships will be archaic.

we get a full letter grade less than women do for the same work

I'm not sure I understand how this one works, but I'm interested in hearing more about this.

a lot of feminists are against male forms of birth control

Like...? Condoms? I don't think so. Vasectomies? I've seen a lot of feminists online calling for men to get them to cut down on abortions. Hormonal BC? I've also seen many feminists call for men to have this since women have to deal with their side effects. I don't believe this one is true, but like I said I would be interested in hearing more about which feminists are against "male birth control."

I'm not saying it's right for men to be at a disadvantage as sexual assault victims. I think there are issues with men and women. It isn't right that men aren't believed. I recall a male celebrity who was groped by a woman on stage. Their names escape my memory, but I'm sure you could find it online. I remember that there was a lot of feminist outrage on feminists social media I follow. I understand that this isn't solid evidence, but I assure you I'm in full support of giving men equal consideration as victims.

I've seen a lot of users here cite no true Scotsman. Must be something common on mensrights spaces. Either way, I still believe they aren't feminists. It's like JK Rowling calling herself a feminist when she's a terf. Call yourself what you will, but that doesn't always mean that's what you are.


I appreciate the effort you took to respond and I apologize that I wasn't able to respond as fully as you may have liked. It's 3 am here and I'm a bit tired! I'll look more into the things you said tomorrow. Thanks.

[–]red_philosopher 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't think female-only scholarships are sexist.

Since you are fond of Merriam-Webster definitions:

Sexist: prejudice or discrimination based on sex

Since the scholarships you mention are discriminatory based on sex, they are, by definition, sexist.

They work to provide equal opportunities to women.

Equal opportunity, or equal outcomes. They are not the same. By denying men the same opportunity to get said scholarship, it automatically means that women have a greater opportunity to attend college than men do (aka, unequal.) And the numbers of graduates bear that out.

I'm not sure I understand how this one works, but I'm interested in hearing more about this.

https://mitili.mit.edu/sites/default/files/project-documents/SEII-Discussion-Paper-2016.07-Terrier.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwiXp_aL2r7zAhUxkmoFHQr2AdcQFnoECBYQAQ&usg=AOvVaw06c-N3OvVdl5igGgK-9yQf

https://amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/380318/&ved=2ahUKEwiSxb-82r7zAhXOk2oFHU0aCd4QFnoECDQQAQ&usg=AOvVaw3ZDNksdPtfVedcsyBG51j4&ampcf=1

https://www.bbc.com/news/education-31751672.amp&ved=2ahUKEwiz2reM3L7zAhXCHjQIHW8rDLE4ChAWegQIAhAB&usg=AOvVaw3pFtjiVbn4BRJyNwwgeeOD

It's out there if you want to read it.

I've seen a lot of users here cite no true Scotsman. Must be something common on mensrights spaces. Either way, I still believe they aren't feminists. It's like JK Rowling calling herself a feminist when she's a terf.

You do realize that TERF means trans-exclusionary radical FEMINIST? And if you actually looked into the term TERF and studied it's etymology, you'd find that it was a term coined by a known RADICAL feminist by the name of Viv Smythe. You'd also know that is currently used to describe anyone that has trans-exclusionary views, regardless of their radicality.

And No True Scotsman is a logical fallacy: https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/No_True_Scotsman

The No True Scotsman (NTS) fallacy is a logical fallacy that occurs when a debater defends the generalization of a group by excluding counter-examples from it.

Such as, "those people aren't REAL feminists." No, they are.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

toxic masculinity

You need to know that that term has as many definitions as there are people who use it, and most of them have nothing to do with the academic definition, which itself gets abused too. I don't believe anybody who cares about men should be using it, and a number of psychologists working with men have already rejected it.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Limiting toxic masculinity isn’t about “hating men” or preventing men from being men. It’s about abolishing gender roles. Toxic masculinity says that men shouldn’t cry. It says that they must like football. They must act a certain way. They must dress a certain way. They must speak a certain way.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I know you mean well, but you've kind of just made my point. Your personal definition doesn't seem to be in line with the current academic one.

You're talking about the policing or inculcation of gender expectations on men, something which is done by both men and women.

The current academic definition of TM refers to those particular gender expectations that are specifically harmful, such as violent behaviour. Hegemonic masculinity is broader and includes traditional expectations that aren't necessarily - of themselves - harmful.

