Does your love amount change?

StarchRunner · 2022-03-14T03:02:14+00:00

My love for my partner is constant. How much I like them can vary. But love is a choice made daily even if someone is pissing you off

Orange_Paisley · 2022-03-14T03:16:54+00:00

I wouldn’t say it changes. I get mad sometimes as I am sure he does. I never stop loving him though. He’s my family. Now if he cheated or something I might end things but I wouldn’t stop loving him right away - I would recognize that loving him was no longer healthy for me.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-03-14T02:59:06+00:00

I mean it can change but not necessarily based off of individual actions like you're describing, if either person goes through some kind of drastic change in personality, the love can change to an extent.

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-03-14T02:47:22+00:00

I love my wife but ngl some of the misandrist shit she says makes me want to give her the people's elbow

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houstongradengineer · 2022-03-14T03:17:08+00:00

Love is a pretty deep thing, and it has many forms. It takes some pretty big things- like gifts and sharing meals- can grow bonds from like into love. It's pretty hard to break love down, or to change love. It's as hard to break love as it is to get love. That's the difference between infatuation or strong like and love. Once you truly want to see someone succeed, you probably will keep feeling that way until they do soemthing really awful. Once you find yourself enjoying a lot of intimacy and romance with a person, that probably won't change unless something big changes. Like if someone cheats and hides it for years while you do their laundry, you might honestly hate them. Or someone might just show an incompatibility when it naturaly comes out but they also might be a good person. If that happens, you might just go to loving them as a friend or loving from afar. I have former flames who I love as friends. They could come to me tomorrow, and I'd protect them from harm the best I could. I also have a former flame or 2 that I have some harsh words for. My husband, however, is the only man I've ever loved fully with my hand in marriage and my body. I don't think I could be his close friend, but he's a truly good man. He'd probably have to commit a literal crime in order to get me to not really want him to succeed and be happy. I might do that from afar, though, if I had to move on for any real reason. Distance helps to move on, that I know.

42nanaimobars · 2022-03-14T03:17:38+00:00

Yes, but not because of trivial things. What is trivial? That’s up to me, I guess.

TheEternalGhost · 2022-03-14T03:38:21+00:00

There's different kinds of things that are all called love. English fails at differentiating them.

I love my mother, and that doesn't change if she cooks a nice meal for me or if we have a fight.

If I've been with a woman for 3 months and have the butterflies honeymoon period thing, that won't be enhanced by a meal and probably won't go away from a small fight.

If I've been with a woman for 3 years and the butterflies are long gone, then the way I feel ebbs and flows based on her behaviours. I will definitely love her more after she's been consistently good to me for a period and less if we're not getting along. If we're not getting along consistently for long enough eventually the love will be completely gone and replaced by resentment. If we're getting along then I will never lose the love for her, because that level of comfort-love is a completely different thing than honeymoon-love.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2022-03-14T03:51:25+00:00

There is unintentional love and intentional love. Unintentional love is when I enjoy your face and personality, intentional love is when I actively make sure you keep enjoying mine too and vice versa.

Intentional Love for me is about mitigating or reducing psychological, emotional, and physical stress and stressors that inevitably effect your partner by just living life and keeping it at a minimum level, by not increasing it when around me or I around them by doing whatever that is. Acts of Service are the bare minimum #1 love language for me, because keeping healthy has never sustained itself by inaction.

This doesn't mean you are 'working hard to stay together' but instead 'preventing good things from falling apart'.

TrevorBla · 2022-03-14T10:09:28+00:00

More as the time goes on. Not less when they’re nicer or when we’re fighting, still the same.

Freevoulous · 2022-03-14T13:57:24+00:00

My Love for family is constant, but romantic love is dynamic and depends on how they act. Sex, respect and intelligent conversation makes me love them more.

Suspicious-Pie-5356 · 2022-03-14T14:44:05+00:00

My love for my girlfriend has only grown. We’ve never even fought, when we have disagreements we talk it out like adults. it’s wild i’m so not used to people just saying what they want and backing that up with their actions

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2022-03-14T16:59:39+00:00

My love has grown I love my husband more than I did a year into our relationship

I don’t love him less when he pisses me off or love him more when he does someone nice

slut-forager · 2022-03-16T04:54:22+00:00

I will always love my partner, but feelings are inconsistent, so I rely more on my commitment to them more than how “in love” I feel. Sometimes I’ll be furious with them and it’ll be difficult to feel love at that time, but when I remember why I’m committed to them it reminds me of how much I love them even if it’s difficult to feel that way right in that moment. It’s pretty useful for rough patches ngl

Title	Does your love amount change?
Author	Rispy_Girl
Upvotes	4
Comments	36
Date	March 14, 2022 1:48 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/tdm829/does_your_love_amount_change/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/does-your-love-amount-change.1106382 https://theredarchive.com/post/1106382

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