Starting to look for a lawyer today. Want to get ahead of the inevitable. Any advice?

jimsmythee · 2022-11-08T23:34:45+00:00

Find a lawyer that only wants to hear the meat and potatoes of a divorce. That’s the financials.

Any lawyer that wants to hear your life’s story only cares about billable hours.

My lawyer only cared about W2’s and paystubs and court documents and house deeds and 401k’s. Because that’s all a divorce is about. Money.

Far-Difference-8733 · 2022-11-08T22:55:01+00:00

These things are so situation dependent, it’s hard to give blanket advice. How complex is your financial situation? How amicable is your divorce? Kids? All need to be taken into account and I’ll tell you from experience that the first time you tell your story to someone is the authentic version of it. It’s where you get it all out. If your situation is complex or contentious - don’t use that initial story here. Use it on someone who can truly help you or point you in the right direction. Find a lawyer with really good reviews and tell it to them - use us to vent and to discuss.

Jigglytep · 2022-11-09T03:22:45+00:00

I love my Atturney! Somethings that made me choose him. He talked frankly and directly. During in our consultation he educated me about how divorce worked and the law was applied. He told me that while the law was written to be equivalent to men and women a judge was not going to give a man primary custody if the mom isn’t on drugs or a criminal even though I was a primary care giver. At least very difficult.

I also picked him because he was a former prosecutor and went to a law school in NYC that is famous for offering night classes.

He knew what information to ask for to help in the negotiating.

dday_throwaway3 · 2022-11-08T23:53:19+00:00

Financial austerity measures and other preparatory measures: http://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?t=13374

Do not move out: http://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=81622

Protect yourself from false DV accusations: http://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?t=80375

How to interview attorneys: http://forum.mensdivorce.com/viewtopic.php?t=13377

pk2at · 2022-11-09T16:52:48+00:00

Not sure how much a lawyer can help. Courts care only about money and assets. If you fully cooperate and disclose everything like a fool, you will lose 50% or more of what you have made. If you can creatively hide and transfer money out of marital assets, you will come out on top (redditors will advise you this is not legal, don't listen to them)

walkingdisaster4046 · 2022-11-10T03:09:47+00:00

Questions to consider for interviewing lawyer that you may find helpful:

1) What percentage of cases have been resolved in mediation, collaborative law, arbitration or trial? Do they work towards compromise or fight in court.

2) How many cases are you currently handling? Will signal if overloaded and you maybe an after thought or limited availability.

3) What is the expectation on communication (when, frequency, channel)? What is expect time to respond by lawyer? Don’t want to sit around and get no response for weeks on end.

4) if applicable do they experience with high income earner in conflict mgmt? What about child custody and high conflict?

5) Do they have a paralegal available you can leverage? Will cost you less and help move things along with paperwork and correspondence.

6) Do they know the judge (if already served filed w court)?

7) Ask for high level opinion on how they’d approach/handle your case.

8) What is initial retainer, billing frequency and hourly rates of team (ex: paralegal vs attorney)

Hope that helps.

Title	Starting to look for a lawyer today. Want to get ahead of the inevitable. Any advice?
Author	WHawk6186
Upvotes	4
Comments	13
Date	November 8, 2022 10:42 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/yq0zmo/starting_to_look_for_a_lawyer_today_want_to_get/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/starting-to-look-for-a-lawyer-today-want-to-get.1139321 https://theredarchive.com/post/1139321

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