But you can ask another feminist about that since they have supposedly been controlling these definitions for some time now.

[–]DistrictAccurate 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If you are so open to adopt feminist terminology, why do you refuse to be as open to ours?

"Harmful stereotypes" that restrict the actions of men whilst depriving them of help and value for being born with the wrong chromosomes are called misandry. Differentiating between those who are "real men" and those who are not is misandry. Enforcing conformity is misandry. We used misogyny like that for ages. No new terms needed.

It's not that we do not consider these restrictions to be problematic. Even less so that they would be desirable. The terminology, however, is inconsitent with existing language and unneccesarily ambiguous. In fact, the usage of the term itself as well as the relative severity it implies next to misogyny is in itself perpetuating the idea of men's issues as second class issues at best. One that does not need to be addressed and as such makes those who ask for it whiny babies - which is a connotation that needs to be avoided. Ironically, those who use the term are also those who believe that all men who speak about issues in a societal sense are loser incel misogynists for doing so - makes you think about how much they actually care. And don't get me started on fragile masculinity - primarily used to threaten the masculinity of those who fear the punishment that follows if they don't conform. "Can't imagine being so tough that X would threaten me". Not only is this the equivalent to "those who make fun of people with X have X themselves" - which is everything but helpful, it is also ignorant to the experiences of aggression and punishment associated with non-conformity in men that result in that fear and the conformity that follows it.

Using the term perpetuates the issue it allegedly calls out... And does so whilst there already were suitable terms for all aspects of it.

[–]Punder_man 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't think female-only scholarships are sexist. They work to provide equal opportunities to women. It wasn't that long ago that women were discouraged from or even not allowed to go to college, not to mention stem fields. I personally believe in working towards equity: everyone gets what they need to start on an equal playing field. Not everyone gets the same thing. And I hope that in the near future, female-only scholarships will be archaic.

The point the person you replied to was trying to make is it does not matter what happened in the past.. Right NOW women out number men on college campuses and are graduating with higher degrees than men.

Ergo, Equity has already been achieved in regards to women having access to higher learning. However the bar has now swung to the other side where women have more advantages than men do.Feminists actively protest the idea of removing woman only schollaships (Why would they want to give up a privilege they benefit from afterall?) or if a man only schollarship gets proposed they will protest and complain about it being "sexist" because only men are allowed to apply for it.

Schollarships should be based on Merit and nothing else.. but feminists pushed and pushed and pushed for women only schollarships desipte them being sexist by their very nature.

The fact that you don't understand how female only schollarships are NOT sexist proves that you have no business being here trying to explain things as if you understand the gender divide at all!

Let me break out the crayons for you.. If only women are allowed to apply / receive a schollarship that means that its discriminatory towards men because they are not allowed to apply for or receive that schollarship.

Sexism is defined as: "The discrimination or prejudice of someone based upon their gender"
Go learn what Sexim is before you try to defend your postion!

Also, We call you out with the No True Scottsman Fallacy because that's literally what you are doing.
By saying "The feminists who hate men are not true feminists" you are invoking the No True Scottsman fallacy.
Its a fallacy because you are not the figure head of feminism, you are not the one who gets to decide who is and who is not a "true" feminist.

TL;DR: Go learn the basic definitions of things and go read up on how not to construct fallacious arguments before writing your next article.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

The world was built for men.

This is a blinkered view of history, and it suggests that you have swallowed too much ideology rather than attaining a considered sociological perspective. I'm speaking as someone who is not particularly anti-feminist, and as someone who is, like you, a gay man.

The legacy system of gender roles and expectations that feminists attempt to describe as part of their concept of patriarchy did not arise from a world "built for men". It's more accurate to say that men and women were both assigned types of roles and types of value within the system. Just as women were often locked out of certain kinds of power (political, financial), men were locked out of certain kinds of wellbeing and value.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Society has been built for the primary if not express benefit of women, not men. So the exact opposite of this, basically.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Turns out OP did this post as an experiment to see what reactions he'd get. I don't think he was genuinely interested in dialogue about these topics.

I wouldn't actually go as far as what you said, though. "Benefit" is a difficult thing to measure. Historical gender systems certainly afforded women particular forms of protection and wellbeing-provision because one of their primary roles within those systems was baby-maker. The cost was to forgo participation in many other positions with the system, including especially positions of political and financial power.

This means there's some truth to the idea of gynocentrism, and there's also some truth to the idea of patriarchy. But neither are full or complete representations of the system.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Disagree. At the end of the day female lives are valued over male ones by default. This is indisputable and not really a matter for debate. You can contest trifling details about who really benefits and who had it worse and shit but what I wrote in the second sentence of this comment I’m writing right now is reality.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd agree that women were/are valued more on intrinsics while men were/are valued for what they can do and achieve.

Both of these are double-edged swords, and I'm not judging one to be better or worse than the other.

Men faced disposability, crushing pressure and the threat of being assigned "loser" status. Women faced a cage - no matter how gilded and protective that was.

While we've come a long way in acknowledging and fixing women's lack of means for self-determination and value-by-doing, we haven't come a long way in acknowledging and fixing men's lack of means for self-worth and value-by-being.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Thank you for your input. I will look more into what you've described. :)

I agree that there were roles assigned to men, and others assigned to women. More so than meaning that the entire world was built for men, I could have stated it as "the economic, educational, and political spheres of the world were built for men." I'd be happy to hear if that changes anything for you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot of other people have replied to you since I did.

It's not enough for men to constantly be told that everything was built for their forefathers. None of those three spheres you mention really work for most men today.

Consider just education and the growing gap in both school performance and tertiary enrollments. Do you really think that's still built for men?

Consider the number of men dealing with crippling loneliness, disproportionate levels of suicide and rough sleeping homelessness. Does that sound like an economic and political sphere that's built for men?

If feminists want to say that they're working to fix things for men, good for them. All I can say to them is just don't make it worse for men today, and stay out of the way of people who do want to fix those things.

Men need their own movement, and I'll readily agree that many of the movements we have now are hardly positive or effective. But until feminism starts to see things more broadly and not just from a female perspective, I don't think it's capable of properly addressing many of the issues facing men today.

[–]LondonDude123 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminism Exists for Women AND Men. It’s true. While most of the popular media surrounding feminism mainly focuses on women’s experiences and how to reduce women’s inequities in society, there are many ways that feminists work to make life better for men as well.

This should be good. Lets hear them then!

1) Toxic masculinity affects women as well as men. As a gay man, there are many times that I’ve had to face stereotypes like “men shouldn’t be feminine,” “men can’t wear makeup,” “men can’t cry.” While it may seem that feminists only care about women, in reality they spend lots of time working to make men’s lives better too.

So its been scientifically studied and confirmed that women DONT want a "weak" partner, and part of that perceived "weakness" would be crying in front of them. Not to mention the COUNTLESS anecdotal evidence which guys have of them opening up their partners, only to have that weakness exploited and thrown back at them.

IF not crying is "Toxic Masculinity", then WOMEN are the cause of it. Checkmate Feminists?

2) Body positivity has popularized the dad bod. On social media it is more common to hear about how feminists want to make it more acceptable to have bodies of all types for women, but they’ve done the same for men. Are you telling me you’ve never heard how popular the “dad bod” is these days?

Okay, so the dad bod is NOT popular. Its a lie that women say. Simple as that. "Actions speak louder than words" mate.

Secondly, and more importantly, "body positivity" only exists for women, not men. Men are shamed for being less than 6' tall, not having a 6 pack, having a small dick. Sounds very body positive huh?

Theres no defence of this, and YOU saying its right doesnt make it right...

3) Feminism works to improve education for all. You hear that feminists want to improve sex-education in schools, or make stem courses more welcoming to girls, but these things help boys as well. Preparing boys to practice safe and enjoyable sex is obviously beneficial to them, and opening stem to women provides men with more perspectives, giving them a more rounded education.

No. 60% of students in Uni are women, and that number is going up. STEM fields are CONSTANTLY running women only courses and drives and whatever, which throws good smart men out. Sounds very improved to me. Sounds VERY helpful to men to me!

Oh you're talking SEX Education huh? Because the main Feminist points of SE to males are "Dont rape women", and "Always get consent but if shes drunk she cant consent but if you're both drunk you're a rapist and she isnt. Oh and if she regrets it in the morning you're still a rapist". Nothing about safe and enjoyable sex. Not a single thing. Not one.

4) Men need birth control too. By helping spread access to birth control — for men as well as women — it helps men too. If they don’t want to have children at that point in their lives, birth control or abstinence is essential.

Let me just say that Men HAVE birth control. Men have ALWAYS had birth control. Condoms used to be made out of animals intestines (im not kidding, look it up). What Men NEED is Body Autonomy, which they DO NOT HAVE. If I have sex, jizz into a condom, throw it away, she fishes it out of the bin and uses it to get pregnant, then I'm still on the hook for child support. They're literally telling future NFL players at US Colleges to take the used Condoms with them so that this doesnt happen.

Men NEED this, and I dont see Feminism saying a goddamn thing about it.

5) Judges now give fairer consideration in divorces and child custody hearings. It was common for men to get the short end of the stick in these cases, having to give large sums of alimony and child support when it wasn’t always necessary. Not only that, men are getting more consideration while obtaining full custody of their children, rather than judges always siding with the mother.

No. No no no no no no. You're either intentionally stupid or just in denial. How many cases would it take for you to change your mind? Give me a number, and i'll go and find that many for you!

If by "fairer consideration" you mean that they now wait 4 minutes before siding with the mother, sure...

6) Feminists want to abolish the wage gap. Whether or not you “believe” that it exists — it does — I will not go into that in this article. By giving women fair wages compared to men who do the same jobs, women will have higher morale, productivity, and overall happiness in life. If I have to explain how this helps men, I worry about the future of humanity.

It doesnt exist. Get it out of your head that it doesnt exist. Its been disproven many times over. IT! DOES! NOT! EXIST!

Overall happyness in life huh? Listen, im not advocating either way here, but a Womans job literally used to be "Stay at home, clean up a bit, make dinner". Fuck, ID take that over 40-50hrs a week of bullshit! Happier? Nah mate.

7) They’ve taught consent for people of all genders. Men don’t want sex all the time, and they don’t want it with anyone either. Feminists have increased the discussion surrounding consent and how to obtain it for all parties present.

No. They havent. They've screeched and moaned, but no discussion has taken place. See my point earlier.

Also its VERY convenient how you say Men dont want sex all the time, yet women have literally defended female rapists by saying "He had an erection, he wanted it".

8) And more. It is clear that non-feminists’ worries that “feminists will take away men’s rights” are unfounded.

Feminists HAVE taken away Mens rights, or are (the very least) stopping Men getting equal rights. Body Autonomy as I said earlier is one example of this.

Dismantling the Patriarchy. The world was built for men. And although not as many people actively work to suppress women now as in the past, those inequalities still shine through today.

Name them. What legal rights in the West do women NOT have that men DO have? Seriously, answer that question for me, and we'll have a serious discussion going.

For society to have any progress, it is vital that we take action to reduce the gap between the genders, socially, economically, and politically.

I absolutely agree. We can start by bring Men up from the pseudo 2nd class citizen status that we've been given.

So-Called “Feminists” who Hate Men. We don’t claim them. They aren’t really feminists. They’re misandrists. They’re a loud, small population of people that only call themselves feminists, while they actually go against the very definition of feminism — equality between all genders.

I see that everyone else has linked you with Karen Straughan's Responce to this, and also to the idea of the No True Scotsman Fallacy. I SERIOUSLY suggest you read these two bits of information thoroughly before responding to this comment, because you cant reasonable continue to defend the idea that the crazy ones dont count.

Click the above link for more information about how Merriam-Webster defines feminism.

What was it I said earlier? Actions speak louder than words! I couldnt give a fuck what the dictionary says about Feminism, I care about what Feminists are doing here in the REAL world. What they're doing is suppressing Men! Thats it. End of discussion. You cannot argue this. If you TRY to, it shows that you're either deluded, brainwashed, stupid, ignorant, or a combination of all 4.

No offence, and I fully realize that this is both an Ad Hominem and Argument To Authority (you can look those up if you want), but you're a high school student. There are people here that have been fighting FOR Mens Rights, and others Against Feminism for Decades! Literally Decades. There are people who WERE Feminists, who now openly speak out against what they've become. At any point did it not occur to you that those people might have had a point?

I sincerely urge you to think about everything you've been told by these people. You've been indoctrinated into an ideology which has no problem lying to you. You might be gay, but you're still a man. You are the enemy to these people, just remember that.

[–]Jakes1967 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Do feminists want to suppress men?

Oh definitely YES, next question?

[–]FewDegree108 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminist like you are more dangerous than those big mouthed misandrist feminist.

Pretending to help but stabbing from back. Purposefully staying ignorant about men's problem.And then taking credits of men-rights achievement as feminist achievement.

Creating sexist laws against men , and then claiming it is done by patriarchy.

[–]c4944e830acd 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes they do

[–]tenchineuro 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

  • Dismantling the Patriarchy
    The world was built for men. And although not as many people actively work to suppress women now as in the past, those inequalities still shine through today. For society to have any progress, it is vital that we take action to reduce the gap between the genders, socially, economically, and politically.

I think this says everything that needs to be said.

[–]Ok_Research219 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The article can be summed up in a sentence for those that don’t want to read it.

This is the TLDR: Everything is either men’s fault or men’s responsibility.

[–]EmirikolWoker 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The foundational principles of all flavours of feminism (class warfare between men and women with men winning, shorthanded as "Patriarchy") are inherrently anti-male when you examine what needs to be true for it to accurately describe reality. Feminists can claim that it's "just about equality", but it's equality based on bigotted assumptions, presuming psychopathy on the part of men as a class.

Egalitarian values, and mens' rights advocacy in particular, is innately anti-feminist.

[–]Ok-Refrigerator1129 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd like to say that both feminism and mens rights are causes that are both good and bad, like many things in life they both have very strong points that are worth fighting for but also hold negative values and even though I don't associate with either I do respect some aspects and points of both movements and believe that we as a species should focus on being positive and helping each other out.

Perspective of a young hetro dude.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -4 points-3 points-2 points 4 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

Just something I would like to say here, as well as in other communities I've posted this article in (including feminist ones), please know that I meant what I said and said what I meant. Anything that I didn't say, I didn't mean. And anything that I didn't mean, I didn't say. Please don't put words into my mouth!

[–]DavidByron2 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

That's not how this works.

You're so young so maybe you don't know this but feminists routinely lie. So why should anyone think any different of you when you identify with them? Imagine you were talking to some person who said they were part of a well known gay-hating group. And they came to you with stuff defending that anti-gay group saying they weren't like that at all. Would you take their words at face value or would you take into account the movement they were defending and representing, and what you knew about it too?

You could have come in here and talked about these topics without saying you endorsed feminism. You decided not to do that. Your decision. People are responding to that as well as the rest of your words.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -3 points-2 points-1 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

I came here to learn :) that should give me the benefit of the doubt. You are the one with preconceived notions about me, my beliefs, feminism, and you have been targeting me because of my age. This is off-topic a bit, but if you are serious about being in the right, why do you continue to do so to someone you believe is young?

All I ask here is that people -- and as I said, this includes those on feminist communities -- respond to what I say rather than what others say.

[–]DavidByron2 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't think you're hearing what I'm saying still.

You think you're just a nice guy coming in here innocently asking some open ended questions. But the problem is you are also defending a hate movement. So most people are going to VERY REASONABLY interpret your association with hate which you VOLUNTARILY informed us of, as something important to you which informs your opinions and world view. And all that wouldn't be so bad for you except what we know about feminism is that it's about hating men.

You are the one with preconceived notions about ...feminism

No, I have POST-conceived notions because I've been studying this stuff for over twenty years. I have looked a lot of evidence and talked to many people on both sides. YOU have pre-conceived notions about feminism. I'm not putting you down for your age but I do think it means you have less life experience. I assume as you get older you'll get more life experience. And life experience is pretty important on this topic because it's one where there's a ton of misinformation and lies.

I mean for example - did you know more men are raped in the USA than women? Had you even heard of such a thing?

How much more do you not know?

[–]Broadside_Beers 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

What gives you and your buddies that moral authority, the right, or the power, to disavow all the misandry inherent in the political leaders, scholars, and cultural icons of feminism as the movement, first wave through to present, and the inherent hateful attitudes towards men in feminism as an ideology?

How can you and your buddies claim to be the true feminists and disavow the leaders of the movement who make all the social waves, and all the political change, who wrote the essays, theories, books, and doctrine?

How can you keep claiming that you came here to learn new perspectives when all you're doing is doggedly ducking and weaving any allegation that doesn't conform with what you and your circle of friends think feminism is?

NoT aLl FeMiNiStS aRe LiKe ThAt

[–]tenchineuro 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

I came here to learn :)

Looks more like you came here to push the feminist narrative.

But if not, what did you learn grasshopper?

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -4 points-3 points-2 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Not much. Most of the posts here have told me that I'm pushing the feminist narrative, or simply claiming that I'm wrong/lying.

[–]Punder_man 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Maybe, just maybe its because your 'article' is more of an opinion piece which has no facts to back up the claims made within it?

Also, you're not going to convice people that "Feminism is for men too!" just by pointing them to a baised article that you wrote.
Maybe try to understand for a second that while YOU may have had positive interactions with Feminists / Feminism.. many of us in this sub have not.

And so while it might sound grand to announce that "Those who call themselves feminists but hate men are not true feminists" at the end of the day all you have there are words..

And as we have seen, Actions speak louder than words.
You want us to belive that feminism is for men too? then round up these "True" feminists you go on about and start calling out the misandrists, have these "True" feminsits discuss issues that affect men without twisting it into how women are more affected.

Maybe then we'll start to believe.. until then.. its not going to happen.

[–]tenchineuro 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

So you didn't read that long post by Karen Straughan showing what feminism actually does? Or does that even matter to you?

Free clue, feminism is a movement, not a word. If you can't tell the difference between the dictionary and N.O.W., your reality check bounced long ago.

On the other hand, if you blindly believe what others say, well, good luck in your future, you'll need it.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I'm not quite sure I understand why everyone here keeps trying to tell me that I'm blindly believing what other people tell me. The article was about my own experiences of how feminism has benefited my life.

[–]Broadside_Beers 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

How about you try answering Tenchins question Porky. That is, if you truly came here to learn.

[–]PorkyTheChop[S] -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I did read it. I took all that the post said into account, although I don't have time to reply to every single post in this thread, especially the long ones. I do read them, though. :)

[–]Broadside_Beers 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

You are the No True Scotsman fallacy incarnate.

No, your article didn’t take them into account, other than to try and write them off as “not real feminists.”

No, you can’t just disavow them. They are feminists. They believe in their shared ideology, feminism.

You are unbelievable. Literally. Your words, your article, your beliefs, all possess zero credibility.

[–]tenchineuro 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not quite sure I understand why everyone here keeps trying to tell me that I'm blindly believing what other people tell me.

Of that I have no doubt, clueless to the very end.

The article was about my own experiences of how feminism has benefited my life.

And no one believes that. Let's look at 3.

  • Feminism works to improve education for all. You hear that feminists want to improve sex-education in schools, or make stem courses more welcoming to girls, but these things help boys as well. Preparing boys to practice safe and enjoyable sex is obviously beneficial to them, and opening stem to women provides men with more perspectives, giving them a more rounded education.

Feminism makes education hostile to men. Men get poorer grades for the same work, the admissions give preferences for women, there are no programs for men and all the funding paid by student fees goes to programs for women. Feminism has written Title IX so that any woman's complaint must be assumed as true and men's complaints can be summarily dismissed as without merit with no investigation. Men have been suing against Title IX adjudication in federal courts for years and usually win, Most scholarships and financial aid is foe women only. As a result of the massive discrimination against men and boys in the school system boys are doing incredibly poorly, and feminism is patting itself on the back for a job well done.

Feminism is not even about helping women, they wrote a proportionality rule into Title IX that says that there can't be more men's sports than women's sports, which has lead to the destruction of untold thousands of men's sports across the nation to no benefit of girls and women, as any who were interested were already involved.

Look, I realize that hatred and sexism is what you do and support, and above and beyond that you don't care, not a little, not at all. There's nothing I can do about that.

So have a good life while you can.

My advice is that you become less a parrot and seek the truth. But I know you won't, you've already shown that you don't care.

BTW, the sciences are already primarily women, the push in STEM is to get men out of the sciences entirely, through illegal sexist educational preferences and sexist hiring. I'm sure you approve.

[–]reddut_gang 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

most likely

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